Ex-Lovers/Ex-Spouses On the Other Side

Originally Posted by coolchic101

Interesting question. Let's say you are divorced and you don't like your ex. Do you have to see them once you're both on the Other Side? I mean it wouldn't be Heaven if you bump into your ex right? LOL

Another scenario. Let's say you passed away first and your widowed spouse remarries, would you get jealous in Heaven that someone has taken your place?

I understand we will not be able to know this until we're actually "there". What are your thoughts?

No, I wouldn't get jealous.
I already wished him happiness should he find somebody else to love
and still would wish him well anyhow.
Don't know about finding a husband/wife we had in heaven,
but one thing is for sure, the way to God is not a trip for a couples.
You are responsible for own spiritual developement.

Peace and Love be with you

[annonafox]

I have pondered this topic a lot-- I have a lot of questions--but I have read many accounts of the afterlife--or maybe more correctly--the "ïn between life" that seem to show that we have a soul "family"---a group of souls we incarnate with throughout time. In different lifetimes, our roles to each other change. We do seem to have a primary soulmate, but that relationship may not always be romantic in the physical form. We also interact with other souls from different soul families outside of our own family----but we are closest to the souls in our own "branch" as it were.

The books that best explained the complexity of our soul attachments were Destiny of Souls and Journey of Souls by Dr. Newton.

That being said, I still have insecurities and questions and confusions---especially when I think of Matt---I admit I feel sad thinking he is somehow "detached" from his human emotions, in that he no longer feels those human romantic longings like he did here. I guess I try not to think too much about it or else I feel too sad....I know he would want me to be happy, and I do want to be happy......I do miss romance and feeling that comfort, but at the same time, it always touches my heart with a little sadness to think of someone else coming into my life.....So I am kind of in hiding these days----but I am still alive and want to live and feel and create......

Got a little sidetracked there! :) But I always recommend the Dr. Newton books to people---they are so beautiful and hopeful and explain so much, even those intricate little questions like the ones posed here.

[Dragonfly1]

Originally Posted by annonafox

I have pondered this topic a lot-- I have a lot of questions--but I have read many accounts of the afterlife--or maybe more correctly--the "ïn between life" that seem to show that we have a soul "family"---a group of souls we incarnate with throughout time. In different lifetimes, our roles to each other change. We do seem to have a primary soulmate, but that relationship may not always be romantic in the physical form. We also interact with other souls from different soul families outside of our own family----but we are closest to the souls in our own "branch" as it were.

The books that best explained the complexity of our soul attachments were Destiny of Souls and Journey of Souls by Dr. Newton.

That being said, I still have insecurities and questions and confusions---especially when I think of Matt---I admit I feel sad thinking he is somehow "detached" from his human emotions, in that he no longer feels those human romantic longings like he did here. I guess I try not to think too much about it or else I feel too sad....I know he would want me to be happy, and I do want to be happy......I do miss romance and feeling that comfort, but at the same time, it always touches my heart with a little sadness to think of someone else coming into my life.....So I am kind of in hiding these days----but I am still alive and want to live and feel and create......

Got a little sidetracked there! :) But I always recommend the Dr. Newton books to people---they are so beautiful and hopeful and explain so much, even those intricate little questions like the ones posed here.

My heart goes out to you with understanding........it is only very early days for you in your grief.....when i lost my husband i was only 24 and it took me a very long time to go through the grieving process.....i did begin a relationship about 4 years after his passing, but in hindsight i know this wasn't what i should have done for myself or my partner......it took me 10 years to eventually come to terms with his passing and to actually be able to think about him without longing and tears......grieving is a very personal thing, and it takes as long as it takes, there is no set time limit......so whatever brings you the most comfort is what you need to do......thank you for the book recommendations, i will take a look at them.......many many blessings to you xxoo

[Wandering_Star]

Originally Posted by annonafox

The books that best explained the complexity of our soul attachments were Destiny of Souls and Journey of Souls by Dr. Newton.

I love these books, and can't recommend them enough.

That being said, I still have insecurities and questions and confusions---especially when I think of Matt---I admit I feel sad thinking he is somehow "detached" from his human emotions, in that he no longer feels those human romantic longings like he did here. I guess I try not to think too much about it or else I feel too sad....

My best friend died twelve years ago. We'd been lovers for five years, but for very earthbound reasons it didn't work out. We adored each other, however, and remained the closest of friends for the five years between our romantic breakup and his death.

A few days after he died, he paid me a visit (which I described on the "After Death Communications" thread). And one thing that has stayed with me in the 12 years since is the incredible feeling of pure love I received from him.

When he was alive, I knew he loved me, and when he died I was heartbroken that I wouldn't get to experience that love any longer. But what came through in that moment was amazing. Free of his earthly body, he had a higher soul-perspective about what had happened in his life on earth. He was able to see me for who I really am, too, and fully understand our relationship in this life. The presence I felt was definitely him, but in a pure, clarified form, free of all the heaviness he'd accumulated in his earthly life. He understood everything, and there was no reason for me to feel guilt, regret, or sadness.

Romantic love here on earth is great. But like every other earth-emotion, it's...messy. Even when it's beautiful and stirs your soul and you think it can't get any better, there's still earth-stuff cluttering it up.

Matt loves you. It might not be the "romantic" love we know here, but I can tell you this: it's better. It's perfect understanding of you and your journey here, and what you came here to accomplish--before you met him here, while you knew him here, and after he left. The soul that was Matt for you in this life still loves you, and wants you to be happy and live your life here as fully as you can.

Words are really weak when it comes to expressing this. I just read what I wrote, and it feels so...limp. I can't get the power of that kind of love across in words--it's just not possible. So I don't know if anything I've just said will be even remotely helpful (and I'm just going to have to cross my fingers and hope that it hasn't been hurtful). But know this: He loves you, beyond anything I am capable of expressing, and probably beyond any human ability to comprehend.

[Wandering_Star]

Okay, now to answer the OP's question...

Originally Posted by coolchic101

Interesting question. Let's say you are divorced and you don't like your ex. Do you have to see them once you're both on the Other Side? I mean it wouldn't be Heaven if you bump into your ex right? LOL

Before we come here, we make soul agreements with others. We agree to incarnate together, and experience life here in different roles that will help each of us in our growth and development as souls.

But in the process of coming into this life, we forget those agreements and forget our prior existence. Yet we still end up encountering those souls we agreed to incarnate with, and we still share experiences that are meant to aid in our soul's evolution--such as marrying and divorcing each other. Those experiences, and the relationships we have while incarnated, may seem negative while we're here.

But once we've finished and crossed back over, we all remember our agreements. So if you were to meet the soul who played the part of your ex-husband, or a despised ex-mother-in-law, on the other side, you'd probably get a good laugh out of it all and there would be no hard feelings. Disliking someone, and not wanting to see them again, are earthbound, embodied, human emotions. They're created by our ego-selves here on earth, and when our souls return they leave them behind just as they leave the physical bodies they occupied while here.

Another scenario. Let's say you passed away first and your widowed spouse remarries, would you get jealous in Heaven that someone has taken your place?

Same thing. The soul's perspective is eternal, and jealousy is an emotion brought about by the extremely limited perspective we have while incarnated as humans, here on earth. We're pretty much blind, here, so we believe there is cause for jealousy, or fear that our place has been taken. But the soul knows better.

That is what I needed to know.

Thank you.
Deepsea.

This task is very difficult to guess your mate mind.