Refusing to Let Go of Life
Hello
Not sure how I feel about dying when one goes the long way out. When you are in Hospice House and you are not going to come out, but you too do not want to let go and die. You stay holding on and on, family being told its "hours" that turns into days.....so they are by your side 24 / 7. Family comes in from out of town on limited leave from work and you hang on and on. You pass into a coma but still you hang in there.
I so do not want to go out that way in the end. I do not want family tied to me to the bitter end of life holding on and on. Too I know I do not have a say in how I might well go out or what I would do when I am in that place of life entering into death.
Do we have a say in going? Or is it like my Dad said you have a pre destined time and when that is done then you go, not before.
Yes life is precious but too quality of life to me is more precious. I know how sick I was at this time last year, and how I thought that was all she wrote for me so often. I had to fight with everything I have in me to come back again, to heal and learn new ways to do things. I have tools that out my socks on and shoes on, I have grabbers to pick things up off the floor, even one that folds down to take in my swimming bag. I use them at time to put cloths on.
I have a cane that has a handle on it to get up from a chair that is too low, that folds down. Yes you sure get the "looks" when using tools to aid your day to day, but they work.
I am blessed with a daughter that is going to school to be a care aide that helps with nail cutting and socks at times. I so hope that will be the extent of care she has to give to me.
I guess as a Medium I see death differently not as an end but as a transformation that time we change our role in the Universe.
Lynn
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