Is it really possible to unconditionally love those that have hurt us?

Hi everyone,

Is it really possible to unconditionally love those that have hurt us? I saw somewhere that as you go through ascension, you end relationships that are not based on unconditional love. As in, they fall away without much drama. But what about someone that was bad for you? Personally I am thinking of someone that actually caused me to radically change my approach to life because I was so unhappy. I communicated with this person recently and I thanked them for having been in my life, my reasoning being that although I was not fulfilled deep inside, they did give me companionship and allowed me to grow from them. And this wasn't the reason why I reached out, but as I said, had it not been for them, I probably would not have embarked on the spiritual path. But I don't think this person appreciated this and so now it's hard for me hold this space for them? Is all this spiritual stuff getting to my head and making me unrealistic about this? And as I said, would you unconditionally love someone like this? Maybe it's not even about unconditionally loving them, but if it isn't, then what exactly should I be feeling instead?

Thanks in advance for reading and for your help

[JustBe]

People are as they are and come.

Some are open, some are not so open.

Letting go through a space of understanding and acceptance in you, simply means you move on in peace.

Without conditions in you, you accept yourself without judgements. When you understand this as yourself, you’ll let go and accept others the same.

Why are you asking others what you feel?

Ask yourself with attention within how you really feel?

Spiritual bypassing is the thing you don’t really won’t to be doing, where as looking at yourself and being radically honest with you is all that matters initially.

What you become through honest self reflection and letting go is clarity and peace. What others are being and doing then, won’t affect you.

Thanks JustBe. I guess I'm just obsessing about clearing the karma but am inadvertently creating more with this communication. I guess I'm still not at peace.

[iamthat]

Originally Posted by traceyacey12

...And as I said, would you unconditionally love someone like this? Maybe it's not even about unconditionally loving them, but if it isn't, then what exactly should I be feeling instead?

We have to differentiate between love on an emotional level and love on the level of Soul or Consciousness.

The nature of emotional love is conditional and discriminatory. We feel love for a family member but not for a stranger on the street. We feel love for certain people if they satisfy certain conditions. If people hurt us then we do not feel love for them, instead we may feel anger or bitterness or fear. Love on just an emotional level is an internal response to something external.

Love on the level of Soul or Consciousness is unconditional and universal. The quality of the Soul is love. Such love arises spontaneously from within and shines on everyone and everything, regardless of what they may do or not do. Just as the sun shines equally on the saint and the sinner.

The element associated with the emotions is water. Just as still waters provide a clear reflection of the sky and the surroundings, so a calm and serene emotional body provides a clear reflection of the love of the Soul.

Peace

[Miss Hepburn]

Personally? I have experienced it as a Grace from God...to have utter compassion and forgiveness
..passing thru you and in you, extending your aura out 5 feet...I mean it's an experience from Above...
Forgiveness is the KEY, btw, being in this place...so I pray for it.

I'm asking again for that Grace to have compassion for 3 wealthy (diff than rich) close friends that
would not donate to someone in dire need...not even $20...and their millions were inherited!! (I gave them money many years ago!)
So I'm no angel...it's a Gift from Above, as far as my exp...something to ask for and be open to receive...a big part of it.
Why? Cuz we want to hang on to our indignation....often.

Could I do it on my own...um, not really...it's God uplifting my heart to that frequency of love and
forgiveness and understanding like a mother understands their child doing something bad.

[Miss Hepburn]

Originally Posted by traceyacey12

Maybe it's not even about unconditionally loving them, but if it isn't,
then what exactly should I be feeling instead?

Oh, I missed this sentence...it is a good one!
Another idea: As Abraham-Hicks says ---you can't expect to jump from a very bad feeling up to happiness and bliss just like that.
So you move up the Emotional Scale, probably found online.

As in, anger feels better than fear and depression...so move into anger.
Disappointment feels better than anger....contentment (at least) feels better than disappointment.
Hope to optimism feels better than contentment.
Soon Hope leads to enthusiasm....as you get closer to Joy/Love and Empowerment.

So 'should feel'? --get to a slightly better feeling ...and then a better one...and then a better one.
If you don't wanna go the 'asking God directly' route. :)

The Emotion Scale is on page 114 of, "Ask And It Is Given" by Abraham-Hicks

[Native spirit]

I agree a lot with what iamthat and Miss Hepburn has said.

But the way i see it is as a Grieving you cry you get angry you are hurting

you don't want to face people.

But over time you learn to deal with it ,and you carry on you learn to smile again.

You go out into the sunshine and you forgive the person who has left you.

I always say forgiving is easy forgetting is not so


Namaste

[Miss Hepburn]

Originally Posted by Native spirit

I always say forgiving is easy forgetting is not so

I think if you've burnt your hand on the stove...you should NOT forget! Right.
Don't do it again.
Don't hate the stove, tho.
Be wise with that stove now...keep your distance.

Hahaha, I sound like Yoda!

Originally Posted by iamthat

... Just as still waters provide a clear reflection of the sky and the surroundings, so a calm and serene emotional body provides a clear reflection of the love of the Soul

So I have just wait til the emotions sort of boil over?

EDIT: nevermind, I just had an experience of unconditional love/ regard as Starman puts it. You put it so beautifully with serene emotional body. Totally resonates now

Originally Posted by Miss Hepburn

...So you move up the Emotional Scale...If you don't wanna go the 'asking God directly' route. :)

Thanks for the pointer. I'm still coming to grips about asking God but tonight I am planning on looking at the moon and asking it for guidance....progress! Hopefully it's visible