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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Soulmates & Twin Flames

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  #1  
Old 28-06-2020, 01:45 AM
InquiringMind InquiringMind is offline
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I Want Out of This Soul Contract with My Twin Flame

It's been awhile since I've written about my Twin Flame here, the last post being about whether I'd learned all I could from my Twin and maybe it was time to move now.

Now I want to get out of this soul contract.

I met my Twin six nearly seven year ago. I felt all the usual Twin Flame stuff - the cosmic connection, the sense of destiny, the feeling been two halves of a whole. I did date my Twin in a very short and very rocky relationship. She ended it, and she, being a Runner, ran off. I've spend the last several years learning everything I could from the relationship and trying to grow spiritually on my own. I tried to practice the spirit of Twin Flame - that she came into my life to teach me things, and that there was a lot of negative energy inside me that she brought to the surface to clear out. That's actually worked pretty well, and my emotional state has improved quite a bit.

But she seems to have not changed much. I've chatted with her about once or twice a year for the last several years, and she seems to be pretty much in the same place emotionally and spiritually, having not learned much from our relationship. She is, in her own words, "a little liar", "a cheat", and "a fake" (her words, not mine.).

The thing is, I've had this intuition my whole life that there was some important task I needed to accomplish and that there would be an important person that I would accomplish this task with. When I met my Twin, I had the very strong feeling that she was this important person that I needed to accomplish this important thing with. I felt that this task was supposed to be marriage and family. She seemed to have similar feelings, but as a Runner, she acted pretty crazy and ended up running off.

These years we've been apart I've continued to have the feeling that she is still this important person that I need to do this important task with, but it's looking pretty clear to me that she isn't really qualified to be a very good marriage partner (for anyone!) and that she probably is never going to change. Or at least she probably won't change enough to be able to create a good marriage. She's untrustworthy, rude, mean, noncommittal, dishonest, manipulative, emotionally unstable, depressed, dismissing, and she doesn't like physical intimacy. Pretty much the opposite of what anyone would want in a romantic partner. And yet I feel cosmically bound by this soul contract to be with her.

Except that now I feel that I don't really want that anymore. If I made soul contract with this person, I want out. I want someone who's actually going to be available for a good relationship, and now I'm in a better position to have some decent prospects.

Is there any way out of this soul contract?
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  #2  
Old 28-06-2020, 02:06 AM
LadyVictoria LadyVictoria is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by InquiringMind
She's untrustworthy, rude, mean, noncommittal, dishonest, manipulative, emotionally unstable, depressed, dismissing, and she doesn't like physical intimacy. Pretty much the opposite of what anyone would want in a romantic partner. And yet I feel cosmically bound by this soul contract to be with her.

Wow! You have some really strong opinions and beliefs regarding your supposed "twin flame". Not very flattering in the least.

Have you ever wondered how much of that is actually her and how much of that is actually you being projected onto her?

If I were you I would list all those not so nice attributes and circle the ones that you feel apply to you yourself as well and then look into doing some inner shadow work before venturing off to find your next "flame"/girlfriend/partner.

No offense intended but wow!


Quote:
Originally Posted by InquiringMind
Is there any way out of this soul contract?

What is a "soul contract"? The stuff that people convince themselves of never ceases to amaze and boggle my mind.

If you really believe that there is such a thing as a "soul contract" between you and this woman then take that imaginary contract and imagine it being torn in two. Or imagine some mystical "soul attorney" that files for termination of said contract and be done with it. Stop torturing yourself and move on.

Yeah I know - easier said than done.

But honestly you cannot form unhealthy opinions about someone and then expect to have a healthy relationship with them. Period.
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We're just two lost souls swimming in a fishbowl year after year. Running over the same old ground. Have we found the same old fears. Wish you were here." - Pink Floyd Wish You Were Here
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  #3  
Old 28-06-2020, 07:45 AM
asearcher
Posts: n/a
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by InquiringMind
It's been awhile since I've written about my Twin Flame here, the last post being about whether I'd learned all I could from my Twin and maybe it was time to move now.

Now I want to get out of this soul contract.

I met my Twin six nearly seven year ago. I felt all the usual Twin Flame stuff - the cosmic connection, the sense of destiny, the feeling been two halves of a whole. I did date my Twin in a very short and very rocky relationship. She ended it, and she, being a Runner, ran off. I've spend the last several years learning everything I could from the relationship and trying to grow spiritually on my own. I tried to practice the spirit of Twin Flame - that she came into my life to teach me things, and that there was a lot of negative energy inside me that she brought to the surface to clear out. That's actually worked pretty well, and my emotional state has improved quite a bit.

But she seems to have not changed much. I've chatted with her about once or twice a year for the last several years, and she seems to be pretty much in the same place emotionally and spiritually, having not learned much from our relationship. She is, in her own words, "a little liar", "a cheat", and "a fake" (her words, not mine.).

The thing is, I've had this intuition my whole life that there was some important task I needed to accomplish and that there would be an important person that I would accomplish this task with. When I met my Twin, I had the very strong feeling that she was this important person that I needed to accomplish this important thing with. I felt that this task was supposed to be marriage and family. She seemed to have similar feelings, but as a Runner, she acted pretty crazy and ended up running off.

These years we've been apart I've continued to have the feeling that she is still this important person that I need to do this important task with, but it's looking pretty clear to me that she isn't really qualified to be a very good marriage partner (for anyone!) and that she probably is never going to change. Or at least she probably won't change enough to be able to create a good marriage. She's untrustworthy, rude, mean, noncommittal, dishonest, manipulative, emotionally unstable, depressed, dismissing, and she doesn't like physical intimacy. Pretty much the opposite of what anyone would want in a romantic partner. And yet I feel cosmically bound by this soul contract to be with her.

Except that now I feel that I don't really want that anymore. If I made soul contract with this person, I want out. I want someone who's actually going to be available for a good relationship, and now I'm in a better position to have some decent prospects.

Is there any way out of this soul contract?
Could it be you feel responsible for her or that she make you feel responsible for her? She sounds a little self destructive. And her view of herself is not a particular good one. Like she is going to say these things of herself before you say it.

If so you need to (and I know, believe me, it is not easy) to be tough to yourself and tell you that she is not your responsibility. You have to let her go. I know this can seem like impossible, but she sadly needs to be just where she is for her spirit to eventually get out of that state and having learn from it.

You could make a procedure. I once check out the same on the internet wanting to cut off what ever invisible tie there was, but what ever you use as a tool know it is still only your thoughts, your heart that is doing all this soulmate connection and no procedure can get rid of that, only you can, it is only symbolic.

There are other soulmates out there for you. When one door closes another opens. But you have to be open to it too. And if you are still after several years that much into her (with your heart I mean, I can see that your brain can see how not so logic this is...) you have to let her go. Pretend she has died or something, I don't know, what ever will work so that you can get closer to having your goal, your dream come true.

What one needs to understand is that one can never change someone and one actually don't have the right to change someone. We all have free will. Like me and my love (Alright, this is gonna sound like a ridiculous comparison, but here I go anyhow): He is in my eyes a stickler. His parents are sticklers. I joke with him and say the only home he will ever be happy in is if he lives in an entire empty home so he does not feel that things are too messy. I am not a messy person, but I have higher tolerance against when it is messy and I can honestly say I am just as happy in a messy room as in a clean room. This will never change. He is who he is and I am who I am. I refuse to be the inferior one, the one he steps on because all sticklers believe they are a little bit better of cleaning and do a little bit more...they do not make their surrounding feel relaxed in their own home. They think they are entitled to go sniffing around and point out things. And they are negative. Never mind what I have done - it is only what I have not done that is important. Thing is there will always be things that has to be done. It goes around in a circle, it is never start and finish, especially if kids are in the home. When there are no kids around do you know how empty and meaningless this home seem to me? Then I smile if I see something a child has forgotten to put in it's right place.

I am not and will never change for him or for anyone for that matter. I don't ask of him to change either but we have a rule between us and that rule works.

You have to find your rule and it has to be one big fat wall, you know what I mean?
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  #4  
Old 29-06-2020, 03:31 AM
Ziusudra Ziusudra is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by InquiringMind
But she seems to have not changed much. I've chatted with her about once or twice a year for the last several years, and she seems to be pretty much in the same place emotionally and spiritually, having not learned much from our relationship. She is, in her own words, "a little liar", "a cheat", and "a fake" (her words, not mine.). ......

.....but it's looking pretty clear to me that she isn't really qualified to be a very good marriage partner (for anyone!) and that she probably is never going to change. Or at least she probably won't change enough to be able to create a good marriage. She's untrustworthy, rude, mean, noncommittal, dishonest, manipulative, emotionally unstable, depressed, dismissing, and she doesn't like physical intimacy. Pretty much the opposite of what anyone would want in a romantic partner. And yet I feel cosmically bound by this soul contract to be with her.

I don't think that she is running away from the soul connection.

She is clearly running away from YOU, the human male who thinks so little of her, who does not value her, who does not think that she is good enough for him, and who certainly does not respect her.

Since you two are connected, she probably feels and knows everything that you are thinking and feeling about her and about the connection.
Hence she does not want you.

Why would she want a man who does not even like her? Hmm?
It really does not matter how deep your connection is.
It is clear that you do not love her and probably do not have the ability to love her.
And she knows it in her heart and in her mind.
You just want her because she is connected to you in a soul level.
But it is not enough for her.
It is very selfish of you to think that she would settle for you, a man who would never be able to give her what she needs.
What you don't understand is that you are not good enough for her.

The reality is that you failed as a man for her.
It is best to accept your failure to be with her and just learn from it.
It has been years and you clearly have not learned, based on your blaming her for your own failure.


If my soul connection (or any man) thinks about me with such disrespect, I rather find another man (no need for a soul connection), just a nice loving man who finds me irresistible for all my strengths and even for all my imperfections.
In fact, I rather be alone for the rest of this physical life than be with a man who would never be good enough for me.
It does not matter how many past lives that we shared or what we are.

Quote:
Originally Posted by InquiringMind
Is there any way out of this soul contract?

Easy.
Simply ignore.
You don't have to acknowledge the contract.
Just live your life as you have been and do not change yourself to be the man that she wants.
I am sure that she has already been doing the same.
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Last edited by Ziusudra : 29-06-2020 at 04:57 AM.
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  #5  
Old 29-06-2020, 03:31 AM
Ziusudra Ziusudra is offline
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Dup...............
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  #6  
Old 29-06-2020, 12:49 PM
Lorelyen
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If you'll excuse me being honest and practical, it sounds like you fell in the usual trap of early dates. Most people put on their best behaviour; they pretend to agree with each other, like what each other likes and things; romance flourishes usually with a more carnal motive. But unless people are dyed in the wool romantics it dries up in the end. The chat runs out and if it was a veneer it starts to wear thin.

If she proclaims herself a fake then she's the one who made the greater effort to impress in the early days. Cosmic connection? It's too easy to imagine these things especially if you've been genning up about twin flames and she's pressing the right buttons, wittingly or not. It comes with an expectation bias.

She doesn't sound like your twin at all, looking at the doctrine so there's no "soul contract" (which I think is a nonsense anyway. You can't own someone else's soul and you can't trade yours - or it's usually dangerous to try). You can abandon yourself to someone and your soul goes with you but if things change - you in turn are abandoned then your soul remains intact.

So it's really up to you. You want to end it? Make that decision. Use whatever means / distraction to affirm it. Feel free! 7 years is an awful lot of life to spend on a hope. You don't declare your age in your profile but I'd guess at least mid-20s in which case you'll be wasting your best earthly years, the time when you can spend most time looking forward.

By the way, I can't agree with Ziusudra (who is perfectly entitled to her viewpoint). It doesn't need blame and pointing out who's at fault. We're human, things sometimes don't work out and we can only usefully be judged on our recovery, not the mistake.

All the best with turning this into history.
.

Last edited by Lorelyen : 29-06-2020 at 01:30 PM.
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  #7  
Old 29-06-2020, 07:39 PM
A human Being A human Being is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lorelyen
She doesn't sound like your twin at all, looking at the doctrine so there's no "soul contract" (which I think is a nonsense anyway. You can't own someone else's soul and you can't trade yours - or it's usually dangerous to try).
As far as I'm aware, soul contracts don't have anything to do with ownership - as I understand it, they're more like agreements between two souls that assist their development, help them to become conscious of and heal core issues/wounds and so on (article here which may help to clear things up a tad).
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Old 29-06-2020, 10:01 PM
Lorelyen
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Quote:
Originally Posted by A human Being
As far as I'm aware, soul contracts don't have anything to do with ownership - as I understand it, they're more like agreements between two souls that assist their development, help them to become conscious of and heal core issues/wounds and so on (article here which may help to clear things up a tad).
I see what you mean....but the idea of contract implies at least a quasi-legal agreement and in this sense suggests 'commitment' to the terms on both sides.

But the article seems full of suppositions. The opening didn't make sense:
Quote:
These are the people who meet us for a specific reason, a reason we usually are yet to discover and may not understand after the relationship has fulfilled its purpose
"and may not understand after the relationship has fulfilled its purpose?"

....which seems to fit with InquiringMind's issue. Looks like the relationship has fulfilled as much purpose as it's going to here on Earth. So...what would the point be? And maybe you can see why someone might be sceptical.

But then we get into mystical stuff where one entity is interfering with another's spiritual path, and in the absence of positive evidence could be soft coercion.

Quote:
Soul contracts are agreements we make with other souls before we are born.
A big assumption but let's say it's possible.,,,,
Quote:
Souls we have contracts with will be those to bring deep changes into our lives through unique connection.
....but we can meet many who affect our lives in this way from, say, a first sexual experience to a change of parents to the person who formally sets us off on a "spiritual path" to...etc.
Quote:
These contracts are made with a special purpose, and that is to teach us important lessons we’ve chosen to learn before reincarnation.
Well, perhaps I'm alone in thinking that all lessons are important but that aside, we've chosen to learn? This is where it gets complicated because unless exploration of ones deeper Mysteries lead them to understand what those lessons to which they agreed are (beyond me, I'll confess, and I've made at least some exploration!) how can someone know which of the many entities with whom they engage in "this life" is the one who's arrived to teach those lessons? Or the reverse. We learn an important lesson and can trace back...


But, I suppose, it could be all "true". Perhaps InquiringMind was right. And he's now in the process of learning an important lesson, rueful though he feels about the process. Perhaps it's necessary to see it that way. Doing so could even be the release he seeks.

Thanks for the response and I hope you're keeping well and getting through this wretched Covid thing.
Bests for now.
.
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Old 29-06-2020, 10:45 PM
FairyCrystal FairyCrystal is offline
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The biggest thing 'wrong' with all this -and I haven't read it all- is the OP himself assuming that he has a soul contract with another person. We do not get a file with soul contracts at birth telling us this stuff. So where does it come from other than his own assumption?
Yes, we have agreements with certain souls, but that doesn't mean this always is about a long term relationship or connection. Sometimes it's a few minutes, temporary, or superficial. I personally don't believe that all agreements are meant to come true either. I believe there's so called contingency agreements, that if you miss a lesson / opportunity that your Soul really has/wants to learn because something with one person goes awry, then another will come along to help you. Someone who can in turn be helped by you.

Now this all still comes down to speculation and personal beliefs. Including the soul contract that the OP was talking about.
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Old 30-06-2020, 04:42 AM
A human Being A human Being is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lorelyen
But the article seems full of suppositions. The opening didn't make sense:
"and may not understand after the relationship has fulfilled its purpose?"
I was confused by that sentence too - I was thinking that maybe the author of the article omitted a crucial word, maybe it was supposed to read '...and may not understand UNTIL after the relationship has fulfilled its purpose'? Hard to say for sure.

With regards to the concept of soul contracts more generally, it's one of those notions that I'm intrigued by but I couldn't say for sure that there's any validity to it, and I thought you raised some very good points. Either way, I think that if there's a particular situation in one's life that remains unresolved, that's simply an indication that one hasn't resolved the core issue (and I have enough unresolved issues of my own, so I don't intend that as a negative judgment). Self-awareness and self-honesty are key, I think, it really is the truth that sets us free in the end.

I hope you're keeping well, too :)
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