Stagnant energy in my life? Why is change so hard for me?

mysterious · #1 08-02-2011, 04:15 PM

After I finished uni I went into depression and thought life was hopeless. However I guess I have always been a gloomy person. I just think whats the point of it all. I don't have any friends and think nobody would want to hang out with me anyway if I am so negative. I find maintaining relationships hard work and don't really trust people. Sometimes I hate everyone and just want to be left alone - but this is not life, and I know I need ppl to survive.
I have a p/t job which I hate and have been there for 9 years and these days its hard to get a new job. In the past, when I got accepted for new jobs I found that I would always sabotage myself either by quitting after the 2nd day or not even going to the interview. And then I would feel really angry at myself, saying "why do I do this to myself"? and then am still at this current job which I hate. I hate myself for doing this and think whats wrong with me?
Its a vicous cycle which can be really hard, but not impossible to get out of.

Why is change so hard for me, anyone?

[p.s - if you think posting this thread in a different category will get better results plz state]

Silver · #2 08-02-2011, 04:21 PM

Hi mysterious, well, I think there's gotta be some history behind all the gloom and negative cloud swirling around you in your life...you have the answers, not anyone out there, but maybe give yourself half a chance, oh and other people half a chance, without being naive or easily taken advantage of. I understand about trusting or not trusting people, sorry to say I've run into too many people who turned out to not be so trustworthy. One thing I did discover was that I myself was not completely trustworthy or 'perfect'. I'm thinking your expectations of people, life and yourself are maybe just a little bit 'off' if you know what I mean. Chin up, life will get better.

Roselove · #3 08-02-2011, 04:27 PM

Depression is a state of hopelessness, when you feel the situation is out of control. You are lacking self esteem and self worth, when you feel you don't deserve good things, you won't get them. Your relationship with yourself determines what you attract in your life, there is a negative cycle you need to break.. look to your childhood any trauma etc? Therapy can take years though I reccomend you see one, I also reccomend shamanic healing specifically illumations, the illumation will remove the negative imprint from negative events in your life so that they won't repeat

try to cut down on wheat, sugar and dairy as they keep stagnant energy in the body, and switch to more raw fruits and vegetables.. try eft

Silver · #4 08-02-2011, 04:35 PM

I think Rosewater hyas some good ideas, I cut out all sodas in my life years ago and I'm not sorry for that, feel much better. I cut back on all the refined starches, although gotta have a little pizza now and then, lol.

I myself would like to know more about the illuminations thing.

It helps in life to know what you really believe in, so that you can be supportive of yourself, and feel genuinely good about who you are.

mysterious · #5 08-02-2011, 06:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Silvergirl

Hi mysterious, well, I think there's gotta be some history behind all the gloom and negative cloud swirling around you in your life...you have the answers, not anyone out there, but maybe give yourself half a chance, oh and other people half a chance, without being naive or easily taken advantage of. I understand about trusting or not trusting people, sorry to say I've run into too many people who turned out to not be so trustworthy. One thing I did discover was that I myself was not completely trustworthy or 'perfect'. I'm thinking your expectations of people, life and yourself are maybe just a little bit 'off' if you know what I mean. Chin up, life will get better.

plz could you elabourate on this - what do you mean?

Silver · #6 08-02-2011, 07:24 PM

I'm trying to say that you expect more people to be 'better' or more trustworthy and in life, it's a matter of you gotta be careful who you do business with, emotionally or financially because there are a lot of rip off artists. Your being wary of people isn't a bad thing. Gotta make room for people though, you expect more perfection from yourself and others than is practical? As far as expectations of what Life offers, the old saying from the old song, "I never promised you a rose garden," or god or the fates doesn't promise any of us anything, really. Everyone has to do their personal best to bring about the best in themselves, just trying to say a general thing here, I think you probably are being fairly reasonable in not trusting just anybody and so on. Just let me know if you need more clarification, but I think that's a pretty good explanation. I hope things get better for you and your life. I'll be back a little later today.

mysterious · #7 08-02-2011, 08:26 PM

So basically do you think I have this high expectation of those aspects - like to be too perfect, which can never be achived. Like my thinking is too harsh and unrealistic - because that makes sense.

I feel better and its great analysis. I just feel really lonely sometimes. Just wondering from a different perspective - how bad do you think my issue is, should i go and see someone about it to help?