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  #11  
Old 05-11-2020, 10:19 AM
Native spirit Native spirit is offline
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This pandemic has shown people as they really are i have been in a super market doing my shop.
I walk with a crutch sometimes two of them. to have people push past me to grab everything of the shelves,
Im tolerant of a lot of people different circumstances affect different people,
but these were just rude.

If my daughter was'nt near me i would have fallen. until someone tried it again this time i gave them a right telling off.in front of everyone i Shammed them that gave me more pleasure to see them squirm.

Being nice to see someone does not always work.


Namaste
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  #12  
Old 05-11-2020, 04:40 PM
BigJohn BigJohn is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Native spirit
This pandemic has shown people as they really are i have been in a super market doing my shop.
I walk with a crutch sometimes two of them. to have people push past me to grab everything of the shelves,
Im tolerant of a lot of people different circumstances affect different people,
but these were just rude.

If my daughter was'nt near me i would have fallen. until someone tried it again this time i gave them a right telling off.in front of everyone i Shammed them that gave me more pleasure to see them squirm.

Being nice to see someone does not always work.


Namaste

Good for you when "I gave them a right telling off in front of everyone".

One night, I was out walking. The background noise from cars blocked out the quietness of the night. As I was crossing one street to my left, a car turned and went behind me. The car came very close and scared me. The driver just could not wait which is what they are suppose to do. I immediately ripped off a bunch of nasty words which most people have never heard in those combinations.

Can you believe it, a few minutes later, the same person came back and asked if everything was okay.
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  #13  
Old 05-11-2020, 05:16 PM
Heightend-Awareness Heightend-Awareness is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ant
Not a different kettle of fish at all.

I provided a real life scenario.

Try back peddling.
When I opened this post my intentions were about the everyday rudeness of people in general. Such as lack of courtesy, lack of manners, being inconsiderate, foul language etc. Having someone threaten your life via knife or gun pulled on you, is a life-threatening situation that goes far beyond rudeness and the original intention of the OP.

So if you can expalin to me the similarities between the two, I would be most apperciative and better educated by it. May be I should of included the scope of how to deal with aggressive and violent people who pose a high probability of enacting a life-threatening situation. Does this help my cause in back peddling?
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'The two most important days in your life; the day you were born and the day you find out why.' - Mark Twain

Ha ezek lennének az utolsó szavaim, minden jót kívánok az élet során. Ahogy mindent megtettem, hogy figyelmeztesselek. Béke és szeretet mindig - HA

Yes, I spell my alias incorrectly on purpose. To prove I am not perfect. Yet.
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  #14  
Old 05-11-2020, 05:19 PM
Heightend-Awareness Heightend-Awareness is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Native spirit
This pandemic has shown people as they really are i have been in a super market doing my shop.
I walk with a crutch sometimes two of them. to have people push past me to grab everything of the shelves,
Im tolerant of a lot of people different circumstances affect different people,
but these were just rude.

If my daughter was'nt near me i would have fallen. until someone tried it again this time i gave them a right telling off.in front of everyone i Shammed them that gave me more pleasure to see them squirm.

Being nice to see someone does not always work.


Namaste
That is true. As there would be a sliding scale of tolerance and reactions form any action or lack of action.
__________________
'The two most important days in your life; the day you were born and the day you find out why.' - Mark Twain

Ha ezek lennének az utolsó szavaim, minden jót kívánok az élet során. Ahogy mindent megtettem, hogy figyelmeztesselek. Béke és szeretet mindig - HA

Yes, I spell my alias incorrectly on purpose. To prove I am not perfect. Yet.
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  #15  
Old 05-11-2020, 05:26 PM
Kioma
Posts: n/a
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by BigJohn
Good for you when "I gave them a right telling off in front of everyone".

One night, I was out walking. The background noise from cars blocked out the quietness of the night. As I was crossing one street to my left, a car turned and went behind me. The car came very close and scared me. The driver just could not wait which is what they are suppose to do. I immediately ripped off a bunch of nasty words which most people have never heard in those combinations.

Can you believe it, a few minutes later, the same person came back and asked if everything was okay.
Driving is a good metaphor for ordinary human interactions. I drive a lot in my work, and I see all kinds. I keep in mind, however, that sometimes people are just in a bigger hurry than I am. I accommodate them and don't worry about it. The reason I get in a car is because I have places to go, obviously, but the goal is to get there, not to be the king of the road. I drive accordingly - and yes, a couple times I've pulled over to let people pass only to see them pulled over by the cops up the road. Oops.

One incident that relates to your story BJ was many years ago as I came out of a market. I looked to the right and a big car with a very elderly couple in it were driving slowly towards me. It was a parking lot, where pedestrians always have the right of way, and I was in a bit of a hurry. I judged they had plenty of time to stop as I stepped out. I made it almost all the way across before I realized they weren't stopping! I leaped out of the way just in time to clear the right fender. I looked at the old couple - she was driving - and neither one was looking at me. They just kept driving, very slowly, squinting intently straight ahead, and I realized they weren't moving slowly because they were such good drivers, nor were they being rude or thoughtless - they were moving slowly because they were practically blind. I stared after them, not sure what to do next, as they reached the edge of the parking lot and pulled out into traffic. I prayed they made it home safe, and didn't cause any accidents - and that someone soon relieved them of their driving privileges.

We tend to make a lot of assumptions about other people and their motivations. We tend to be very defensive of our own space and self-perceived priority, and interpret many innocuous actions as threatening or impertinent when actually there is an entire universe out there that has nothing to do with what we think. People do things for reasons, and we are rarely interested in what those reasons are, and even less interested if it means we should take a back seat.

Of course sometimes people actually do need a good shaming, as Native Spirit pointed out. I just wonder it it's as often as people seem to think.
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  #16  
Old 05-11-2020, 05:29 PM
Heightend-Awareness Heightend-Awareness is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ant
Where do we draw the line?
Knowing the difference between life-threatening circumstances and rudeness.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ant
Your thoughts Heightend-Awareness,on how you would deal with the above encounters?
For this scenario, I would disrepctfully disarm my offending perpetrator and hand him his own ar$e. As this is a life threatening situation and not an act of rudness you can just brush off.
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'The two most important days in your life; the day you were born and the day you find out why.' - Mark Twain

Ha ezek lennének az utolsó szavaim, minden jót kívánok az élet során. Ahogy mindent megtettem, hogy figyelmeztesselek. Béke és szeretet mindig - HA

Yes, I spell my alias incorrectly on purpose. To prove I am not perfect. Yet.
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  #17  
Old 05-11-2020, 05:42 PM
peteyzen peteyzen is offline
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As its a spiritual forum, if we analyse this from the position of karma. If someone is rude to you, that event happens because you earned it (according to the law of karma) through previous actions (this life and previous ones). So, if you see it like that, rather than someone attacking you, one can view the situation as if `Phew, that karma has been paid and is now gone`. If you respond with kindness, as the thread starter said, this often diffuses the situation, and creates some skillfull karma for yourself. If however you respond angrily, it will enflame the other person, probably cause a bigger row, and...create more unskillfull karma that you will have to deal with in the future.
That`s the theory, but sometimes knob heads need to be put in their place lol!!!! and the satisfaction of the moment outweighs the karma to come...Just kidding.
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  #18  
Old 05-11-2020, 05:57 PM
Heightend-Awareness Heightend-Awareness is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by peteyzen
As its a spiritual forum, if we analyse this from the position of karma. If someone is rude to you, that event happens because you earned it (according to the law of karma) through previous actions (this life and previous ones). So, if you see it like that, rather than someone attacking you, one can view the situation as if `Phew, that karma has been paid and is now gone`. If you respond with kindness, as the thread starter said, this often diffuses the situation, and creates some skillfull karma for yourself. If however you respond angrily, it will enflame the other person, probably cause a bigger row, and...create more unskillfull karma that you will have to deal with in the future.
That`s the theory, but sometimes knob heads need to be put in their place lol!!!! and the satisfaction of the moment outweighs the karma to come...Just kidding.
Well said.
__________________
'The two most important days in your life; the day you were born and the day you find out why.' - Mark Twain

Ha ezek lennének az utolsó szavaim, minden jót kívánok az élet során. Ahogy mindent megtettem, hogy figyelmeztesselek. Béke és szeretet mindig - HA

Yes, I spell my alias incorrectly on purpose. To prove I am not perfect. Yet.
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  #19  
Old 05-11-2020, 06:59 PM
BigJohn BigJohn is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by peteyzen
As its a spiritual forum, if we analyse this from the position of karma. If someone is rude to you, that event happens because you earned it (according to the law of karma) through previous actions (this life and previous ones). So, if you see it like that, rather than someone attacking you, one can view the situation as if `Phew, that karma has been paid and is now gone`. If you respond with kindness, as the thread starter said, this often diffuses the situation, and creates some skillfull karma for yourself. If however you respond angrily, it will enflame the other person, probably cause a bigger row, and...create more unskillfull karma that you will have to deal with in the future.
That`s the theory, but sometimes knob heads need to be put in their place lol!!!! and the satisfaction of the moment outweighs the karma to come...Just kidding.

I agree with you.......
but in many cases, when something happens, I go into an automatic mode which it seems I have no control over.
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        Happiness is the result of an enlightened mind whereas suffering is caused by a distorted mind.
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  #20  
Old 05-11-2020, 10:16 PM
ant
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“A system of morality which is based on relative emotional values is a mere illusion, a thoroughly vulgar conception which has nothing sound in it and nothing true.”

― Socrates


If we balance the line of reaction and non reaction,and assess the situations on a case by case basis,we can then 'act' accordingly to brandishing some wit/humor and tough love to those who deservingly need it.
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