Any sense in this? killed myself and paying back in a strange way?

Originally Posted by LivingSoul

Ever since I started meditating, a lot of my childhood memories started coming back to me.

I remembered as a little boy, I used take small rulers, or anything made of wood, and imagine that it's a knife/sword and imagine stabbing myself with it.

And as I am an insulin dependant diabetes, I need to constantly administer insulin using a penfill needle by piercing it to my tummy. One day, while giving myself the injection, a thought came to that that I've once killed myself.

Does this makes sense that having impaled myself in one of my incarnation, I'm now paying back as a diabetic? I wasn't born a diabetic, I got it at the age of 3, a juvenile diabetes.

Omg, it makes perfect sense to me!! I've been reading some back-to-life experiences of people who have commited suicide, and it was mentioned in some of these accounts where if the person remained out of the body too long and did not return-- some of them did have the option of reincarnating to fulfill the original mission God had for them before they interrupted that.

In the Heavenly realms you may have been given a choice as to how you could pay back the karmic debt of retaking your life- and you may have chosen the diabetes- but this memory of having been offered this choice was erased from your memory. Maybe if you go through regression hypnosis, you may relive that.

It was out of God's mercy for the welfare of your ultimate spiritual destiny that you have diabetes- accept and welcome it- it is helping your spirit more than you realize.

Originally Posted by LivingSoul

Ever since I started meditating, a lot of my childhood memories started coming back to me.

I remembered as a little boy, I used take small rulers, or anything made of wood, and imagine that it's a knife/sword and imagine stabbing myself with it.

And as I am an insulin dependant diabetes, I need to constantly administer insulin using a penfill needle by piercing it to my tummy. One day, while giving myself the injection, a thought came to that that I've once killed myself.

Does this makes sense that having impaled myself in one of my incarnation, I'm now paying back as a diabetic? I wasn't born a diabetic, I got it at the age of 3, a juvenile diabetes.

LivingSoul Hello~!

You meditate, that is your clue right there, to me. I find we answer our own questions, best. I think, if you think you may have killed yourself in another life-then that may be what happened. You can know that, through yourself. Everything is designed to bring your to yourself. Even our interactions with "others."

A good book to read is: Destiny of Souls by Micheal Newton(his first book is Journey of Souls and I recommend that book to be read too as each one holds a lot of information about souls and "life in between life.")

I am re-reading Destiny of Souls right now. I first read it years ago, but as my consciousness expands, old information holds new revelations I find. :)

It is not for me to say what you may or may have not done in previous lives but I do know it would not be for punishment, from my perspective of the All.

Everything is to be a learning experience. We are all loved unconditionally by the Universe/Creator. From my perspective of the All.

I agree with GentleStrength who says: I think this is right on. Sometimes we learn through doing something and then figuring out afterwards, "You know what? I didn't really like that and don't want to do it again".

Exactly.

Blessings to you LivingSoul. Thank you for sharing. As we share, we all learn and grow. ~Namaste