Entering the light... my father

[ellespirit]

My father passed 5 years ago and I was told by a spiritual medium (I have no yet amassed my own skills) (on two occasions that I sought assistance, I believe to try and find some peace with my grief), that he is always with me. He stays with me.

A mind body spirit therapist (friend) said to me just yesterday that it's I, who are not letting him go, that I am keeping him to me and that I ought to let him go "get over it" and let him go to the light. I am keeping him in my energy field.

I'm new to all of this and trying to understand why he hasn't gone "to the light". Once the departed go to the light, can they come back to Earth to visit us still?

I'm sorry if I'm not making sense.

[Jeff4freedom]

If your Father is in your soul Group... he is always there for you.

But your friend blaming you for holding your Dad back is only a tiny bit right.

The reason souls don't pass on is because THEY cling to their Construct....which in just a few words is their Past, or it's an energetic astral reflection of who they were. If your Dad indeed has not passed into the Light, this is why.. But the other half is that by your clinging to your thoughts and emotions of your Dad.... this magnetizes his construct....his astral energetic reflection.... that he has attached himself to, in his desire for ,"what was". So your not "getting over it" doesn't help matters, but it is not the reason why he hasn't gone into the Light.... that was totally caused by his attachment to "what was".

[rainbowcrow]

I hope you don't mind me asking a few questions Jeff :)
So how does one go about "letting go" or "getting over it"? Does one have to stop thinking about the person who has passed or just try not to be as emotional whilst thinking of them? And is it our own soul that doesn't want to let go, or is it just more of a "human" condition?

rc

[Jeff4freedom]

Hey Rainbow Crow, No I don't mind.
I think you are on to it with "trying not to be emotional while thinking about it". But that can be easier said than done. It can take a fair amount of work because our attachments, especially to parents can run so deep. And it isn't like just ,"we're attached to our Dad".... Rather we are attached to hundreds of experiences and memories about them.. Our constructs are maintained by our own thoughts and the thoughts and emotions of others. Souls that do not pass on do so because they have "turned towards their construct" and become attached. Virtually they are trapped by their ideas about themselves, and everyone elses ideas about them.... over many lifetimes in fact. So to blame ellespirit for trapping his Dad was kind of Jive, because his Dad is the one who chose, and ellesspirit is only a small part of what maintains the life of the construct that his Dad has attached to.

Your second question, are you referring to ellespirit not letting go of their Dad, or their Dad not letting go of His Past ...his Construct ?

I love that question either way...

Hmmm?

OK, the soul is all about evolution.....
that is the most notable quality of a soul.
But the soul has two faces,
depending upon it's age.
Once a soul culminates it's separate expression it is pretty close to impossible for it to "go back"...
For it to deny the Light.
But until that point, sometimes referred to as the "turning back upon the Wheel"
The soul isn't Bound directly in it's direction to the Light..
And the "human condition" of the consciousness can cause it to "turn back upon it's Construct".
Making it trapped so to speak, in ,"what was".
Above I am referring to the soul of one who has left the body.

As far as the soul of one who grieves for the one who has left the body,
it is more of a ,"human condition". Because especially if there is a Soul Group connection.... your soul knows there is no real separation....
that we are still connected.
In reality we are bound to every other in the Web of Life by a golden cord...
but those in our "soul group" are the closest to us in the Web...
Our connection is strong and life or death can not sever it.
And the soul is totally aware of this fact.
So the attachment is a "human condition".

[rainbowcrow]

Thank-you Jeff for your answers, particularly for the answers to the second question. It was very interesting to read your thoughts from both perspectives. So from what you have shared it would make sense to assume that it is the inexperienced (?) soul who has left the body that still "feels" the attachment to the human condition and chooses not to let go therefore our grief over their loss is but a mere few strands of twine in the rope that holds the anchor so to speak.
But even if this is the case, are we ever, as humans, responsible for "holding on" too tight for too long to someone who has left and therefore somehow hindering the advancement of that soul (a soul who has not "turned towards their construct")? Or do you think long-term grief or "human attachment" is accepted as part of the human condition and more the responsibility of the soul who is experiencing the grief - in other words is long-term grief more likely to hinder the advancement of the soul who is grieving rather than have any effect on the soul who has left? I hope that makes some sense :redface:

[Jeff4freedom]

Wow, Rainbowcrow,

Yeah the first part..
You probably said that better than I did.

"But even if this is the case, are we ever, as humans, responsible for "holding on" too tight for too long to someone who has left and therefore somehow hindering the advancement of that soul (a soul who has not "turned towards their construct")?"

That is a very good Question... If the soul has not turned back too it's construct.... I don't believe that it is "hindered" in any way by one who clings to strands of that construct (so to speak)

Or do you think long-term grief or "human attachment" is accepted as part of the human condition and more the responsibility of the soul who is experiencing the grief - in other words is long-term grief more likely to hinder the advancement of the soul who is grieving rather than have any effect on the soul who has left?

This is another very good question.... But I think it has more than one answer..

The first answer is Yes.....


And the second answer is No...

He he..

The "Yes" we can understand within our Logic System.

But the No is a little more elusive.

And it hinges on the word "Hindered".

We have lived closely with that word for Lifetimes...

Hindered by This and that

this and that thing Holding us Back...

We learned and enumerated the Hindrances to our souls development

we had the best of intentions.

We wrote books, we practiced, we meditated....

Lifetimes Fighting the Hindrances....

But just how hindered were we really..

Here we are....

If we hadn't been Hindered,

where would we be now...?

AHEAD OF OUR GROUP

then we'd just have to freakin wait.


It's all connected...

it all moves together...

Where our souls are right now...

Is exactly where they belong

So what are these "Hindrances"?


That which hinders us,
only hinders us,
when we are not totally Present.


We have looked at what was ahead of us in the road for so long
we have lost sight of where we stand.

And where we stand
it turns out...

All along was the Destination.

It's time for perspectives to change.... to loosen

and Merge

Frequency change on the Horizon for everybody...

We're all One Thing





I hope that makes some sense

You make more sense in a few words than most people I know...

[ellespirit]

OMG that was so insightful. Thank you both and rainbow crow thank you for articulating my thoughts so clearly.

I'm going to try and digest this before I post my questions.

[NightSpirit]

I stumbled upon this (haha...there is never a stumble, is there?) and read it all through.

May I ask something Jeff as you seem to be versed well on this subject?

In your own personal views, can a soul that is passed over be able to let go of his/her construct and merge, yet still be able to have 'one foot here and one foot there', so to speak? So now we're talking about release of attachment by all parties, the soul moving into the Light, yet still being able to announce its energetic presence to its loved ones? Or is that idea only coming from the parties left behind who wish to cling to and imagine that presence near?

Cheers :smile:

[ellespirit]

Good question nightspirit. Looking forward to the reply. I was daddy girl and I know he was conflicted leaving me behind as a single parent with two kids. He told people before he passed he was so conflicted about not being around to help me raise my sons.

[seahorse]

A question ? How can we really be sure it's our relatives speaking to us ? Couldn't a malevolent spirit impersonate our loved ones ? And if the concept of reincarnation is correct shouldn't these souls have passed in another body or permanently joined the Light or whatever ? In this case who are we really communicate with ?

[Adrienne]

hello seahorse, good questions. You just know, when it is a relative or close one who is speaking to you, difficult to describe. The way they talk to you, using similar phrases they used before, perhaps you will notice a particular scent... for example the perfume your grandma used to wear, or the scent of cigar smoke if a relative smoked cigars. You will feel their presence.

Dream Angel xx

[Adrienne]

hi ellespirit,

It is different for each person, in regards to dealing with grief and losing someone they love. Some people have longer grieving periods of time, some have shorter. Some people want to continue the communication after a person has passed over, some just let go.

I believe that if someone, your father for example, is still with you it is his choice to do so. I am not totally convinced on the idea that we are holding someone back, by wanting to communicate with them. Maybe this is not exactly what you mean with your questions ? In some cases, yes it is probably better to let go, if it is preventing you from living your life.

blessings,
Dream Angel xx

ps NS ~ speaking of " one foot here, one foot there "..... this is how I feel sometimes

[NightSpirit]

hi ellespirit,

It is different for each person, in regards to dealing with grief and losing someone they love. Some people have longer grieving periods of time, some have shorter. Some people want to continue the communication after a person has passed over, some just let go.

I believe that if someone, your father for example, is still with you it is his choice to do so. I am not totally convinced on the idea that we are holding someone back, by wanting to communicate with them. Maybe this is not exactly what you mean with your questions ? In some cases, yes it is probably better to let go, if it is preventing you from living your life.

blessings,
Dream Angel xx

ps NS ~ speaking of " one foot here, one foot there "..... this is how I feel sometimes


Hi DS
Do you mean you feel as though you have one foot each side, or that you are experiencing the same with a loved one?

[Adrienne]

actually it is DA, but I can answer to DS too :tongue:

it is me that feels like I have one foot here and one foot on the other side at times. I have a friend in spirit that I communicate with and at times it seems like I can just reach thru the veil and reach his hand. I guess if I can feel this way, then he must be able to do the same, reach thru to communicate with me

[NightSpirit]

actually it is DA, but I can answer to DS too :tongue:

it is me that feels like I have one foot here and one foot on the other side at times. I have a friend in spirit that I communicate with and at times it seems like I can just reach thru the veil and reach his hand. I guess if I can feel this way, then he must be able to do the same, reach thru to communicate with me

A thousand apologies. I have stereo going here. Partner background chatting while I'm trying to concentrate typing lol...equal time ya know :wink:

mmm...i do believe we are more veiled then spirit because we have many distractions. Do you feel comfortable with one foot here and one there?

[Adrienne]

no problem, no apologies necessary ~ I figured you were talking to me :D

I think of the veil as like a curtain, seperating us ~ sometimes the curtain is thin, sometimes it feels like heavy velvet. Yes, I do feel comfortable, it is a very nice feeling a little floaty perhaps, like maybe I need some grounding... I wish it happened more often.

[NightSpirit]

no probs :smile:

I understand what you're saying, but in earnest i ask you, are we meant to be in that state of euphoria more then we are grounded into life? We only get one bite of the cherry. Isn't that worth dealing more with what we have in front of us and allowing the rest to take care of itself as it sees fit?

[Adrienne]

I am not quite sure I understand your question. Are we only allowed for example, one moment to experience this - reaching beyond the veil ?

I have a feeling that once we experience this we want more experiences like this, I must confess, yes I do want more. I want to see my friend, I know they can appear but it takes a lot to do so, I want them to visit in a dream. There are times when I don't want to be grounded in reality here... I am not saying I want to give it up, like some who want to just leave the earth for whatever reasons. I just want both. I believe there is a reason we are still communicating, just couldn't tell you what the reason is. Probably very simply, he misses me ! :wink:

We only get one bite of the cherry. Isn't that worth dealing more with what we have in front of us and allowing the rest to take care of itself as it sees fit? not sure I understand this part ?

[NightSpirit]

I am not quite sure I understand your question. Are we only allowed for example, one moment to experience this - reaching beyond the veil ?

I have a feeling that once we experience this we want more experiences like this, I must confess, yes I do want more. I want to see my friend, I know they can appear but it takes a lot to do so, I want them to visit in a dream. There are times when I don't want to be grounded in reality here... I am not saying I want to give it up, like some who want to just leave the earth for whatever reasons. I believe there is a reason we are still communicating, just couldn't tell you what the reason is. Probably very simply, he misses me ! :wink:

[I]not sure I understand this part ?

Its really not for me to say it should be any particular way...that would be ignorant and arrogant of me to think i have the answers. I do believe we create our realities as we see fit to in each given moment. If this is your reality then so be it. Who am I to question it? Maybe its more that you miss him? Our human nature is to form attachments. We perceive and so there it is! Attachment is not just about collecting objects or persons...its also about everything we perceive as being solid in this world...eg...that's a wall, these are stairs, that's a vehicle.

As for 'one bite of the cherry'. I was referring to this life, this time round. There's only one DA aka DS lol...enjoy it in its fullest while you can...the rest will still be there when your time is done. :smile:

[Adrienne]

oh I am not suggesting you have the answers or that I have the answers, I am just saying how it is for me. Each person is different, and yes I do miss him too.

[NightSpirit]

oh I am not suggesting you have the answers or that I have the answers, I am just saying how it is for me. Each person is different, and yes I do miss him too.

Of course you do DA. We all miss our loved ones...Bless :hug3:

[Adrienne]

Bless you too NS ! :hug3:

[dennisoc]

My father passed 5 years ago and I was told by a spiritual medium (I have no yet amassed my own skills) (on two occasions that I sought assistance, I believe to try and find some peace with my grief), that he is always with me. He stays with me.

A mind body spirit therapist (friend) said to me just yesterday that it's I, who are not letting him go, that I am keeping him to me and that I ought to let him go "get over it" and let him go to the light. I am keeping him in my energy field.

I'm new to all of this and trying to understand why he hasn't gone "to the light". Once the departed go to the light, can they come back to Earth to visit us still?

I'm sorry if I'm not making sense.
That "holding back" thing is total ** from start to finish.
If anyone tells you that you could have any negative effect on those who have passed dismiss that and them.
Your loved ones have total freedom to see and hear you, thoughts included , anytime they wish.
Any injection of anything "fearful" about the afterlife is a myth in the making.

It ends in joy
den

[dennisoc]

A question ? How can we really be sure it's our relatives speaking to us ? Couldn't a malevolent spirit impersonate our loved ones ? And if the concept of reincarnation is correct shouldn't these souls have passed in another body or permanently joined the Light or whatever ? In this case who are we really communicate with ?

There is no such thing as a "malevolent spirit".
Except on TV and in religious myths.
Now for all the ..."yes buts" that wish to inject fear into the conversation. Dismiss it. The otherside is about LOVE.

it ends in joy
den

[Jeff4freedom]

Hey Dennisoc,
I'm not sure what you are referring to as the "other side"..

And to say it,"ends in Joy" is only partly correct,
and really not for all souls.

Near the final stage of the Death Experience there is the portion referred to as "going into the Light. I call it going to the White Hall because a stage of it is like that, like being in a huge white Hall with your group of allied souls....
This is joyful.

But before that there are all sorts of possibilities.
Some are not at all joyful.

Granted the Christians have thrown out a lot of mis-information about the process with their, "eternity in Heaven or Hell **....

But the reality is there are Heaven and Hell Realms.

And the Heaven realms are quite joyful,

but the Hell realms are not.

And most souls go through both realms in the process we refer to as death.

And there is more to the experience than the Heaven and Hell Realms.

It sounds to me that you don't have memory or experience in this process and are just relating your thoughts based probably on things you have read which resonated with what felt good to you.

But all the religions of the world,
even though most have ...distorted the truth,
didn't come up with Hell realms off the tops of their heads.

A lot of folks have explored and actually mapped the whole experience.
In Tibet the Science of Death.... was almost secondary to life, in fact for a lot the whole purpose of life was to prepare for the most beneficial death.

I was taught how to go through the process without actually cutting the cord....
Plus I have memories of quite a few deaths.
this gave me a lot of insights about the experience......

Once a human had evolved past the need to evolve.....
once in Life a person has escaped the Duality of good and bad, dark and light, fear and desire....
the "other side" as you call it would indeed simply be love.
Until then it is as varied as the experience in Life...
And sadly few live totally in Fearlessness and Love.

I believe you have a very deep fear of Death, so have devised for yourself a comfortable belief system that makes it easier for you to deal with this.
But delusion is for the Mainstream Religions and not an honest Spiritual Seeker.

There is nothing to fear, not even the Hell realms ....though they suck, they are as transitory as each of our individual lives.... just beads in a long string of pearls so to speak.

You don't have to be afraid,,

but don't quell those fears with ideas that have no basis in reality....

otherwise when your time comes....
and you face the Truth which is much different than your ideas about it...
it can make the experience more traumatic.

But here is a tip I learned.

If you focus ....totally focus your intention upon the Light.
don't get sidetracked by the Realms or anything else you see there....
Which is very difficult.... but not impossible.
You can go straight to the White Hall and get right down to setting up your next life...
without all the heaven and hell realms, or dealing with Constructs that ..... tend to overshadow the experience for most.

[dennisoc]

Yes I have read accounts from Kubler-Ross , George Anderson and lots of mediums, all experts on death, dying and the afterlife. I studied the scriptures and "holy" books of many religions. Experts on embellishment and embezzlement.
I have listened to countless dead people and guides talk directly to my wife, a world class medium.
A lot of fancy words which are salted with negativity and which "hint" at the existence of hell are subtle injections of fear into the joyful birth which is death.
There's nothing hard about it. Too many loved ones waiting that assist us with that.
If you have "a silver cord" it is of your own creation. None of the thousands of dead people I have heard accounts from mention it....except as another "construct" from a myth.
I love that you seem concerned about my "fears". I promise I won't buy any of yours which you subtely offer. Hopefully readers will take what they need and leave the rest....They are inspired to.

...and back to Ellespirit. Watching and helping our kids is heaven for a parent...both in body and especially out of body. Peace.

Walk in the sunshine
it ends in joy

den

[Jeff4freedom]

Delusions of Grandeur...

But whatever works for you

And of course the Dead folk you heard from didn't know about it....
it was severed....

they were dead.

But it's pretty basic stuff there dennisoc....

You can probably even Google it and get something...

But better to learn from experience and stop spouting what others say....

I hold little credence with regurged fear based info.

You like to act as though it is "others" who are fear based simply because they speak a truth that scares you...

Act as though,
"It's all Joy"...
on the other side..

That's just really sweet

fear based ****.


But then you are most comfortable with your head in the sand.


Like I said, all those concepts.... and truth that you fear.....

Really are not fearful

You don't have to imagine some fantasy La La land of denial...

Facing what is.....

really isn't that scary...

And is the only way we can grow.

Don't be afraid to grow.

Don't be afraid to step out of that La La land Box and see what really is...

it isn't really scary at all..

It's just what is...

Look into the fear....

You don't need a security blanket of Jive Concepts to protect you.

That's what religion is for....


"It ends in Joy"

Sounds like your running for office on some shallow Motto with no basis in Reality.

Yes, there is Joy,

But it's delusional to think that's all there is..



The Truth is far better.

I haven't read the folks mentioned...

I'm speaking from personal experience.....

If they are pushin fear...

They are jive

It is what it is....

The religions push fear...

I'm just sayin what is.....

If that scares you....

It's your fear....

I'm sayin there is nothing to Fear...


But there are Hell Realms..

And Heaven Realms....


Make no mistake about...

Even Livin in LA LA land won't change that Reality...

It's been that way sice Creation was formed..

Won't change just because it doesn't fit comfortably into your Little World.

It's Ends in Joy.....

Yes

But there is a lot between here....

and the End.

And the death process is not the End.....

And it's not all Joyful...

[dennisoc]

You make beautiful jewelry and have a lovely child.

...and I still say it ...this whatever it is ends in joy...and begins in joy too.

i'm out of this thread

later
den

[Jeff4freedom]

Thank you..

Yes, this ends and begins in Joy.

But Death is not the End

We die many times before we reach the "End"

[ellespirit]

Well thank you all for your comments and enlighitening knowledge. My whole journey began with my father as I watched him dying of cancer and crossing over between this world and the higher dimension. I'm sorry if i'm not using the right language I am still learning. However, it was one of the most amazing experiences of my life. He would talk to the others that were waiting for him in the higher dimension telling them "wait i'll be there soon" and then in the next breath be talking to us in the same room. With this experience began my appreciation and spiritual awakening.

Very difficult to not think of your father emotionally. I have blessed him with my heart and thanked him and tried to cut my "etheral cords" to him, with my heart telling him that he is "free" to go to the light that me and the boys are doing great, I dont' want to hold him to Earth.

On the other hand if he is still here in this/my construct(?) I also believe it's because he wants to be here, and doesn't want to let us go.

I hope I haven't contradicted myself and what I have written isn't contrary to what you all have written, but I am trying to understand. I appreciate and thank you for your indulgence.

Love and light
Elle

[dennisoc]

Well thank you all for your comments and enlighitening knowledge. My whole journey began with my father as I watched him dying of cancer and crossing over between this world and the higher dimension. I'm sorry if i'm not using the right language I am still learning. However, it was one of the most amazing experiences of my life. He would talk to the others that were waiting for him in the higher dimension telling them "wait i'll be there soon" and then in the next breath be talking to us in the same room. With this experience began my appreciation and spiritual awakening.

Very difficult to not think of your father emotionally. I have blessed him with my heart and thanked him and tried to cut my "etheral cords" to him, with my heart telling him that he is "free" to go to the light that me and the boys are doing great, I dont' want to hold him to Earth.

On the other hand if he is still here in this/my construct(?) I also believe it's because he wants to be here, and doesn't want to let us go.

I hope I haven't contradicted myself and what I have written isn't contrary to what you all have written, but I am trying to understand. I appreciate and thank you for your indulgence.

Love and light
Elle

Quite lovely
He will NEVER let you "go"
He doesn't have to.
Your eternally dancing together in love.

wage peace
den

[ellespirit]

Thank you Dennis, that's very comforting to know.

Love and light
Elle