Another intense dream

Wow, it seems like something in or around me is definitely drastically changing or going to change

In the dream i am in the attic of my parents house. Weird thing is that in real life this was the house where my best friend lived. I stand in front of the window there and see the neighbour (older woman) coming on the roof terrace and walking towards the railing. I then know she wants to climb over and let herself fall...she wants to commit suicide. As soon as she puts one leg over the railing i yell at her not to do that. She pulls back her leg, but as soon as i seem to watch in another direction she tries it again. Before she tries it for a third time i am shouting at my mother downstairs what our neighbour is doing. While i talk to my mother about it i see from the corner of my eye that she now has both legs over the railing and jumps. Too late...but when i get outside i find her lying on the roof terrace, like she fell on this side of the railing (?). She´s injured...(can´t remember if she died)

[inavalan]

The way I see it ...

Every dream-event, as well as every awake-event, has multi-layered symbolism. It is for you to interpret it down to the deepest level you're able to, and learn form that.

If I had your dream ...

I think that it is a typical example of how our reality follows our thoughts:

- you worry about something and that happens
- you hope for a good outcome and that happens

This happens faster in the dream-reality because it is more malleable, but it happens in our awake-reality too.

If you lucidly observe your dream, and your life, you notice this continuous up and down, and learn from it. When you dream and live without lucidity, your emotions get out of balance, and usually the negative ones win, causing you pain. The negative ones win because they're eventually tied to the instinct of survival.

Hi Inavalan,

thanks for your thoughts!

This one (and other dreams as well) are multi-layered.

- you worry about something and that happens
- you hope for a good outcome and that happens


Both could apply. It would make the interpretation very simple.

I know why my mind choose this specific person. She is a mirror for me for a certain part of my life (in the dream). My thought about that what she mirrors is that i don´t want that to be like that for myself. Of course this also says a lot about how i think about myself.
Now i am meditating, looking for a more quiet mind/ego. Now it could be that the woman trying to commit suicide is symbolic for a ego dissolving...me yelling at her to not do...my ego yelling, because it feels it is loosing its power. The fact that the woman jumped though landed not that deep could mean that the ego still has a place.

It could also be about me wanting not to ´end up´ like that woman. Her trying to commit suicide then is my effort to try and change. I am not her....i am me...my Self.

[inavalan]

Nobody could interpret your dream better than yourself. On the other hand, you have to be aware that your beliefs distort your interpretation, so you have to intentionally leave aside your beliefs and expectations.

For example, your references to "ego dissolving" point to your beliefs about such a thing being possible, desirable, ... , beliefs borrowed from what you read and heard. If you put those beliefs aside, you might be able to reach deeper interpretations.

Also, usually, when we get a message of knowledge or guidance from our inner source, it comes in multiple instances and forms: several dreams, events / situations in our awake lives.

The dissolving of the ego...is something i heard and read about...subconsciously maybe already years ago...consciously the last couple of months.

I am aware of the fact that i try to interpret the dream from the ´whole´ of how i feel or am right now or at a specific moment. Aware that this changes after reading things, experiencing things. As far as believing...i am pretty sceptic about a lot...The fact that my dreams suddenly change using such intense symbolism...for me it most of all speaks of change...inside/around me.
I had loads of dreams when i had an awakening almost 20 years ago. I learned to interpret back then, learning that there are several ways of interpreting and that they are multi-layered like you wrote. As time passes, so can interpretation of the older dreams change as well. And for lots of dreams: i seem to dream a lot for the future.

But right now...they clearly are about change...renovations...saying goodbye...leaving stuff behind...and what this suicide dream concerns: it could also be about trying to see if i have the courage to really change...do i have to guts to symbolically die...

[Osyris]

The concept of death, even symbolically, only triggers the basic instinct of self-preservation. This alone is enough to make our subconscious (the 80% of our psyche) to negate/sabotage any thoughts/courses of action regarding death/suicide of our ego/self.
I've been on this path some time ago, and for me only one trick worked. I had to release old dysfunctional pattenrs which would prove to be my undoing, constantly steering towards toxic people, mostly because my inner issues drove me towards them...like attracts like etc. So i had to "kill" my old self...in order to survive. So the concept that eventually allowed me to do this was to link the archetype of death to the one of rebirth, realizing this is a universal pattern. Death of something only means making room for the birth of the new. And yes....it's as scary as standing on the edge of a cliff, having to walk on air, a leap of faith.
Indeed, your dreams speak of change, your subconscious repeatedly states this to you. Revise older dreams and re-interpret them, understand that a new You only awaits to emerge/be born...but this will only happen when the Old is permitted to rest...it's so damn scary and way easier said than done i know ! But it's well worth it, trust me ;)

Thanks for your thoughts Osyris!

I think that is what is happening to me right now. Or ´to me´...the choice for change is up to me. The first step i made today...i feel so weird inside: both sad and happy, both relaxed and nervous, i could scream out loud feeling both angry and so enthousiastic, i smile, but also cry like a baby.

I think i already have known deep inside that this was coming someday, but never knew in what form and when.

[Osyris]

Maybe it would be a good idea to start a private journal in which you document it all, express your thoughts and emotions and not keep it bottled up inside. Release everything in there knowing its your personal space, even your darkest thoughts will find an outlet this way.
Turbulence inside is expected, every birth has its pains but invariably leads to better places, although scary, intense and painful often.
As for knowing the shapes of things to come beforehand...that would take all the fun out of life eh ? ;)

[Mahdi El-Mirak]

Take a warm bath and rinse this bad dream from you. It will not bother you anymore.