When tf has done that is unreversable

[Impulsv]

In reading airdogs thread his situation regarding tf not being there when things got tough n he needed her. I just realized that tf might not be the man for me or that I may not forget his actions. U see I was married for 8 year it was all ok until I had cancer n exhusband left. I swore that I can not be with a man who will leave when things get tough. In thinking about tf n his behavior this man has left, wether his running is or is not bacause hes at tf, the thing is his history has shown him unreliable.I have Accepted that perhaps were are not meant to be as lover as I cant be with someone who will walk out on me when things get tough. It's a painful realization. Perhaps his wasn't as serious as walking out when UR ill. But he walked out on the most minor disagreement which brings serious concerns for me. This feelings have been brought up recently perhaps to make me realize to accept what is n that he will not make a good lover for me n maybe meant for freindship.
What are your thought do you thinks its possible to forgive n forget?

But maybe it's meant to touch on the abandonment issue.

Originally Posted by Impulsv

What are your thought do you thinks its possible to forgive n forget?

But maybe it's meant to touch on the abandonment issue.

I have forgiven people, but I don't know how to forget what caused me great pain. I forgave my husband 4-5 times for offenses done to me. The pain is still there right now because I really loved him. I can no longer be in a romantic/emotional relationship with him because his repeated actions killed it. TF has caused me some pain as well from blocking me and running and so forth. However, I can't judge him as far as a relationship is concerned because we have never actually been "committed" as lovers or married. So, my perceived hurt from him I just toss it aside as best I can.

I think we hold our twins way too responsible for our hurt when there really is no committment established. Unless twins have said "I do" to any terms of a defined committed relationship, we should not hold them accountable for their crazy actions. lol

[Impulsv]

Tf n I were romantically together for three months. When he ended out of one minor argument. But the truth is I can't ignore my tf may not be capable of giving me what I need. You see he said something important i cant brush off.He hinted at having aspbergers(very high functioning I'd say genius.) Everything It's so clear now how he get emotional overwhelmed n can't have emotional discussions. But I also see how he's been misunderstood most of his life.

He wasn't lying when he said that's what I can give you. I've tried to learn as much about it since I recently recalled that conversation. I still love him it changes nothing just that I is not meant to be romantic perhaps.