Herion.

Please bare with me unconditionally.

Lately I've been having huge urges to try heroin. I'm not sure why. I want to put my body through a state of withdrawl, to see how my body will react, to see how I can handle it, to feel the reaction of the drug in my veins.

I had gone through a drug period long ago. I never touched that. I asked a heroin addict last time I was downtown and drunk out of nowhere after he gave me a smoke, what it is like. He told me he saw something in my eyes, to not ruin myself.


It feels like I want to put myself into a life theme of addiction or something, unnaturally.


What is wrong with me ?

Unconditionally?

when my friends would turn into heroin addicts I would write them off as dead sometimes. Heroin addicts die, and destroy every realtionship around them. If you are interested in hurting yourself, and everyone you know.... maybe you should seek help.

Maybe it sounds romantic to you?

why dont you just have a love affair with some jerk you can break up with>?


ugh

as i read your post, the face of a woman in a black bursa popped into my head and all i could see were the eyes. i do believe you are hiding yourself from something. whether that makes any sense to you or not this is what and how i felt. these drugs are not toys to play with, even people that have tried them for the very first time have overdosed and died.

i hope you reconsider your thoughts.

Read "The Shadow Effect by Deepak Chopra, Debbie Ford, and Marianne Williamson" .......

Heroin is a very tough way to cross......tobacco can be harder to cross, but it does not kill quite so quickly.

If you fall........
Get up QUICK!

If you fall again.....
Get up AGAIN!

If you fall 1,000 times......
GET UP 1,000 TIMES!

I Am a Master of ......
falling and getting up! lol~

Originally Posted by Bella

Please bare with me unconditionally.

Lately I've been having huge urges to try heroin. I'm not sure why. I want to put my body through a state of withdrawl, to see how my body will react, to see how I can handle it, to feel the reaction of the drug in my veins.

I had gone through a drug period long ago. I never touched that. I asked a heroin addict last time I was downtown and drunk out of nowhere after he gave me a smoke, what it is like. He told me he saw something in my eyes, to not ruin myself.


It feels like I want to put myself into a life theme of addiction or something, unnaturally.


What is wrong with me ?

There is that feeling to go to extremes...to do something that you dont know you can get out of, that tests your sprit.

What else are you afraid of? moreso than an addiction to a drug?

What if you loved unconditionmally....and got your heart broke because somebody else didnt want you unless they could control you? Could you stand alone...or would you run after them?

I feel really horrible for making this post and I wish there was a way to delete it please forgive me. I more or less understand what I was trying to capture inside of myself with these thoughts.

Originally Posted by xxheatherxx

There is that feeling to go to extremes...to do something that you dont know you can get out of, that tests your sprit.

What else are you afraid of? moreso than an addiction to a drug?

What if you loved unconditionmally....and got your heart broke because somebody else didnt want you unless they could control you? Could you stand alone...or would you run after them?

................ what do you mean exactly ................ ?
Somebody else didn't want you unless they could control you ....... what does that mean for that person ?? ....................... if they feel they have no control whatsoever on the other person ....... as if the other person has too much self awareness ect .. ?? ....... wow that just gave me a lot to ponder confused ......

Thank you .................................................. .................

Originally Posted by Bella

Please bare with me unconditionally.

Lately I've been having huge urges to try heroin. I'm not sure why. I want to put my body through a state of withdrawl, to see how my body will react, to see how I can handle it, to feel the reaction of the drug in my veins.

I had gone through a drug period long ago. I never touched that. I asked a heroin addict last time I was downtown and drunk out of nowhere after he gave me a smoke, what it is like. He told me he saw something in my eyes, to not ruin myself.


It feels like I want to put myself into a life theme of addiction or something, unnaturally.


What is wrong with me ?

what if this was your child saying this to you? what would you tell them?

Originally Posted by earthprowler

what if this was your child saying this to you? what would you tell them?

That is a very good way to perceive it to gain a bigger perspective on the emotional undercurrent ............


Again I'm sorry for making this post.

Originally Posted by Bella

Please bare with me unconditionally.

Lately I've been having huge urges to try heroin. I'm not sure why. I want to put my body through a state of withdrawl, to see how my body will react, to see how I can handle it, to feel the reaction of the drug in my veins.

I had gone through a drug period long ago. I never touched that. I asked a heroin addict last time I was downtown and drunk out of nowhere after he gave me a smoke, what it is like. He told me he saw something in my eyes, to not ruin myself.


It feels like I want to put myself into a life theme of addiction or something, unnaturally.


What is wrong with me ?

Bella this is the universe testing you to see if you have learned from your previous mistakes and whether you need to go through it all again. Wise up and know that you learned the first time that you are better without drugs and addiction.

People are often resistant to change but you have to remember that you are not the same person you were when you went through drug problems before and you will never be that person again. You have moved forward since then so keep moving forward and stop thinking about going backwards.

Find something new which you can focus on which takes you in a POSITIVE direction and forget this Heroin nonsense.

Good luck :)