No Support Over Eulogy

[Berry]

I'm so sorry for your loss. You and your son are very blessed and loved to maintain a relationship with your Grandma and to write and say an eulogy for her. I was never given the opportunity to go to my grandparents' funerals.

Originally Posted by Berry

I'm so sorry for your loss. You and your son are very blessed and loved to maintain a relationship with your Grandma and to write and say an eulogy for her. I was never given the opportunity to go to my grandparents' funerals.

Thank you dear for your support.

Hello there, coolchic101. I really connected to your venting, and totally support them. I hear how hard you are working to honour your loving memories of your Grandmother and to navigate what seems to be very confusing and painful behaviours from your younger sister.

Aren't families funny things? We share blood with these people yet can feel so disconnected from them. I got a sense of your sister of being a person whose own emotions are, sadly, shut down. She has sealed up her heart! (So it seems to me). I have such compassion for people who do that because they are really robbing themselves of the wonderful, moving human experiences those of us with open hearts can go through.

Yet I understand people who seal off their hearts - the ones I know have done so to "protect" themselves from their own hurt. Your words made me perceive your sister as "fake" - ie, disconnected from their own personhood/soul, and there appears to be a focus on her physicality, with her "attractive" appearance, short dress worn at a funeral, and "showing off" her boyfriend. A close friend of mine was very much focussed on her physicality until the death of her own father seemed to shake her into a more spiritual connection to life. But you are right that people ain't gonna change unless they want to - or in some cases, get a spiritual intervention like a life-altering experience.

I hope you can keep honouring your own Spirit and your grieving process for your beloved Grandmother, because this process is about your spiritual journey. I wonder if some of your sister's behaviours are teachers for you - rough and "challenging" yet if you keep checking inside with a tender heart and loving intentions, maybe you might find a way to love her in a way that empowers and honours you, if not allowing you to understand her.

Light and love to you and yours.