I had a good sit-down with an ordained...

...soryo (Tendai lineage) and he gave me two important pieces of advice.

1 - Do not discontinue practice regardless of whatever I'm experience, either positive or negative. Many of you have already provided that advice and point well taken. Thank you!

2 - Be ever vigilant of ego and especially if it's seemingly well under control. In fact that's the most crucial time because it could be working undercover in the subconscious and I might not have the experience to recognize it.

Question: Has anyone encountered the situation of after having a profound experience that ego works silently behind the scenes and then re-emerges at some later date and with a vengeance? If so how was it handled?

[JustBe]

In my experience everything that opens provides awareness to move through to the next stage of ones process. Meaning you gain the tools of awareness to manage what comes next. If something rears it’s head with a force to reckon with, you’ll either be in it and strike gold or be in it and have more to let go of. How you do it depends on whether it comes through life or you just move through it as a meditation practice that lifts the lid on it and you sit with it and let it all go.

I don’t worry about ego, but I am very mindful of ignorance that can’t see itself. If you can’t see yourself in it, something will show you. It pays to self reflect mindfully. Be very open, honest and not be afraid to see and notice your deeper containment.

There are points of control where people self sabotage. I’ve found them in myself. It’s subtle stuff that works in subtle indirect ways. Often points where you don’t want to be wrong. You don’t want to make mistakes. You don’t want to look like a fool. You can’t be vulnerable and weak. That last one is often a predominate male containment. They bolster up in being strong and tough because men are often conditioned this way,so as they are not seen as a wimp or weak. Sad but true.

[Starman]

JustASimpleGuy, thank you for sharing. It seems you got something from that meeting. Different traditions emphasize different things in spiritual development. I feel like Christianity emphasizes sacrifice while Buddhism emphasizes compassion, etc. Of course they are more than just about that. I am not a big fan of ego psychology or ego philosophy. I am not concerned about my ego but I do put a lot of emphasis on being humble. I embrace that I should never discontinue my meditation practice. Many years ago I asked a guru in India when should I stop doing meditation. This guru replied, when all you see is divine light everywhere, all you hear are celestial music, all you taste is divine nectar, and all you feel is that primordial vibration filling your being in absolute silence. Then you can stop doing meditation.

From the Upanishads:

“The five major destructive perversions of the human mind; their Sanskrit name with English explanations, are listed below. They can not take root in you unless invited in; self-indulgence allows all of these to occupy humanity. .

KAM = Passion allowed to run into lust, and abnormal demand. We grow like that which we contemplate. Kam binds us to the animal plane.

KROFT = Anger and hate. A mental carcinoma. Anger causes confusion to scatter the mind from the center. Slander, fault finding, jealousy, destructive criticism, etc. are the “pups” of anger. Never criticize, find fault, abuse or blame anyone. When you speak ask yourself, is it true, necessary, and kind.

LOFT = Greed. This binds us to the mineral plane, lower than the animal plane, and creates a God of gold and silver for us. While Kam degrades us, Kroft consumes us, and Loft hardens us.

MOFT = Undo attachment to things. This will use up your time on earth and take you away from higher affairs. It makes you a slave to the lower planes. The liberation of the soul is what you are here for, nothing else matters. Moft will keep you from this freedom.

AHANKAR = Vanity or egoism. Ahankar grows on the action of the other four perversions. Vanity operates with boasting long after the other four perversions have died. It is the source of error in humanity; it loudly says I am right and all others are wrong. The only thing worth doing in this life is to find a compatible spiritual path and walk in it.”

Originally Posted by JustBe

In my experience everything that opens provides awareness to move through to the next stage of ones process. Meaning you gain the tools of awareness to manage what comes next. If something rears it’s head with a force to reckon with, you’ll either be in it and strike gold or be in it and have more to let go of. How you do it depends on whether it comes through life or you just move through it as a meditation practice that lifts the lid on it and you sit with it and let it all go.

I don’t worry about ego, but I am very mindful of ignorance that can’t see itself. If you can’t see yourself in it, something will show you. It pays to self reflect mindfully. Be very open, honest and not be afraid to see and notice your deeper containment.

There are points of control where people self sabotage. I’ve found them in myself. It’s subtle stuff that works in subtle indirect ways. Often points where you don’t want to be wrong. You don’t want to make mistakes. You don’t want to look like a fool. You can’t be vulnerable and weak. That last one is often a predominate male containment. They bolster up in being strong and tough because men are often conditioned this way,so as they are not seen as a wimp or weak. Sad but true.

I think you hit one of the nails right on the head? One of the reasons I wanted advice is my recent experience implanted a burning desire to share, not necessarily my experience and I've played that particular card close to my vest, only sharing here, with one close friend and now with this gentleman. There's a desire to share the path that worked for me but in a very subtle way and without the background or experiences. Pretty much meditation and in a secular context. My dad always told me when wanting to get something done outside of my realm of expertise or competance to either get a professional or at least seek professional advice.

One of my thoughts was to establish a meditation meetup group, but I was concerned that might be a bad idea because I'm probably not qualified to guide beginners and wouldn't recognize danger signs in those not suited to meditation, but I never considered the potential pitfalls for me.

In addition to discussing it being desirable to be able to detect warning signs of the instructed going in a bad direction and without directly addressing me, he talked about two common vulnerability points, motivation and reaction to adulation and how either could sabotage my experience.

He was planting a seed and waiting for my reaction, and upon a few moments of reflection I got the point and thanked him. When I got home and after my evening sitting I reflected more deeply on this and perhaps saw a tiny seed of ego or ignorance (unawareness) thereof concerning my motivation.

I was a little disturbed by that but upon a good night's sleep I feel better and more accepting of my human frailty. It seems to me the key is being vigilant and then accepting of those frailties. In other words the issue can't be addressed if it's not first recognized or acknowledged.

As for the masculine/feminine thing, I've always felt a strong feminine aspect within, or at least that's how I always frame it in my mind. That's not to say I'm not masculine, far from it!

That is, I've always recognize an aspect of me that was more intuitive and compassionate than most of my male friends.

Originally Posted by Starman

KAM = Passion allowed to run into lust, and abnormal demand. We grow like that which we contemplate. Kam binds us to the animal plane.

AHANKAR = Vanity or egoism. Ahankar grows on the action of the other four perversions. Vanity operates with boasting long after the other four perversions have died. It is the source of error in humanity; it loudly says I am right and all others are wrong. The only thing worth doing in this life is to find a compatible spiritual path and walk in it.”

Bingo and I think that's pretty much the two vulnerability points he pointed out to me and that I related in my response to JustBe?

By the way, I'm appreciating this forum more and more each day! I was woefully unprepared for my recent experience and I'm so glad I found it and just want to thank everyone!

[hallow]

Originally Posted by JustASimpleGuy

...soryo (Tendai lineage) and he gave me two important pieces of advice.

1 - Do not discontinue practice regardless of whatever I'm experience, either positive or negative. Many of you have already provided that advice and point well taken. Thank you!

2 - Be ever vigilant of ego and especially if it's seemingly well under control. In fact that's the most crucial time because it could be working undercover in the subconscious and I might not have the experience to recognize it.

Question: Has anyone encountered the situation of after having a profound experience that ego works silently behind the scenes and then re-emerges at some later date and with a vengeance? If so how was it handled?

I've just recently encountered a thread on this site talking about "ego" just for a disclaimer I am not a professional anything, or guru. I am just an ordinary person. But have you ever talked to a less "professional" person with real life experiences on "ego"? Someone who will not use there own "ego" to influence yours? Because like you said, often it works undercover. Listen to both sides to get the full story.

Originally Posted by hallow

I've just recently encountered a thread on this site talking about "ego" just for a disclaimer I am not a professional anything, or guru. I am just an ordinary person. But have you ever talked to a less "professional" person with real life experiences on "ego"? Someone who will not use there own "ego" to influence yours? Because like you said, often it works undercover. Listen to both sides to get the full story.

The one and only time was with an ex-girlfriend and that was eight years ago and before I was knowingly on a spiritual path. Let's just say it didn't go well. My impression looking back is it was a battle between egos. LOL!

So no, and now I'm cautious because of that and also the experience I had relating my recent experiences to the one person I thought would understand and maybe have some valuable insights. I don't think that went over well either. I don't know anyone with the mindset that would facilitate a productive discussion, or at least it's my impression or intuition. I envision the end result being more harmful than beneficial and not just for myself.

For the most part I think I'm relatively good with the obvious manifestations of ego. I do just what I do when sitting in single-pointed meditation. I note it and let it go and additionally take a few breathes or do a body scan to ground myself.

Anyway that's why I posted this here. It's most likely the best venue to get that level of feedback. A sanity check, if you will. I do appreciate different perspectives and points of view.

[hallow]

Originally Posted by JustASimpleGuy

The one and only time was with an ex-girlfriend and that was eight years ago and before I was knowingly on a spiritual path. Let's just say it didn't go well. My impression looking back is it was a battle between egos. LOL!

So no, and now I'm cautious because of that and also the experience I had relating my recent experiences to the one person I thought would understand and maybe have some valuable insights. I don't think that went over well either. I don't know anyone with the mindset that would facilitate a productive discussion, or at least it's my impression or intuition. I envision the end result being more harmful than beneficial and not just for myself.

For the most part I think I'm relatively good with the obvious manifestations of ego. I do just what I do when sitting in single-pointed meditation. I note it and let it go and additionally take a few breathes or do a body scan to ground myself.

Anyway that's why I posted this here. It's most likely the best venue to get that level of feedback. A sanity check, if you will. I do appreciate different perspectives and points of view.

hey, I love open minded discussion On a topic especially one I want to learn from.

Originally Posted by hallow

hey, I love open minded discussion On a topic especially one I want to learn from.

So do I and across all ways of knowing or discovery. The ex I referred to was of the opinion I was too open minded to the point of naivety and at risk of having my brain spill out. LOL!

In my way of thinking there's a way of being open minded where one is willing to entertain ideas without immediate judgement one way or the other, but that's not to say a judgement won't eventually be made or one will accept anything on blind faith and without comprehension.