Why spiritual life is so truthful

[Gem]

I think if we are really honest about our thoughts and beliefs, and not take them for granted, we'll be surprised that we don't really believe 1/2 the things we think we do. We will also be surprised at things we do believe in which we think we don't.

I was 19 when I lost my religion. I was brought up Christian, and all the adults seemed so sure that I started to rely on it as something true. When I was 19 I didn't even realise I was a believer. I didn't go to church or pray or anything like that, and I lived as if I didn't believe, but deeper down I was deeply convinced that God was a 'person' and Jesus was gonna save us. It was only when I lost the religion that I realised I still had these deep seated beliefs.

I lost it suddenly. All at once. It was instantaneous. I still remember the night. In a flash the belief was seen as untrue. The problem was, there was nothing to replace it, so not only did I lose the belief, but the very substructure which is belief.

People who were never religious and people who are still religious wont understand how devastating that is, but everything you lean on and hope for, and that perfect person who you can always turn to, who supposedly loves you, who is ultimately your only hope, is gone. But suddenly knew it was all the things I was told - an imagined paradigm which I took-to-be-true.

I was living a lie on more that one level back then, and because I had long since replaced being true to myself with a false God story, I suffered the consequence of being deeply untruthful. I don't complain. It was hard and I lost my mind over it, but it's the best thing that ever happened. If I was still in the comfort of that delusion I'd be happier, but I don't need faith, and I don't need to know anything to be truthful.

To the religious people reading this; I'm not implying you need to dump your religious beliefs. This is just how I lost it. I understand well how losing religion can be traumatic, but accept the truth because the truth is worth it, and don't be apathetic about falling too easily into that comfort which is bondage.

Over to you.