problems with meditating

DarkAsylum:

I don't feel equipped to help you as I don't have your issue, but I'm very interested in your situation. Would you be able to elaborate on the situation? Could you describe what happened when you tried to meditate in more detail?

I have experience teaching meditation to other people and I can tell you what works for 'normal' people who have thoughts distracting them. I don't know if it will work for your situation but you can try it.

The thing about thoughts and distractions is that in order to try to push them away you have to pay attention to them. By paying attention to them you strengthen their hold over you. Actively ignoring them also doesn't work because then, again, you are concentrating on them in order to not pay attention to them. So basically, the direct approach will never work. There are, fortunately, two other approaches that can work and actually work best in tandem.

The first is to have a Focus. The most accessible focus is Breathing, but having something that is Visual or Auditory might be better. These are referred to in Hindi as Mandalas (visual meditation patterns) and Mantras (auditory meditation affirmations). You can use anything though. Useful and fun visual aids include candle flames, Dhali's art or anything with an intricate pattern. Useful phrases include any famous quote that you are particularly drawn to.

Throughout a focussed meditation you will use your focus to anchor your thoughts. You can let your mind wander but your mind should create a 'thought map' which begins at your focus and extends/expands from there, exploring related thoughts. If your mind strays or distractions creep in then simply retrace your steps and get back on the map. If you lose your place then go back to the beginning and either retrace your steps or begin a new thought branch.


The second method that can be used is called 'postponement'. When a thought or distraction creeps into your mind you should try to follow this process: (1) Acknowledge the thought or distraction. Move it from your peripheral awareness to your primary awareness. It only distracts you when it's in your periphery; when you move a thought or distraction to your primary awareness you start to assert a bit of control over it. (2) Address your thought or distraction, saying some variation of "I acknowledge you but I don't need you right now. I am busy with something else. If you are important I will think about you later." By doing this you are creating a separation between yourself and the thought and also asserting a bit more control over your own mind. At the same time you are not being harsh and 'offending' the thought. You remain calm, centered and gentle. (3) Allow the thought to float away. Give it a gentle nudge if you'd like to speed it on it's way. Once it begins to leave go back to your meditation and ignore it. It's important that once it begins to leave you ignore it completely so that it drifts off fully and doesn't get stuck in your periphery again. If that happens, which it probably will the first few times you attempt this technique, simple repeat the process from step one. Don't get discouraged if the process doesn't work for you in the first few attempts, instead think of this process as a meditation in and of itself. Deepen your perceptions and pay attention to the mental processes you are using.

At first the postponement process might take a minute or so but as you get more experienced it should get easier and faster until it will take a few seconds and, eventually, be a natural process which transcends the steps and amounts to a simple 'shoo'.


I hope these techniques help you. Either way I would love to hear some feedback if you try them, that way I can be better equipped to help others should the situation arise. Peace be with you!