How Can I Make Relationship More Serious

Originally Posted by A human Being

It takes two to tango, the OP is just as responsible for the situation as her boyfriend is. You're making it sound like it's all his fault, and calling his behaviour 'abuse', as you did in an earlier post, isn't helpful.

It may come as a surprise but you, A Human Being and Altair, do not have monopoly on this thread as far as giving advice to the maker of this thread.

I have stayed out of your reply/business to the maker of the thread, but you have not stayed out of my replies to the maker of the thread which to me just shows of your lack of respect.

You don't see me or anyone here roaming about in other threads - or in this one - replying to others that has not even written to them in the first place, with the superior attitude that this "isn't helpful". How dare you? Really? What if any of the stuff you two have written isn't helpful? Ever thought about that? How would the two of you feel if other forum members would write that to you? Who do you think you are?

This is a forum. It is meant to have various forum members with different pespectives, ideas and thoughts - and you should learn to show some respect for them/us. The same respect I have showed the both of you, and everyone else who has written here.

I will use the word abuse as much as I want. You two shall not dictate what word I can use and what word I can not use. You don't have that power over me or anyone else here.

There is abuse in some relationships and one can then not say it is both fault, if one is doing it and the other is not, but the other who's not doing it, was either insecure/low selfesteem when entering the relationship or becoming so, and increasingly so because of the abuse- then you do not stand on equal ground. Then it isn't both faults. That is one taking advantage/abusing the partner, the situation.

Generally speaking to my experience people who has enough respect for others and themselves will not stand abusing, using their girlfriend/boyfriend's serious interest in them when they can't give the same in return, that is like kicking someone who is down. The only crimes the one who is down has committed is loving the other one more and not sticking up for itself.

I've been in the past seeing someone where I was the taker and this was someone I had loved very much in the past, but couldn't at the present time when seeing that person again, but that person still could.

The humanity in me was so that I could not stand myself having this other person string along in hope that I one day might change or for him to be satisfied with the little that I had to give in the meanwhile, and at the time I could not give more, and I wished to God I could have, but I couldn't. I was not there. As long as I was not there - I had no right to abuse him. And I had to be honest, that was the most respectful thing I could do, and say goodbye, let him go so that he could find someone that could give to him what I couldn't and what I knew he deserved.

And we all do deserve respect, by the way.

I would appreciate it if you don't write to me again. I stay out of your business, you stay out of mine.