I was reading this article on healing guilt:
https://www.think-kind.com/writers/2...sty-word-guilt
and tried this out:
Quote:
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Journal. Write it alllllll out. Write how it makes you feel. Why it makes you feel. Who makes you feel. What makes you feel. Just free write. I don't care if it isn't legible or has terrible grammar with #hashtags. Free write. Then, free write how you would forgive someone that you love wholeheartedly for the same action. Finally, write those words of forgiveness, but to yourself.
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The part about how you would forgive someone you love wholeheartedly for making the same mistake I did. At first I missed the "someone you love" part, and just tried it on "someone", I see that that someone that popped into my head looked a lot like me, I was like "****, I don't know if I can, maybe if the person was struggling like mad and enduring all kinds of ordeals in their determination to not ever **** up again maybe, but then again they could still **** up again if conditions are extreme enough". Then I noticed it said someone I love wholeheartedly, so I shifted to this very person I feel guilty over having accidentally harmed and the picture looks so profoundly different, I just feel a blast of love in my heart, shes already forgiven, she never even had anything to be forgiven over, she made a mistake and learned from the most profound difficult lessons from it, it in no way changes how I love her and perceive her.
Yeah that's something really powerful, its like its my ego thats holding onto the guilt or something. The crazy thing is I think maybe I'd have deeper love for her if she was carrying this. Is this a reflection of self hatred? Like I'm holding myself to higher standards cuz I unconsciously reject myself? Or maybe its cuz we lived different lives, its more okay in my mind for her to have made this mistake than me.
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