Things will get better

[SaintMatthew]

Oh Lord the depression wont go away.
I assume this is the result of my sins.
I feel daggers shedding apart my mind and heart.
Sometimes my prayers bring my soul relief
sometimes they return to me and stab me heart

The enemies of my soul have encircled me like sharks
They smell fresh blood and are moving in for the kill
IT is hard to stay sober when you want to die

I try to think positive thoughts but only the screams of our suffering world
only the screams of the accuser,
only the roar of the mighty lion can be heard
the Lion that prowls through the world to devour souls.

Do not plug your ears to the cry of the sinner
Do not hold the orphan accountable

I have done this to myself
yet I blamed you
but your mercy is steadfast
Please return to me all the time, energy, and virtue that the moth has eaten
Deliver us oh Lord from evil

You took our shame and guilt upon yourself
my sins and the sins of all humanity, past, present and future were nailed to the cross with you

set us free Lord God
Speak to us so that we can hear and understand you
I feel like throwing in the towel
Im giving up yet giving it to you
It is too much for me

But you make all things new.
Send legions of Angels
Even if my life ends in failure
You will win the victory in the end, and I am united with you
And all who are united with you will share in your victory
Even if in my life I had won and succeeded in accomplishing my purpose
that is microscopic (insignificant) compared to the victory that you will win
Which overflows with unfathomable glory

And all of us who are one body with you,
Share in your victory
and share in the glory
Those who are bowed down
those who are defeated
they will be one in mind and heart with you
and share your joy...and your victory

I know this to be true
Your Spirit confirmed it
Even the defeated shall emerge victorious!

Eternally!
Your will, will triumph!

In Jesus name I pray in union with the Church and the Angels and Saints
Amen