Emotional Outbursts

[Starman]

Anatomy of a freak-out: adrenaline rush, scattered thoughts, maybe feeling threatened, or at risk, even if just for a moment not knowing what to do or how to react. Anger can also come in, as well as a feeling of retaliation or how to defend yourself.

What purpose does an emotional freak-out serve; mainly it may just be what psychology calls a catharsis, and a catharsis can be healthy, in my opinion, as long as we don’t stay there. Grieving often follows an emotional impact.

I am posting this here because some believe to be spiritual you control your emotions all the time. Spiritual people do not get upset; which in my opinion is false. Spiritually oriented people do not freak-out, in my opinion not true. Spiritually oriented people stay calm, cool, and collected, no matter what the situation. That is not my perspective.

Most people have an idealistic view of spirituality, and how a spiritual person is suppose to act, but we are still human beings with human frailties. I have seen gurus and other so-called spiritually advanced people lose their temper. In the Bible there is a story about how Jesus got upset in the market place. If we do not have an outlet for our emotions they will find their way out in other ways.

A lot of people are afraid of anger in others, but I believe that anger is okay; it is just a matter of what we do with it, or how we express our anger.

What do you think or feel about this?
What is your emotional outlet?

[Unseeking Seeker]

For me, it is cut and dry. A drop in awareness causes an outburst.

Awareness drops, we operate as of base mind-body instinct. This can give vent to rage, a sharp reaction, any primal, feral uprising. It serves a purpose though, reminding us that our mindfulness is stuporous. No judgment, just observation ~ we notice and accept the Tamas Guna at play (I assume everyone is familiar with the three Gunas, otherwise Wiki it)

[Redchic12]

Starman……. “ but I believe that anger is okay; it is just a matter of what we do with it, or how we express our anger.”

I have stated almost the same thing in another thread elsewhere on this forum. So yes agree with you.

Anger can also produce some positive results as well. Example: being angry with yourself for not dealing with another person very well, so in turn, you decide to look for better ways to deal with conflict in the future.

In my experience, I have seen unexpressed anger produce major health problems.

[Gem]

Not sure, but lets say that's one side of the story, like 'you're mad, that's understandable, it's OK'. Sorry my quip doesn't encapsulate the depth of your post, but I wanted to distill it into an everyday context.

However, temper and the host of negative reactions are very problematic, so even though 'it's understandable', it's no good if such distress is given a free reign.

The people who read psychology should like this because I figured something when I was meditating on retreat. You have to understand that a retreat is continuous meditation and I'm not taking about a meditation session as such, but during the period I became aware of deep seated rage, but it belonged to some version of me from long ago. I could feel it as rage, but at the same time, I was perfectly calm.

I realised from that. There are two kinds of anger. There's the reaction you are having now, and the type which is still latent from a long time ago. The latter type can be felt as rage but you aren't generating it now.

I think it's easy to get wrong impression from what I just said about expressing emotions, catharsis and what have you. It would be rational to think if I expressed the anger long ago at the time it happened, it wouldn't have got caught up in the first place, but in almost all cases, it's not a good idea to express your anger without restraint, and fortunately, emotions do not require expression.

I hope you aren't jumping to conclusions because this only gets more sublime. Even though it is better in almost all circumstances to not express negative reactions in behaviour (or at least have command over how you express them), not expressing or commanding expression of them isn't the same as repressing them. Repressing is trying to avoid the emotion by hiding it somewhere and pretending it's all fine. Then the thing sits in a dark cupboard and that bit of you is shut away, then you forget it's there.

We can't realistically just take 'it's understandable' as if no worries, it's all fine. We wouldn't encourage 'express it' in a DV situation, for example. We have to show restraint, and restraint is a wonderful attribute, but it's not to be confused with repression. They're not the same thing.

[Native spirit]

I am a spiritual person do I get Angry at times yes I do why because it is a human trait. doesn't matter how spiritual you are you are still Human
Anger can drive you to do things that you wouldn't normally do.


Namaste

[green1]

Originally Posted by Starman

A lot of people are afraid of anger in others, but I believe that anger is okay; it is just a matter of what we do with it, or how we express our anger.

When we are truly convinced that anger serves no purpose, anger fades away.

[Redchic12]

NativeS. Yes I feel much the same as you.

Gem. Yep that is a very good point about being two kinds of anger ie anger at someone who has betrayed you which does seem to linger and then anger at a car that pushes in front of you which doesn’t stay long.

I guess I’m lucky because I don’t get angry very often and never have but about 20 years ago I absolutely exploded!!! Not a pretty sight lol

[Starman]

No judgment, and definitely no diagnosis or assessment of those who are sharing here; to me that would be very superficial and un-called for.

The thing about anger is that we can be angry at someone and that person who you may be angry at is out on the beach enjoying themselves. So, in my opinion, the angry person suffers much more than the person they are angry at.
Is anger a healthy emotion? Depression usually follows anger, and depression is the number one mental disturbance in this world. It is the most widespread and prevalent mental instability which human beings have.

Spiritually we can rise above depression, and I can relate to what Gem was sharing about going to a spiritual retreat and immersing ourselves in meditation. I have often done that and it worked wonders for me.

I also go camping in the great outdoors, that serves me well emotionally. I know a Christian Minister who has season tickets to football games and he is a very calm person, but he goes to football games to scream and yell with the crowd, that is his emotional outlet. I think we all need an emotional outlet.

With the more meditation and centering I do, I do not react to emotional impacts as I once did. In general, life events effect different people differently; some people are labeled “drama queens or kings,” while others may wear their emotions on their sleeve so to speak.

In my opinion, we are spiritual beings inhabiting a human body, and I view emotionality as a realm similar to this physical realm; the four realms being physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. I do not see emotions in the classical sense of psychology, although I do accept that it is our central nervous system which accesses the realm of emotions. This is just my belief.

While our spiritual presence can heal us in all of the realms, and thus we can gain emotional and mental skill, just like gaining physical skills, it takes an inner alignment within ourselves to do such, in my opinion.

[Starman]

Historically, it was once believed that only females were emotional; men were seen as rational beings and woman were viewed as emotional beings. Lots of women have been told that they were too emotional, while men were told to “act like a man.” These are general characterizations.

But both males and females today are encouraged to be less intellectual and feel more from their gut. Compassion and sympathy are emotional feelings, and I believe that feeling is much more powerful than thought. Feeling is how we connect or disconnect in this world. But it is also important that we learn how to emotionally protect ourselves. That does not mean avoiding emotional situations; we can not learn how to have relationships by avoiding relationships.

Spiritual feelings, including intuition, are of a different quality than emotional feelings. I encourage others not to depress or ignore their emotions; what we push down inside of us will find its’ way into the outside world, often in an abrupt and ugly way. Appropriately expressing emotions in a non-threatening way, in my opinion, is healthy and necessary for further spiritual growth.

It is somewhat amusing to hear spiritual people justify weaknesses. Anger is the lack of self control…..an addiction of sorts…justify one thing and suddenly many things will be justified…