I'm haunted

[Impulsv]

I'd would or could move on much easier n say all this was imagination. After all who want to be stuck for years in unrequited love and miss another great love waiting. Once I feel I'm moving on I'm reminded by the sign this Xmas eve when he responded to me telling him I accept freindship
N that I know some some connections are meant to be freinds . Didn't expect a response at all but Xmas eve at 1111 pm he responded by email he was glad I accepted freindship. Why what torturous journey if not for that number I'd easily walk. But was this all just a lie. Does he know abd is trying to tell me tf. if not if synchronicity should I trust well be together. So despite pushing it all in back of my head and moving on just as I'm about to a simple thought Xmas eve 1111 wait. I can be by my self and ok for ever if that's my destiny but not for unrequited love not to wait for someone. As I want a joyful life. I think I'm getting there.

[Nada]

What is wrong with friendship for life?
All my romantic relationships had came and gone.

But all my longterm friendships with soul connections have stayed as friends and will stay as friends for life.

If your "TF" has already been in your life for years, why not be greatest friends for life?
Why struggle, insist, and fight to be lovers??
Passion will eventually fade and will become friendship anyway.

Wouldn't it be just wonderful to actually share stories of your "TF" experience with him? He is the only person who would understand your experience. It would be such a comfort to share this side of spirituality with someone who actually is at the end of that soul connection.
Plus, this kind of strong soul connection will be with you whether or not he is in or out of your physical life.
So, why not embrace its permanence and keep him around as a friend?

It would be great healing.. together.

[Impulsv]

Sounds great but even in freindship it feels onesided. I struggle with that i feel if i dont contact him he never will. Perhaps we re not ready. Or im not ready. I want him to be part of my life but he Seems not to want to be part of it as i havent seen much initiating from his part. I do know that he will always answer when i call but our convos are not too deep. Maybe i need time. No were are not there yet to discuss this Connection we have just eluded to it n he verbally hasn't acknowledged. Maybe our freindship will not bee deep in convo n just touching bases through the years how we've been for past two years.

[Nada]

I see.
When even a friendship is not working, an actual romantic relationship is never going to work.

Friendship, a good solid friendship, is a foundation of any functioning and longterm romantic relationship.

Unconditional love between two unrelated people grows and stays in the layer of mutual and deep friendship.

Be his friend without any expectation of romance.
Do not expect him to longing for you or chase you like a lover would.
He is not your lover, just a friend.
Let your expectation go.

Once you let go of your "romantic" expectation and stop confronting his lack of romantic desire for you, he will become a true friend without feeling guilty for disappointing you by not meeting your romantic expectation.

Let his own friendship develops in his own way.
Guys do not usually call other guys all the time.
They usually call to make an arrangement to do something together.
Men bond through actions with their friends.

[Impulsv]

Thanks I think I need to deal with these lingering expectation even in freindship then ill call. Frankly I've never really had male freindships since high school lol. I guess time will tell then ill call when I'm ready. Your right its these lingering romantic feelings that I must work through

[Impulsv]

Question how do I do it. I do want to be in that place. Honestly the moment I saw him first thought was we will be great freinds, he must be part of my life. But it's confusing when u feel so much for someone.

[Nada]

Question how do I do it.

First, you are in luck since he already invited you to the friendship. Many men are unable to pass their sexual desires for women that they like enough to be friends with. Some men can be friends with women without any problem. He sounds to be one of those men who can see women for more than as sex objects. So, feel blessed first.

Second, be in touch with your own soul. See yourself as a soul, not as a woman.

Third, see him as a soul, without thinking of him as a man. Souls do not have genders. Souls are energy beings. Look pass his physical form. See his soul. Be a friend to his soul.


Friendship... between two souls.

[MorningStar]

I agree with everything Nada just said, but would like to add one thing. Drop the expectations. NO expectations and I can pretty much guarantee you'll be happily surprised with the results. Well, at least it works for me.

[Impulsv]

Thanks I'm trying to drop them I think I do then feelings emerge of resentment or feeling toyed with then followed by anger. Then I get really unconditional , think I can do it ,and cycle begins. I guess I should just expect he offered freindship verbally n ill just call when I feel like it. In mean time process out this lingering attachments. How have u ladies reached this point? I meditate and reiki. It has helped going above the pain but I know my lesson is to learn unconditional love. Trying to find how to reach it. I've been focusing on me since I read once u love yourself unconditional then it will pour over to others.

[Nada]

Thanks I'm trying to drop them I think I do then feelings emerge of resentment or feeling toyed with then followed by anger. Then I get really unconditional , think I can do it ,and cycle begins. I guess I should just expect he offered freindship verbally n ill just call when I feel like it. In mean time process out this lingering attachments. How have u ladies reached this point? I meditate and reiki. It has helped going above the pain but I know my lesson is to learn unconditional love. Trying to find how to reach it. I've been focusing on me since I read once u love yourself unconditional then it will pour over to others.

You will have to find your own ways that would work for YOU.

Often people think that there is this ONE magic to "cure" this kind of spiritual struggles in soul plane.
There is not such magic.

Meditation, reiki, other healing can help you.
However, these are just temporary fixes.

Ultimately, it is YOU who has to accept your soul and be able to detach yourself from your physical expections to reach your own self awareness.

[Impulsv]

I guess it's about trusting my soul knows its path? Trust in universe what will be will be and enjoy now. I get it at moments like these. My struggle is to be constant I guess if I look at as cleansing every time I feel attachment and accept I'm still in this place n hope I will move to complete unconditional love one day.

[Niebla0007]

Hi! Miss Im,
From the relationships I had,
I just give the guy hints, give him a start, or motive in some way for what I want. Actually, I am not even aware of doing this most of the time.
I found that it is best Not to focus on how I feel or want from somebody.
But rather try and understand the guy instead,
and listen to him. Sound him out.
The guy would be there for you, be there with you if he wants you.
Even when I get somebody serious, I tend to test the guy how far he wants to go.

[psychoslice]

Stop thinking too much and just live, its a lot easier.:smile:

[Impulsv]

I'm not good at that. In two years trying to figure him out sound him strategize no longer doing that as I'm tired exhausted. He has said he is not interested romantically n his only interest is freindship. I appreciate the advise as perhaps my inexperience has ruined it for this man which hurts because he has been the only man I fell for at first sight. But I will follow the advise with the next soul connection. So yes the guy would be there for me if he wanted it. He has shown obviously he doesn't. Yet this tf thing is never conventional n would have no problem seeing the reality of it. but that 1111 gives me false hope. I'm afraid I'm too late for that with this man and it pains me. No fault of my own circumstance of fresh out of divorce, cancer, losing everything. I did the best I could I gave it 110 n wouldn't change it for an outcome. Like they say its about the process not the outcome. But I'm not going to deny it pains not being ready for the love of my life. Then I remember , it all was/is as it should.

[Niebla0007]

:hug3: Sorry to hear that, Miss Im.
I had been through divorce and an extraordinary separation beforehand,
I understand.
What is important is YOU,
a part of our spiritual transformations and regeneration
is letting go of attachments which no longer are beneficial to us.
There are still existing people who likes to make somebody happy.
:smile: Hope you'd cross path with one soon enough.
In fact, that is one of the best thought to have before sleeping,
like somebody's other post about Positive thinking today
especially in this world which is not perfect.

[Impulsv]

Thank you, I will tonight :)

[SomewhereInTime]

Second, be in touch with your own soul. See yourself as a soul, not as a woman.

Third, see him as a soul, without thinking of him as a man. Souls do not have genders. Souls are energy beings. Look pass his physical form. See his soul. Be a friend to his soul.


Friendship... between two souls.

Beautifully said! This is so helpful. Thank you.

I have so many days where I really want to shut this off, shut off these feelings. It's painful and frustrating. I often wish I never encountered him so I wouldn't be feeling this way after all these years.:crybaby2: