Consciousness and T'ai Ji...

[Che Lazou]

I have done T'ai Ji Chuan on and off for most of my life. It seems I knew the principles and movements naturally since a child, so I sometimes wonder if I studied it in a past life, or downloaded it from the heavenly library in this life. At any rate, when I started at university aged eighteen, I began to take formal classes. Becoming conscious of the energy movements between people was one of the contributing factors to me having a mental breakdown. However I remained intrigued by the phenomena. I was studying mathematics at the time, another factor in my mental collapse, and both disciplines have remained part of my practice ever since. About ten years ago I began attending some classes that actively made use of energetic relationships between people without involving physical contact. The techniques were designed to move people about at a distance. Becoming conscious of this with my analytical mind became too much. I started to see and feel the manipulations and relationships everywhere, and being ruled by my brain, became overwhelmed and paranoid. I have since stopped the practice for my sanities sake. So my question is, are mathematics and T'ai Ji Chuan compatible? Of course I know they are, as everything is, but what practices do I need to do in order to integrate these two disciplines successfully, without going crazy? Thank you.

[sky]

I have done T'ai Ji Chuan on and off for most of my life. It seems I knew the principles and movements naturally since a child, so I sometimes wonder if I studied it in a past life, or downloaded it from the heavenly library in this life. At any rate, when I started at university aged eighteen, I began to take formal classes. Becoming conscious of the energy movements between people was one of the contributing factors to me having a mental breakdown. However I remained intrigued by the phenomena. I was studying mathematics at the time, another factor in my mental collapse, and both disciplines have remained part of my practice ever since. About ten years ago I began attending some classes that actively made use of energetic relationships between people without involving physical contact. The techniques were designed to move people about at a distance. Becoming conscious of this with my analytical mind became too much. I started to see and feel the manipulations and relationships everywhere, and being ruled by my brain, became overwhelmed and paranoid. I have since stopped the practice for my sanities sake. So my question is, are mathematics and T'ai Ji Chuan compatible? Of course I know they are, as everything is, but what practices do I need to do in order to integrate these two disciplines successfully, without going crazy? Thank you.



Why do you feel the need to intergrate them?

[Che Lazou]

Why do you feel the need to intergrate them?
That is a good question and I am still not sure how to answer it after some thought. The simple answer is because I want to be good at manipulating energy either for martial purposes or for healing purposes and I can't see a way of doing that without being conscious of it at an analytical level. What stops me from giving the simple answer is that I'm not sure that it represents a healthy desire, and I can, as I have been doing, go without pursuing such a skill. Letting the non-analytic part of me direct the manipulation of energy is probably the solution, however I don't want to loose the analytic skills that I have, which is why I ask about integration, however maybe being able to move between the two skill sets is the better approach? Thank you.