Develope compassion ?

[inavalan]

Originally Posted by Starman

In my opinion compassion is more about feeling then doing. Doing too much for a person may not allow that person to learn how to do for themselves. I subscribe to the adage; give a man a fish and you feed him for a day, teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime. Which one of these are more compassionate.

Compassion is not about making others dependant on us. I worked in the professional helping field for more than 4-decades, and I had to learn how to serve. There were times when it was felt as service to others, and times when it just felt like work. It was all in the attitude which I had. The opposite of compassion is indifference, uncaring, or apathy.

Empathy is more than just seeing things from another person’s perspective, compassion comes when we have a deep sense of empathy. Sympathy is when we are sorry about what another person is going through. But telling another person that you are sorry does not necessarily lead to compassion. Compassion is genuine caring, or trying to care for another person’s inner life.

Compassion is often seen as something that we do for a person externally, and those type of gestures can be compassionate, but when we are bathing in our own deeper spiritual presence, a softness comes over us, and compassion comes naturally. Because we see, and feel, that person, or people, as ourselves and there is no separateness or individuality.

Can you have compassion for a sex offender, murderer, child molester, or other person who maybe offended you or someone else? When I was working on my Masters in Social Work one of my professors said that we should also have compassion for the well off and rich, because most people only have compassion for the poor, those who are in pain or struggling. She would say that the rich and well off need compassion also. In my opinion compassion is a spiritual quality; it is inherent in the fabric of pure divine spirit.

Interesting read.

[Ciona]

Originally Posted by ocean breeze

If i realized i lacked compassion or empathy in me i wouldn't do anything. I wouldn't see it as something wrong that needs to be made right. That's looking at things from a childish perspective.

Not necessarily childish. There are sociopaths who have viewed their own brain scans proving their lack of empathy and compassion who deliberately challenge themselves because they understand ethical and world issues from the standpoint of their intellect even if they can't feel anything in that regard.

[inavalan]

Compassion is nice, just don't wallow in it.

[Miss Hepburn]

Originally Posted by deepdip

If you realise you lack compassion, how would you try to develop it in you ?

Don't be concerned ....hahahahha...the Universe will make sure you learn how
to be compassionate, my friend.
Buckle up, it's gonna be a bumpy ride.


PS -asking for humility is way, way worse....might as well put on a helmet for that one.
( I know this topic intimately.)

[ocean breeze]

Originally Posted by Ciona

Not necessarily childish. There are sociopaths who have viewed their own brain scans proving their lack of empathy and compassion who deliberately challenge themselves because they understand ethical and world issues from the standpoint of their intellect even if they can't feel anything in that regard.

A person who lacks compassion and empathy can still understand right from wrong. I feel we are in agreement here.

Perhaps we see things differently in that i feel change is completely unnecessary unless there is a strong desire to cause harm to others or themselves.

It seems like the spiritual community deep down sees compassion as good and uncaring as bad. Empathy as right and apathy as wrong. Humility as a positive trait and arrogance as a negative trait. I feel there is always going to be this internal and external divide as long as a person feels this way. Perhaps one day we will live in a world where we can embrace and accept both these "polar opposites" in ourselves and others.

[inavalan]

Originally Posted by ocean breeze

A person who lacks compassion and empathy can still understand right from wrong. I feel we are in agreement here.

Perhaps we see things differently in that i feel change is completely unnecessary unless there is a strong desire to cause harm to others or themselves.

It seems like the spiritual community deep down sees compassion as good and uncaring as bad. Empathy as right and apathy as wrong. Humility as a positive trait and arrogance as a negative trait. I feel there is always going to be this internal and external divide as long as a person feels this way. Perhaps one day we will live in a world where we can embrace and accept both these "polar opposites" in ourselves and others.

Labels .. .

[ocean breeze]

^^ Yep and its amazing how much importance and attachment we place on them. People are willing to die for their labels.

I am spiritual, i am a mother, i belong to this race and this nation, and so on and so on.

[deepdip]

Thank to each one of you for your comment !

[Ciona]

Originally Posted by ocean breeze

A person who lacks compassion and empathy can still understand right from wrong. I feel we are in agreement here.

Nods

Perhaps we see things differently in that i feel change is completely unnecessary unless there is a strong desire to cause harm to others or themselves.

If by unnecessary you mean someone who explores developing this trait in themselves is doing it from a place of desperation and non-acceptance of the facts as they are along with childish wishful thinking, I would agree with you there and indeed would add it might even be harmful. This is how I originally took your comment when I responded to it but I may not have understood. I simply wished to cite another instance.

This scenario being possible, speaking of polarities, the opposite scenario is also true. There's always the other person who has repressed their empathetic feelings or squashed them due to trauma and has gone numb and/or developed their intellect as a way of not facing their feelings. They are actually empathetic deep down, but are now out of touch with their authentic self and 'think' they haven't much or any. So I would posit if we can agree being healthy and authentic are 'good', then for that individual the exploration is quite 'necessary'. It certainly isn't 'wrong' for them to explore themselves, no?

I'm just looking at other scenarios. The OP didn't really give any personal information except for a bit further down.

It seems like the spiritual communit
y deep down sees compassion as good and uncaring as bad. Empathy as right and apathy as wrong. Humility as a positive trait and arrogance as a negative trait. I feel there is always going to be this internal and external divide as long as a person feels this way.

I agree with you that people in general tend to do this. My experience with the spiritual community has been the opposite in that most of the people I have known in it have encouraged me and helped me to face polarities, much more so than the people outside of it. Perhaps I'm lucky that way. In any event my contacts in the spiritual community exist far beyond this forum to all walks of life, so that may be part of it. You yourself have helped me to face polarities, even when you haven't known it.

Perhaps one day we will live in a world where we can embrace and accept both these "polar opposites" in ourselves and others.

Perhaps

[inavalan]

Originally Posted by ocean breeze

^^ Yep and its amazing how much importance and attachment we place on them. People are willing to die for their labels.

I am spiritual, i am a mother, i belong to this race and this nation, and so on and so on.

That's why we fell from Paradise ... :) A little intellect made the man arrogant, and forgot why he's here now.