Choices and feelings

[Miss Hepburn]

Originally Posted by Miss Hepburn

Because of your name... Good luck coming in contact with someone from a past life relationship...

I just re read my post it doesn't even make sense to ME! I mean 'how' I said it was weird...
what I meant did not come across correctly.
I see why anyone would think this is a weird post. Embarrassing.
Very sorry.
This, luckily, is one of the lesser mistakes I have made in my life.
................................
Lemme say this stupid part better so it makes more sense...to everyone now!
''Because of your name... Good luck coming in contact with someone from a past life relationship... I have had many
passionate Loves... an ex spouse, lover, I have been in deep love with..and now if you are the same gender this life?
All I have to say is ...Good freaking luck.''

The *explanation of what I was going for:

For some reason the Twin Flame part of your name got me thinking of many lives with that person as a TF.
Probably sounded odd I went in that direction of past lives, I admit.

For me - in this life I have met spouses and lovers from Past Lives...and they have been female in this life as I am...
what a tough situation THAT is!!!
And that's why I said sometimes ya just have to recognize the feeling like a hot coal inside...cuz good luck
having that work out...When you are the same sex now -I mean when neither is gay.
I could go there, tho.

And of course, we are souls with no gender. I rem 3 lives vividly as a man.
It's hard when ya gotta control your heart - when you meet your wife from a past life now!
That's a tough one!

[JustBe]

Originally Posted by Same Sex twin flame27

I don't know why everyone is questioning my response and not questioning her belief. What she said was offensive and I'm not wrong for reacting. That's exactly why I stopped posting in this forum.

You can behave and take a stand in any way you choose, your reaction was much stronger than the post that offended you imo.

Your reaction also shows that it’s not just about this one post but a whole host of other posts previously that have offended you. Sometimes it pays to consider those things when going all out on one person.

[Gem]

Originally Posted by Same Sex twin flame27

Do people really believe that you "choose" how you feel? I have a hard time believing this. I believe we choose how we treat others. Not how we feel.

Not really. You feel how you feel.

When people say they choose how they feel, the process is like, you feel something, don't really like it, you do something to make a better feeling (eg what Starman said). If you simply sit there and feel, it happens by itself and no one chooses it or makes it happen. You just observe and know 'feels like this'.

Then, it loses its psychological/emotional content and only lives in the body. Most of us get the feeling in the body and react to it psychologically. The reaction also makes a feeling in the body, and then, what is just happening to you and what you are making happen all gets mixed together and becomes chaotic.

A good skill is to have a neutral centre so you can purely witness and discern between what happens spontaneously and what you generate yourself psychologically. Then you have clarity and understand the difference between what happens by itself and what you generate psychologically.

Your question is closed and simple: Control feelings or no? But reality is very nuanced and there isn't any actual logic such as, if no then not yes (if p then not q).

It's just when you ask a closed question people have to take the opposed positions it suggests, yes or no, so they latch on one or the other and think they are right. That opposition is inherent to the framing of the context.


I look at the question and see the dialectical problem. I understand limits of context, and sometimes there isn't a 'yes or no' answer. It's actually a discussion about what 'just happens' and what you 'make happen', which is a very deep topic indeed.

[Unseeking Seeker]

General observation: Reacting to a reaction by another is also our reaction

[Starman]

Same Sex Twin flame 27, you are not wrong by the way you reacted, but your question was about choosing your feelings, and I thought your exchange with Miss Hepburn was an opportunity to address choosing our feelings as displayed in this post. It was not my intent to pick on you.

I welcome you here to this forum, where there really is no right or wrong, there are just different opinions. I apologize if I am projecting my opinion on to you. I said earlier that angst and anger can be unhealthy but it can also be healthy, it can be cathartic as long as we control it and not let it control us. This is just another statement about choosing how we feel and not necessarily aimed at you.

Peace

[sky]

Originally Posted by Same Sex twin flame27

And I ask what are you doing on a "spiritual forum" when you are obviously homophobic? You belong in a religious forum. Your self righteous attitude towards the LGBTQ community is not spiritual.

Did you choose how you felt when you wrote the reply above ?

[Nikos1982]

Originally Posted by Same Sex twin flame27

Do people really believe that you "choose" how you feel? I have a hard time believing this. I believe we choose how we treat others. Not how we feel.

I agree with you (although there's much more on/to feeling than just how we relate to others)

...my take

[Redchic12]

SSTwinFlame…..”do people really believe you choose how you feel”

Personally I don’t feel anything is just black and white, yes or no. There is always a grey area.

I think that we DONT really choose our first reaction to something. I think it happens automatically (given our personality traits/life experiences) But I DO feel we choose HOW we are going to deal with that feeling.

Just my two bobs worth.

[Redchic12]

SSTwinFlame.

I’ve just reread what you wrote about Miss H being offensive but to be honest mate I can’t see anything offensive in her remarks.

Originally Posted by sky

Did you choose how you felt when you wrote the reply above ?

No I did not. I think my reaction to that was normal. I felt offended and validated my feelings by reacting.