Recognition vs function

[Ewwerrin]

Originally Posted by Unseeking Seeker

@ Ewwerrin ~ we are...
...by the environment.

I've had moments in my life where I felt this unconditional love as light/emmenation all around me. But I cannot reproduce that. No matter how much I remain still. Mind acitivities just arise and fall away and I feel dull. Especially if I remain still for too long, the mind activity becomes disturbing. Untill I am forced to activate. Do something.

[Unseeking Seeker]

@ Ewwerrin ~ in the earth experience, we are so used to striving & struggling to exist, to fulfil our objectives, that is seems to be totally irrational to ‘attain by doing nothing’ or we may say, ‘be still and allow our becoming’.

From the materialist’s view such a stance is phlegmatic, defeatist, escapist. However, that’s the way it is. All that needs to be done is to come undone, to relinquish all imagined knowing, to drop all identity based agendas and simply abide in thought rested awareness, self-aware.

[Ewwerrin]

Originally Posted by Unseeking Seeker

@ Ewwerrin ~ in the...
... thought rested awareness, self-aware.

I want to rest in self awareness. In awareness of my awareness. SO MUCH! But I cant stabilize it. It always turns into a thought. I cannot focus. It requires so much effort to focus my awareness on my awareness, that it backfires with endless tormenting visions of effort and struggle and strive.

I wish I could do it! How can I do it?

[Unseeking Seeker]

@ Ewwerrin ~ release fear & desire, rooted in attachment simply by looking at the stirring as of foreign origin.

Or from the Buddhist perspective, notice that these stirrings come to mind-body, which we are not.

Or from the Tantric ideology, celebrate each impulse, surrendering it to Shiva*(*God), who is the enjoyer of each rising and subsiding.

These are the suggestions I can offer.

Our outer life must be in alignment with the inner. There’s no point mediating or praying for a while and then employing thought, word or deed in opposition to love. In other words, inner conflict must end. Head must meld with heart in resonance with love.

[Ewwerrin]

Originally Posted by Unseeking Seeker

@ Ewwerrin ~ release...
.... in resonance with love.

Sorry, I cant make any sense of it. But I appreciate your attempt to help or give advice. I just don't know what I can do for myself anymore.

[iamthat]

Originally Posted by Ewwerrin

I want to rest in self awareness. In awareness of my awareness. SO MUCH! But I cant stabilize it. It always turns into a thought. I cannot focus. It requires so much effort to focus my awareness on my awareness, that it backfires with endless tormenting visions of effort and struggle and strive.

Maybe embrace the simplicity of Ramana Maharshi:

If you go the way of your thoughts you will be carried away by them and you will find yourself in an endless maze.

Trace every thought back to its origin. Never allow thought to run on. If you do, it will be unending. Take it back to its starting place and the mind will die of inaction.

The mind is only a bundle of thoughts. The mind functions on account of a single root thought, the "I"-thought. When one turns within and searches whence this "I"-thought arises, the "I" vanishes.

We experience the mind as one thought after another. Each thought arises out of nothing and dissolves back into nothing. Find that space between the end of one thought and the start of the next thought. Rest in that space. Try to prevent the next thought from arising. With practice the space between thoughts becomes longer. Let go of the struggle to be aware of awareness and just rest in the silent space between two thoughts.

Peace

[Ewwerrin]

Originally Posted by iamthat

Maybe...
... two thoughts.
Peace

Thanks so much for your help. I wish I could find that emptiness stillness nothingness. And stay there. The thoughts always keep coming. In deep sleep I have that stilness, but I cannot prevent myself from waking up. As soon as I wake up, the "I" arises with all of its experiences and reactions. It would be so wonderful if that no longer happened. If I could wake up from deep sleep and still remain in that peaceful deep sleep nothingness state of being. I just dont know how.

Looking for the origin of thought/I. I have done that for years. That also becomes an endless maze.

[iamthat]

Originally Posted by Ewwerrin

I wish I could find that emptiness stillness nothingness. And stay there. The thoughts always keep coming.

This is the challenge we all face. The mind with all its thoughts is a useful servant but a terrible master.

Patanjali's second sutra states: Yoga is the stilling of the fluctuations of the mind.

There have been countless volumes written about Yoga but it all comes down to this one sentence.

And it requires that we are fully present in this moment. And the next moment. And the moment after that. If we are not fully present then we get distracted by some memory of the past or an imagination about the future. But it gets easier with practice. Because if we do not give energy to our thoughts then they naturally fade away.

But we may discover that deep down we have a subtle attachment to thinking. We are so accustomed to the internal monologue, that inner voice, that it feels strange when it is not present.

In The Untethered Soul Michael Singer calls this inner voice the inner roommate. Imagine actually living with a roommate who speaks to us non-stop, commenting on everything, going off at tangents, often criticising our actions and calling us names, and basically never shuts up. How long would we put up with such a person? Not very long. And yet we accept having such a voice in our head every minute of every day!

In the end we each have to deal with our own thoughts, our own inner roommate. Beginning in this moment. Otherwise they will never end.

Peace

[saurab]

Originally Posted by Unseeking Seeker

@ Ewwerrin ~ we are not this mind body. Who are we then? We are living light, a soul, in occupation of this form. How may we know this assertion to be true? Just be still. As long as we’re twirled about by fears & desires, senses externalised, we are, let us say, hypnotised by the environment.

what happens when you come out of your stillness ? you come face to face with your body and mind. no one can remain still forever. what does that mean ? That the mind and body are also the truth about what you are. some people talk about what you "really are". But when they cannot remain still forever, then it is obvious that the mind is an essential part of what they are.

Did you think God made this world to be dumb and deaf (which is what people call stillness)?

[Unseeking Seeker]

@ Saurab ~ there is a difference between experiencing or let us say imbibing something and assimilating it. Just like a classroom; we learn and relearn the lessons repeatedly until it is firmly etched within. Spiritual experiences are no different. First we are offered an experience and then repeated immersion embodies the wisdom garnered within.

Mind is an instrument. It is quite possible to remain in a continuum of thought rested awareness whilst yet fully functional in the world. The way we function, the responses we offer however, that shifts.