Process of Crossing

[Lynn]

Hello

I have always found the process of crossing over an interesting journey and process. Its not so cut and dried as you die and off you go at times it would seem for some its a process or almost a test they have to go though first.

It has been an interesting time with the passing of the EX husband and how his journey has unfolded. Carefully monitored by myself an Daughter and a good friend and fellow Medium.

He was not a nice person in life so in his passing (he was alone when he died suddenly from a heart attack in his sleep it was said. So it was a time before he was found dead.

I was told that before he could cross over or be crossed over he had some work be done here before he left. I have come accross this in working with other spirits in the past. So I was aware of this issue. Yet when its someone you know and had valid fears around its not fun to process through it all.

It would seem that he had some EGO thoughts to process about what was thought of him in life and how he treated family and friends. The eldest of his kids did see him not long before he passed and got a so so apolgy for being "not the best Father" in life. The other 2 never had anything to do with him as the abuse was just too deep. An apology would have been a hollow event. So he lingered around us all for a time being rather nasty at times.

It was so bad that his Memorial Page had to be taken down by the Funeral Home as no comments were made by those that knew him but "Likes" and "Love" I icons as they were pleased he was gone. Not even his own family made up a page for him, yet it was done for his siblings that went before him.

What he left behind is a lot of healing to be done by his daughter whom he abused. She is happy and more at ease now that he has crossed over. He see's it as he did nothing wrong. Even to the point where I heard he would tell others "Lynn like to fight with me" I guess I earned the beatings, sexual misconducts I got in life. So be it, it made me whom I am today a strong woman and stronger mother.

He had to hear what he did was wrong, to understand maybe on some level that he was wrong in doing what he did to others. That EGO and booze ruled his life and that he did have issues there. To see that in threats and control you in the end loose that control.

We were finally able to cross him over about a week ago now and we feel the energy being a lot lighter around us. Now the estate I feel will flow into being done a lot more with ease. Still have a process there to get past as I have nothing to do with it all. Nor do the kids, its in the hands of a family friend (that can not be trusted by us) but no matter what the EX did this person had his back. Even in criminal acts done, it did not matter.

What is left behind sadly is more healing for others that will have to be done. Too I know that other's have had their paths with him and had choices there to make and at times maybe the wrong one's unfolded.

There will be some unresolved legal challenges (now that his is dead) he will not be facing in trials. Those are now trials for the after life. No day in court for some but too seeing how the past issues unfolded and how good at the "game" he was I have assured them its a blessing he died instead of a trial. The outcomes have always been in his favor.

What I have learned is that we do so reap what we sow in life on Earth and we do carry that with us in death. Work hard on yourself in life, try to SEE whom you truly are ! This means at times really looking at your actions and what other's say about you while your living. I get that for most you will not see that what is said about you is true. Rose colored glasses are on.

Blessings he is GONE and I am free. Now I can write my book about my life and maybe show others that there are times when you need to walk through a lot of darkness in your life to survive and thrive.

Lynn

[Native spirit]

That is so true Lynn, To me the key word here is Healing and I am sending Healing to you and your family.


Namaste

[kris]

"Evil bears fruit with certainty just like a heavy meal affects the stomach." This is from a book about 3,300 years old, that I am translating.

[Starman]

He, or that which inhabited that male body, will probably be back in another form, or maybe not. For a long time I wondered why was I born into the family which I was born into, because I frequently experienced physical abuse, verbal abuse, and emotional abuse, growing up in my parents home. A part of me died from all of that abuse and the healing process was for me to bring that part which was murdered by abuse, back to life. Easier said then done.

Growing up in the 1950’s there were no social workers or other adults who came to my aid. It was very painful day after day and I grew up with a lot of anger and resentment. Then I was placed in foster care by a family court judge because I kept running away from home, and in foster care I was abused by my foster parents, who were pedophiles, but it was never reported; because I felt I would not be believed.

So I had a deep longing to try and understand why did I have to go through what I did at a very young age; was there some deeper reason or significance to the things which happened to me? After all I was just a little kid, what did I do to deserve this? I am at peace with myself now but it took a long time living with pain and anger, and no answers, which definitely effected adult relationships which I had. I finally learned that life is not about what we deserve or not deserve.

As a former counselor, I worked with a woman who had been raped, and the rapist was arrested, but he was released on bail and then took his own life. The woman who was raped by him was furious that he died and did not face a judge and jury in this world. She had a harder time healing because she felt her abuser had escaped justice. She wanted him to feel the pain that she felt. She wanted him to suffer, but he died by his own hand.

It is my belief, and as is written in the Hebrew Kabbalah, when a person dies the process of them crossing over involves a review of their life here on Earth, and in that review the person, soul, or consciousness, experiences how what they did here on Earth impacted others. Regardless whether that impact was considered good or bad. After physical death, the review of our lives is not devoid of the experiences which we gave to others.

Healing here on Earth takes time, because our mind, body, and emotions, are caught in time. It can be a painful journey, or at least mine was. But healing is also a necessary journey. That we bring the past forward to our current existence says to me that our entire past stays with us, conditions us, even after physical death. As in death all we experience is ourselves. In my opinion.

Blessings go with you and yours on your journey.

[Native spirit]

You can tell you were a Counselor by how you speak, and the deep Empathy you have about you.
I was never abused physically mentally it was a different story I always said from a very young child that i was placed with the wrong family the wrong country etc.
I to ran away from home i went to live with my grandmother because they didn't understand me at home i was told i was stupid why?
Because i was born seeing and hearing spirit.

I to am a counselor and our lives mirror each other in many ways.I remember a friend,s grandson was in an Accident he was in a comma,
I connected with him straight away he told me he was spending more time in the spirit world than he was in this world.
He wanted the machines turned off he wanted to go.he had made peace with
his actions in this world .
He passed two weeks later.

Namaste

[Starman]

In retrospect I know I got into the counseling profession to find tools so I could work on myself, and along the way I was also able to help others. It is my experience that most people who have deep spiritual experiences came out of a family that had some kind of abuse or intolerable dysfunction.

It can stifle us or shut us down, but even in the dastardly onslaught of pain born from those who society says should cherish us, we can still come to nurture our deeper being, heal that pain and rise above the way we may have thought things should have been.

Children have such a magical relationship with their parents, and when that magic is shattered by distrust, it has a profound impact on our world. A lost of innocence, etc. I found it interesting when Carrie Fisher died from sleep apnea on an airplane coming from London going to New York.

Her mother, Debbie Reynolds, said she just wanted to be with her daughter, and she died shortly after the death of Carrie Fisher. It was almost like she willed herself to die because she wanted to be with her daughter. A bond of love that transcended physical existence.

I too spent a lot of time in the spirit world when I was younger, as a refuge from the non-acceptance I experienced in this physical world. I feel blessed to have had that option. Because the betrayal of those who may be closest to us can be almost unbearable.

Namaste

[Redchic12]

Omg Starman what an horrific childhood that must have been. It’s hard to believe what some people have done to their kids. How on earth could you come out of all of that and be such a well balanced person that you are today! Most people would end up on drugs or in prison or both!

I so admire you for all the work that you have done with yourself and not bought into the victim game cos God knows no one would blame you.

You amaze me!

[Redchic12]

Starman. Was just thinking, have you found out why you chose to experience that childhood or was it karmic? Gotta be some reason for all that misery.

[Starman]

Its’ only misery if you are stuck in it. We are all trying to free ourselves from one thing or another in my opinion, and those who have greatly suffered have the opportunity to feel very deeply. Everything is useful, including our suffering, but too many people suffer long over their suffering instead of learning from their suffering. In my opinion the only thing to learn is about ourselves; wisdom begins with self knowledge.

What I went through in my childhood was beyond reasoning, although along the way I did entertain lots of rationalizations. In the end I felt deeply that I had to forgive my abusers, but it took time for me to get to that point. I forgive them for my sake because I do not want to harbor ill feelings towards anyone. We give to each other the work, or lack of work, that we have done on ourselves’ and my abusers had a lack of work on themselves which they projected onto me.

That is the only logic and reasoning which I am willing to embrace. We are all coming out of the “dark ages,” it was not that long ago that human civilization was more horrible then it is today, and even today in places like Afghanistan there is no such thing as a pedophile. The Taliban permit’s a 6-year old girl to legally marry a 50-year old man. This is going on today in other countries as well. Women have no rights and can be legally killed if they shame their family in some countries. It amazes me how resilient little children are who grow up in a war zone and have lost family members..

When I was growing up here in the U.S. parents had the right to abuse their children and men could legally beat their wife; this was in the 1950‘s and prior to that. There were no laws against it. I believe firmly that if a person is alive here on Earth, they have work to do on themselves, some do the work while others do not. It took decades for me to get the insights which I have today and even today I am still growing and working on myself. I guess I may find out if there were any reasons for what I went through on the day my body dies. But right now I have all but put it behind me.

[pixiedust]

I’m really sorry.