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  #21  
Old 21-11-2022, 09:28 AM
Joe Mc Joe Mc is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JustBe
everything is within you to settle those scores..
My ears pricked up when I saw these words...yes revenge at last .. hahaha sorry for taking your words out of context. Yes only something, last week or so, harkened back to a wound I encountered many moons ago, a break up that almost killed me. And I was surprised that I found myself doing something that is advised by all spiritual traditions and none, holding that person in the light, praying for them etc. Reason why it seems remarkable is I physically moved on years ago, had to, change countries and all of that but it surprised me how effective cleaning someone out of your heart is ..no longer seeing them responsible in anyway for what happened. Perhaps it is only time that allows these things but as you heard suggested many people do die of broken hearts etc. etc.

Self care has been a vital ingredient and still is for us all I believe. I noticed when I have been in counselling or around therapeutic and healing people that to let go requires that you almost have to recreate a 'new self' alongside the letting go and finding out that the 'new self' is the letting go ..nothing else may be required. Instead of thinking how great the perceived Bully in your life has been and all in the name of forgiveness, you actually need to celebrate your own being and it's own miraculous nature ..eventually and that might be a very long time you will be able to see that person in a spiritual way and let them go 'at depth'.

Phewwww !!!! it's all very heady stuff lol...thank you for your thoughtful post. Joe.

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  #22  
Old 21-11-2022, 10:01 AM
RedEmbers RedEmbers is offline
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I've spent most of my life healing a broken heart ahahaha.

I'm almost there...

My sisters wounds of the feminine relate to our mother and mine are more heavily with my father.I have heard that our relationship with God tends to be defined by the relationship with our primary care givers.

Although when it comes to me being a mother my own wounds come from both, mother and father.

I tell you what... some of this stuff I experience seems a little bit tired to me at times.

As to creating the new... the old informs the new... showing where to transform from old patterns and cycles.

As for forgiveness... it seems that healing has its own timing.
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  #23  
Old 21-11-2022, 12:41 PM
Tal M. Tal M. is offline
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*Claps*
I love this. you touched the core of our entire lives. -the pain and code underneath every thing that we do and every decision we take.

I know because I too have explored these inner realms. And I saw so beautifully the relationship dynamics between the feminine and masculine, the mother and father, how it affects us, their relationship to each other, their view points, their wounds, their pain and their decisions according to it.
This is a heart, that connects all things together, the heart is the center of all feelings, love, and pain, and it is also another name for core... our core that from it everything grows
it's a bit personal to share but my parents have been divorced ever since I was born, and continued to fiercely hate each other my entire life. I didn't realize this until recently in deep meditation, that... all of this completely shaped my relationship between the masculine and feminine inside me, and why relationships out side, in the world, are so difficult for me. I related to my father who hated my mother, and I related to my mother who hated my father. Both of them are wounded inside me. and I cannot find resolution with love searching outside.. it has to be resolved, felt, hugged, cried and reconciled inside me...
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  #24  
Old 21-11-2022, 02:43 PM
Unseeking Seeker Unseeking Seeker is offline
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As a part of general mindful attentiveness, we notice mind and body including what we call pain and joy. It can be a physical thing profound or subtle, desire and aversion, glaring or subtle. The point is, anything that arises, if we simply look at it, accept but refuse to cling, just notice, if needed, transforming the affliction with healing light, our light, God’s light distilled through an aspect of surrender* (*we don’t know the whole story, so impose no will as in choosing outcome), there’s nothing to be done or worry about.

Our vulnerability has to do with pattern prediction. For example, someone deceives us, let’s us down. This experience comes to us at soul level and simultaneously to mind-body (ego). Maybe we react also momentarily (we are in the body, after all) but then, that’s it. It’s of no consequence.

That that impacts us, teaches us something. So we’re grateful. Having chosen to experience duality, contrast in slow motion, we are here. But who hurts us? Who loves us? In either case why do we oscillate and if we do, why do we needlessly indulge in the event (nonevent) by stagnating therein?
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  #25  
Old 22-11-2022, 08:14 AM
JustBe JustBe is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Joe Mc
..eventually and that might be a very long time you will be able to see that person in a spiritual way and let them go 'at depth'.

Phewwww !!!! it's all very heady stuff lol...thank you for your thoughtful post. Joe.
I’ll let you work on your revenge haha.
I do feel most unresolved baggage sits inside us and ripples through everything even if you don’t believe your affected by it. So in my experience, it’s helpful to get to the roots and inception to release the whole binds it creates.

I think I was lucky in that I got the whole self reflective/I’m responsible for my part early in my life. Once aware in this way it kind of stabilised me in process where by, I knew if I went deeper enough that resolve naturally extended itself as the resolve. In other words when you understand fully your own process as deep as peace, compassionate loving kindness, you can’t help but extend that awareness for all processors, or even for the ignorant who act out in this way.

I think I’m basically saying the same as you but in a different way..
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Your trials did not come to punish you, but to awaken you - to make you realise that you are a part of Spirit and that just behind the sparks of your life is
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  #26  
Old 22-11-2022, 01:15 PM
Joe Mc Joe Mc is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JustBe
I’ll let you work on your revenge haha. .
Indeed ! lol. In the Zen tradition of Buddhism I came across, the saying
Big Suffering, Big Enlightenment !!! When I came across that saying it gave me
a much wanted boost of energy and I continued on down the path of change and release from traumatic pain. Not sure if I feel sorry for certain people and episodes in my life but i think i do as i glimpse the vastness of space and universe and macro/microcosmic dimensions of it all. A thought came to me the
other day and it said something about the people we believed had control over us and hurt us etc. It said you'll be lucky to be in control of your bowels by the end of this life never mind
hurting anyone ....Salient thought ..as my granny use to say God bless your constitution etc.


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  #27  
Old 22-11-2022, 04:01 PM
Redchic12 Redchic12 is offline
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Just luuuuuv ya granny Joe!
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  #28  
Old 22-11-2022, 11:54 PM
JustBe JustBe is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RedEmbers
I've spent most of my life healing a broken heart ahahaha.
being a mother my own wounds come from both, mother and father.
I tell you what... some of this stuff I experience seems a little bit tired to me at times.
When you say tired at times is that because it becomes so repetitive for you?

For me, I mostly carried a huge pocket of invalidated ‘me’ mainly because my world was rather foreign to my family. Being highly sensitive, empathic and a predominate intuitive processor of the world I resided in, my world was rather complex and very different to my parents and siblings. Also add introversion into that picture and there you see without validation and understanding, you become very enmeshed in the world of others. So undoing the totality of all that pretty much took me to both my father and my mother and their generational lineages, which ultimately rebuilds your own connection to self/source, when you heal those timelines.

I think most of the unspoken/silent repressed stuff came through my introverted mother. She definitely in her wounds, even as they were not outwardly apparent, were very inwardly apparent in me. My father on the other hand called a spade a spade, was lively, outgoing and let all his emotions pour out in every way of his life.

For a sensitive empath both extremes contribute greatly to not being able to find yourself because most often your taking in these two processors confused and skewed by where you fit.. lol

My parents were good people but regardless, they modelled two extremes and taking in both of those, I see they both contributed to my chaos and mess.

Regardless of their hidden and not so hidden selves, the most crucial element for all of us as children is the power of modelling. Be it your parents or siblings we do endure a foundation that is reinforced over and over, unless of course you see change and growth through the whole family dynamics.

In the end we are individual pieces within the whole so our piece becomes our unique piece and path from all that.

And of course that’s a changing life process that any of us can choose to overcome and change.
__________________
Your trials did not come to punish you, but to awaken you - to make you realise that you are a part of Spirit and that just behind the sparks of your life is
the Flame of Infinity.
Paramahansa Yogananda
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  #29  
Old 23-11-2022, 01:06 AM
JustBe JustBe is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tal M.
This is a heart, that connects it has to be resolved, felt, hugged, cried and reconciled inside me...
Thank you for sharing your story and insights. It would have been a very powerful model layered over your own heart. As difficult as your piece would have been, that depth of resolve lends you to experience your life free from their pain and fre to be you. Something I treasure now beyond my parents modelling.

What you shared above says it all and so very true.
__________________
Your trials did not come to punish you, but to awaken you - to make you realise that you are a part of Spirit and that just behind the sparks of your life is
the Flame of Infinity.
Paramahansa Yogananda
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  #30  
Old 23-11-2022, 06:56 AM
Joe Mc Joe Mc is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Redchic12
Just luuuuuv ya granny Joe!
Aha, yes indeed one of the great spiritual aphorisms found in recent times. Is this one of the great epigrammatic sayings that was found after several months hiking through the Amazonian rainforest by a party of very young and bright adventurers ? In the dusk of the Amazonian rainforest filled with the cries of various monkeys and the onset of darkness a young adventurer pulled back some vines to find a temple stone. After several minutes of clearing and cleaning of the stone, they shone their torches on the epigram, and of course, there in the onset of jungle and human torch light, the words so finely craved all those Millenia ago read .........

JUST LOVE YA GRANNY JOE ! ( has to be said with a Glaswegian accent )

Of course no need to say, the party of young adventurers fell to their knees and wept... (sorry they were already on their knees lol)

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