The Spiritual Root of Cheating

Intermixing of male and female qualities at the spiritual level leads to cheating, betrayal and sexual deviations in our world.

Certainly, no one likes being cheated on. But as much as we'd like to write this unfortunate phenomenon off as "purely animalistic behavior," in fact there is a spiritual root behind it because every phenomenon in our world must also exist in the spiritual world. So what is this spiritual root or reason for our cheating? In Kabbalah, it's called "the breaking of the vessels."

This means that once, we were all united in one common soul, but then this common soul broke into many parts. This "breaking of the vessels" caused all the parts to become integrated in one other, and as a result, each broken part now contains a female part and a male part. Hence, the male parts contain female parts and vice versa. We even have each other's hormones!

This intermixing of our qualities is not only the cause of cheating and betrayal, but also of all the sexual deviations in our world, such as homosexuality and deviant sexual identity. And these phenomena are evident in our times more than ever before because we've arrived at the "lowest level" of discerning the breaking of the vessels.

The male and female parts do not see exactly how they should interact with one another. In the ideal, spiritual state, the male and female parts are positioned one against the other - the man opposite the woman. However, in our state - after the souls broke, descended and became intermixed with one another - each one took on qualities that belong to others. This is why we desire different kinds of pleasure from different sources.

However, if we rise above our search for these different pleasures and aspire for spiritual pleasure, then we will see who is our true partner on the spiritual path. This brings us to the famous verse, "Man, woman, and the Divine Presence between them." If one's greatest value in life is spirituality, then he (or she) will find the right partner in life, his "other half" who will be together with him on the spiritual path. And together, they will attain adhesion with the Creator.

In the meantime this may sound utopian because in our current reality it is difficult for us to see and understand how it can really happen. But as we continue advancing toward correction and spirituality, we will understand this more and build a good future filled with trust and loyalty.

[Kiran]

Originally Posted by yonex83

However, if we rise above our search for these different pleasures and aspire for spiritual pleasure, then we will see who is our true partner on the spiritual path. This brings us to the famous verse, "Man, woman, and the Divine Presence between them." If one's greatest value in life is spirituality, then he (or she) will find the right partner in life, his "other half" who will be together with him on the spiritual path. And together, they will attain adhesion with the Creator.

This sounds nice, BUT: so you say someone being single cannot advance on the spiritual path? He/She has necessarily to find a partner to "attain adhesion with the Creator"?

[Perspective]

My perspective is constantly changing, but a friend explained relationships (esp. marriage) in a way that made sense...

Spiritually - wedding ceremonies, certificates & honeymoons don't mean much.
What is most meaningful spiritually, is intent, feeling & resonating/connecting.
When 2 people get married, spiritually, it's mostly about intent & maybe superficial connection ("infatuation") but no real "spiritual union" yet.
As they learn to live together, through good & bad times, there may be some character development that they help each other with...
But regarding "spiritual relationships" - connection or "relating" is most significant.

Nobody "owns" anybody, although most marriage seems to usually influence belief otherwise.
Spiritually, it's all about connection... & what is a little conflicting to me - is how we each change, so it's likely we'll relate or connect with different people throughout our lives.
So, we may relate with someone who we're not married to.
Yet, we want to do what is best for all (LOVE)... which is often keeping a family together by staying "loyal" at least in action.

To be fair, this particular philosophy clearly values "not-cheating" over spirituality.

Especially since it suggests that our spiritual make up is what creates the desire to cheat.

[Verunia]

Very interesting post, at first I thought I would disagree with it but reading further into it I found myself understanding what you're saying.

Although I don't think cheating has a direct spiritual rooting. We have been influenced by our social environments and our upbringing when it comes to sex, which is as far from anything 'spiritual' in my opinion; but I believe when we look inside ourselves and truly become acquainted with our selves, we are ready for a committed relationship with whomever life leads us to.

You lost all credibility when you tried to say that homosexuality and other forms of sexuality are deviations. That's not very holistic of you. So-called "deviant" behaviour has been the norm since the dawn of human history. Maybe you've been raised with a different social upbringing that contradicts that, but that doesn't change historical reality.

You went one step further though. You blamed other sexual orientations for being one of the causes of modern degeneration of human sexuality, and you also state that these "deviant" sexualities have never been as apparent as they are now. That is patently false and completely absurd on MULTIPLE levels.

Please do a basic google search on homosexuality:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LGBT_history

Here is a brief history of it. It spans all of our recorded time line. Just because it got suppressed in our 1950's fascist social conservativism, it has never been taught in mainstream education, and it is only visibly re-emerging for the U.S. within the past 50 years, does not mean we are at its peak now. All that means it that it has gone from invisible (i.e. behind closed doors, where it was indeed just as widespread) to visible again. The peak of ACCEPTANCE happened a long time ago in societies for whom it was never an issue... and that mostly predates the abrahamic faiths, and in particular the endorsement of Christianity by Constantine. If only he had stuck with Paganism, we might not have had to suffer through the Dark Ages... sigh...

Beyond that ridiculous claim, boiling it all down to neat and tidy sexual divisions only based on who has a penis and who has a vagina is vulgar to me. Gender and sexuality are way more complicated than that. Gender identity occurs in the brain - that is to say, psychologically - and not in your genitalia; hence we see people who are born who identify as different things all over the spectrum. Even the terms "gay" and "straight" are misnomers. There are few people who are truly 100% either. "Sex" and "gender" are two completely different things.

Please... next time do some basic research. I enjoy hearing people's pet theories, but not when they are as convoluted as yours.

In fact, using the logic offered in this post, (that we are spiritually built with an inherent desire for many and different types of sexual experiences,) then a person would have an easier time arguing that heterosexual monogamy the true deviant lifestyle.

There are actually numerous flaws to the logic here. Unfortunately, too many people just buy into prescribed morality without any critical thought whatsoever.

[SeaZen]

Originally Posted by yonex83

However, if we rise above our search for these different pleasures and aspire for spiritual pleasure, then we will see who is our true partner on the spiritual path. This brings us to the famous verse, "Man, woman, and the Divine Presence between them." If one's greatest value in life is spirituality, then he (or she) will find the right partner in life, his "other half" who will be together with him on the spiritual path. And together, they will attain adhesion with the Creator.

In the meantime this may sound utopian because in our current reality it is difficult for us to see and understand how it can really happen. But as we continue advancing toward correction and spirituality, we will understand this more and build a good future filled with trust and loyalty.

"Cheating" and all it entails is a moralistic man made concept as is your explanation for "cheating" IMO. You assume that the more spiritual we become the more monogamous we become. How can you prove this? .

Who are you to say that lifetime monogamous coupling will happen when one is highly spiritual but several partners over a lifetime cannot? Where does that leave our very young adults who wish to happily experiment with sex WITHOUT the burden of a lifetime monogamous committment? What is the basis for for what you say? This sounds like a lot of religious monogamous doctrine repackaged in shiny new age phraseology to me. IMO this is hogwash and is operating from your current level of awareness and spirituality.

Current earthly concepts of love and coupling are currently operating on the model of needy conditional monogamous love of one partner and to have sex with another is "cheating" and "betrayal" (both negative concepts).

Could it be that at some point in the future highly spiritual couples can reach a happy agreement when they both know that their paths are no longer the same and separate with good wishes, intentions and postitivity towards the other? Would that somehow make them less spiritually evolved than the monogamous couple? I THINK NOT!

[desotophil]

It appears to me that most of us tend to try to fit our conclusions into our belief/value systems. That's to be expected whether they be rooted in enlightenment or training. Few of us ever reach a maturity that allows us to intellectually perceive spiritual reality.

I believe we are too limited in our definitions of love and connections. Spiritually, love is unlimited and is a product of assignment within broader and more complex realities. We are all purpose driven and there are those in this life that are assigned to share our purpose. Being connected means we bring distinctive giftings to each other in those encounters. Each encounter is truly love but distinctly different in it's purpose.

Sometimes love is for the moment and serves it's purpose in that moment, sometimes for a time and perhaps many tasks, some love lasts a lifetime or perhaps bridges many lives. All love is profound and lifechanging and if not acknowledged leaves a void.

The modern misconception is that sharing love in it's true form with one person steals the love we share with others. I don't believe our shared assignments are limited to "the one". I also believe our norms guide us into uninformed commitments and therefore give rise to "cheating" either on the commitments or the connections we are meant to serve.

[Perspective]

TheDivine,
Homosexuality is a hot topic & Yonex briefly mentioned it on the side - speaking of deviations, which is correct. The history of homosexuality is irrelevant. If homosexuality was the norm (as oposed to deviation) you & I would not be here, since we are a product of an egg (from a woman) & a sperm (from a man). Anatomy also is obvious: a penis fits into a vagina, not into another penis, nor does a vagina fit with another vagina. I understand people experience homosexual feelings & orientation, for various reasons, but it is a deviation from nature.
But how many other deviations are there! We all "deviate" in some ways. So, in that way, I believe someone with homosexual orientation isn't that "deviated."

Desotophil,
I agree. And I'm so happy to hear about intellectualy understanding spirituality! Thought is not the enemy of spirituality, it's part of us...& this Spiritual forum is filled with thoughts!
I like what you mentioned, "Each encounter is truly love but distinctly different in it's purpose."
I also agree that there are many people we can love & connect deeply with. I'm not sure if I'm the only one who ties emotional intimacy with romance, or if all do.
There's an intuitive aspect in discovering how best to love. Although feelings from thoughts & hormones direct otherwise, I believe doing what's best for all (especially in keeping a family together) usually involves being loyal to a spouse, sexually.