Marriage is an outdated and limiting concept

I would love to get a discussion going about this, have seen some pretty opposing views with good points on either side. I am not seeing that being monogamous is a bad idea I just think that it is really silly to get the law and the state involved, who I decide to have sex with or be with has to do with the people involved nobody else.

I think that this article really puts it in perspective, http://www.selfrealizationgroup.info...iting-concept/
Opinions?

[aubreyiris]

A true healthy marriage is about a heck of a lot more than sex. It's about commitment, sacrifice, unconditional love, selflessness, compromise and raising children in a nurturing and stable environment. I don't necessarily think the law has to be involved, but I think having some sort of ceremony with loved ones present is an important way of becoming more than just sexual partners but family.

I'm all for marriage, so long as there's divorce.

Many times I think people have a limitting view of marriage which makes it feel limited. But marriage is so much more than getting the law or the state involved especially because marriage is something that occurs even without government regulation. Most of the people in my family and most of my ancestors lived and grew up in a place where the government wasn't even on their island and they had what would be called a common law marriage.

posted under wrong section...

[LadyMay]

I haven't read it all, but I saw the main points about marriage is both a way for the state to keep an eye on people and keep society running smoothly and also a form of ego-gratification to soothe your own insecurities.. I agree with both of these. Outside of those two things marriage has no purpose and it has no meaning.

Love is love. And a piece of paper 'proving' your love is just a piece of paper. If someone wants to idealise the connection then that's up to them, but apart from your fantasies and the state benefits it holds no substance.

[durgaa]

Just don't assume God has anything to do with 99% of marriages..
Ordinary marriage means nothing to me - it's just a piece of paper. However, l do believe that when two soul's join, it becomes a 'sacred marriage' - but l think its extremely rare.
For myself l believe in the following (if all you want is an ordinary life in an ordinary marriage, none of this matters):

Beyond all that, in the depths, at the centre, at the summit of the being, there is a Supreme Truth of being, an Eternal Light, independent of all the circumstances of birth, country, environment, education; That is the origin, cause and master our spiritual development; it is That which gives a permanent direction to our lives; it is That which determines Destinies; it is in the consciousness of That that you must unite. To be one in aspiration and ascension, to move forward at the same pace on the same spiritual path, that is the secret of a lasting union

Originally Posted by KevinO

I'm all for marriage, so long as there's divorce.

LOL LOL!! I'll second that! ;)

Originally Posted by ScarlettHayden

I haven't read it all, but I saw the main points about marriage is both a way for the state to keep an eye on people and keep society running smoothly and also a form of ego-gratification to soothe your own insecurities.. I agree with both of these. Outside of those two things marriage has no purpose and it has no meaning.

Love is love. And a piece of paper 'proving' your love is just a piece of paper. If someone wants to idealise the connection then that's up to them, but apart from your fantasies and the state benefits it holds no substance.

Very well said, I have thought of this as well...how our upbringing & society portrayed (or still does) how lives should be lived...you go to school, then possibly more school, then get a good job, somewhere in there you get married, buy a house, have a family...nowadays, I'm happy to see young adults waiting longer before all that responsibility, travel, see the world, experience life, be a little carefree...don't settle down so quickly, discover who they truly are...people change over the years, especially from 18 to 30! I've always been a hard worker, no problem with hard work but I wish the thought would've entered my mind years ago to travel & experience different cultures, etc...to this day, I've never had a vacation, I encourage my son to live his life to the fullest but don't drag his name through the mud ;)

It should be a conscious decision every day to stay with that one special person, a piece of paper isn't going to make anyone stay with another if they're unhappy.

[Theophila]

Originally Posted by durgaa

Just don't assume God has anything to do with 99% of marriages..
Ordinary marriage means nothing to me - it's just a piece of paper. However, l do believe that when two soul's join, it becomes a 'sacred marriage' - but l think its extremely rare.
For myself l believe in the following (if all you want is an ordinary life in an ordinary marriage, none of this matters):

It's funny, while I was single, this is exactly what I had in mind when I thought of marriage...
I felt it was a huge decision to join lives with someone. I never had the fairytale dream....
It was important to me that we be connected, that there would be a common journey...
Most importantly a deep and true love....
That to me was what a " sacred " marriage meant, and the only reason for me to go to church and go through the ritual...with an honest heart.
People thought I was reaching for the stars, that it doesn't exist, that I should look at the " good catch" list and grab an opportunity....

Life happened and I married for my child....to honor her father with whom I was involved and put effort into keeping a family...
Safe to say I married at the town hall...
I couldn't bring myself to a church...
Not that I didn't care nor love...but I did not feel he was for life.
And guess what...
With all effort, it wouldn't , couldn't stick...
From both ends we could just not connect.
When we spoke it was as if we were speaking two different languages....
And the inevitable happened...
Remembering back to when I was single and ALL the advice I was getting from everyone...I realised that what my heart said was the truth...
But hey, that is what marriage is for me , not for everyone.......