BAD ATTRACTION

Hey everybody...

Not sure if this would belong in this section because this to do with the law of attraction. And I hate to do this on a first post. But...

Before I go on I want to explain a few things...

I'm physically challenged
I'm high-functioning autistic
I'm asexual and a-romantic {and in fact I'm sex-repulsed}
I practice spiritual communication
I'm uncomfortable around those who use certain substances {marijuana to be specific and to some extent alcohol}
I'm uncomfortable around people with most psychiatric disorders {exceptions to the rule are D.I.D...psychogenic amnesia...and those recovering from attachment conditioning related things}
I'm VERY interested in criminal profiling and criminal psych. But I have a strong aversion toward most of those who practice on the clinical side of the profession {won't get into the '"why" on that in this post}

I'm sort of wondering if {in terms of friendship} the wrong people or wrong types of people are attracted to me for some reason or I'm attracting them. Not all of my friendships have been like this. But anyway...

The first of these was my {now former} best friend We met in preschool and reunited when I was in second grade. We were really close for several years {although she was the only friend I had that my grandparents wouldn't allow to come over to their house while I lived with them...I didn't get why back then but I get why now}. Then I moved with my mother...sister...and my stepfather to California for six years. So and I only had contact occasionally until my family and I moved back to Seattle. Mainly at summer camp and during the holidays. After we moved back to Seattle...when was in her teens and during several different summer camp sessions...she started engaging in and exhibiting crude humor and crude behavior. Even though I continued to associate with ..and even though I wasn't the target of this behavior...I wasn't comfortable with it. Mainly because I knew something was wrong with it. Then when I was sixteen...assaulted me physically. Shortly after that I started developing an interest in true crime and criminal psych...

At the summer camp I attended...I met two other friends.... I lost touch with when he graduated from the summer camp program. And remained acquainted with Although we became almost like brother and sister for awhile...alarm bells should have gone off for me. Partly because had a fascination with fighting and violence. He actually wanted to teach me to fight. Which btw didn't pan out because I had no interest in that {and still don't}. He tried to convert me to becoming sexual when that didn't happen. I don't think I can go into detail without getting explicit. So I'm not going into detail. But when that didn't work...he started ignoring me and I severed that tie...

Then a couple of years ago...I was doing a web search for a musician for a couple of projects because I needed a guitar player. We began prepping together and became friends over a period of two years. Prepping while I tried to find a spot for him. And everything went great {for the most part} initially. Then once I found him a role and started sending him material to work on...nothing much was happening with it and I began seeing sexualized jokes from him on my Facebook feed. I wouldn't have said anything here except that these projects are tied to the spiritual communication work that I do {the simplest way to explain that is that I get visitations from spirits who come through and ask me to tell their stories...and btw I call these spirits "clients"}. Some are well-known and others are completely unknown. When I read the first joke...I didn't really think about it. But then the next one was different. I called this one the "bard-and-rogue" joke. When I saw that on my feed...my stomach turned over because a big part of doing this work is creating dignity-based portrayals. Another thing that I worried about in the back of my mind after finding this "bard-and-rogue" joke was the remote possibility that this could be a form of backlash. And then the material that he was posting became more lurid. So even though this guy told me that he didn't know that this would be a problem...I stopped communicating with him. Then five months later he sent me a text that went along the lines of "how are you doing? it's been five months and I was concerned". I texted this guy back and told him that the material he was posting made me uneasy because I've been studying criminal psych and criminal profiling on my own for several years. And although he apologized...I told him that I thought he was trying to snow me. This guy was heavily into psychobabble. And when I told him that he came back to me with "I'm sorry for triggering you". At that point I stopped communicating with him for good because I believe that he was posting this material for the purposed of shocking whoever found it...

So now I've got a question. Specifically...

Is it possible to attract the wrong people?

Input would be great!
Thanks!
Red

PS: Sorry for the color change and enlarged font. But doing that because of a sight impairment. My topic titles are in allcaps for the same reason. Thanks!

[Guillaume]

Hi Red, and welcome!

To answer your question directly: yes.
The way you think, what you think about, your energy, your mood, all of that attracts and repulses people and situations. And to a huge extent, probably way beyond what you can imagine.

So if you study criminology, you will end up seeing a world of crimes.
If you believe sex is important, you will see the world in a sexualized way.
If you think people make jokes on you, you will attract these situations.

It's about fear. If you meet a wandering dog and start running away, the dog will chase you.

[Guillaume]

To continue on my post
All these beliefs and thoughts that you built in your mind, or that others transmitted to you,
they can be "unlearned", you can rewire yourself.

For that you can subscribe to my program, it has 10 lessons, each of them $1000
No, just kidding!!

For that the solution is to sit and meditate. Let go of your thoughts. Still your mind.
It takes hours and hours of meditation to let go and become peaceful.
And then you will attract love, good people, good energy etc etc.
You may also need to let go of bad relationships with some people, because people around you may transmit negativity to you, and it way affect you. And bad habits also.

[RedEmbers]

I find the easiest way to do it is to choose different people. People who make me feel happy being myself. The more people I feel happy around, the fewer undesirable people I have around me and the small amount of undesirable people feel much less of a burden to me.

It is about what I choose to focus on and gather evidence in support of. So I consciously choose people who love, understand and support my best interests and then I gather all the evidence I need about how I am loved, supported and surrounded by people/places and things who want to understand me and have my best interests at heart.

Haha... I have adhd and and asd (my adhd is more challenging for me).
My therapist pretty much stopped all business with me as soon as he said these words to me "it's all about what I choose to focus on".

As soon as I choose a focus, it becomes my reality.

[Guillaume]

Originally Posted by RedEmbers

As soon as I choose a focus, it becomes my reality.

Yes, this is it!!

[lostsoul13]

Celibacy is a definite must for me while in reincarnation _ I think you can have relationships with intimacy like kissing but seen as a death by cause and affect I believe we should be connected on soul level- like recognising the person for who they are is important for intimacy… holding hands, kissing, hugging, massages… going out - dinners—- arts and crafts, holidays… there more to a relationship than sex…

You will meet the right one but when your ready—- no one should have to live with inserts or for forcefulness’ and many circumstances give way to that cause and affect…

It’s great your meeting new propels and I don’t see anything wrong in you cutting or the unhealthy relationships- no one should have to move that fast… unless you don’t have time—- but you seem to have time…


Love your username _ reminds me of lana del ray blue banisters - great album!!*

[saurab]

Originally Posted by RedThunderbird

Shortly after that I started developing an interest in true crime and criminal psych...<snipped...>
So now I've got a question. Specifically...Is it possible to attract the wrong people?

It seems that your interest in crime is at least partly responsible for attracting the wrong kind of people. I dont know what your insights are on criminal psychology, but if you delve too deeply into that, you could be inviting trouble. As the Buddha said.... What you think you become. This quote doesnt exactly apply to you because you are not a criminal, but in a way criminals are part of your life, so in a way that's true even for you.

Another possibility is that the universe may be sending you these kind of people so that you could help them heal themselves.

Sorry you feel it is bad people you attract to yourself but if you think about it you gotta have good people too in your life that you attract, no? That is at least how it is for me, I attract both. I also connect to different parts, qualities, personality quirks, in someone than I do differently to someone else. Every human being has one layer after another, and it is a mix, someone can be both good and bad, the good are the wisdom it already has and the bad the ignorance, to me, that's how I read it.

Please try not to isolate yourself thinking that is the only type of friends you do attract, because I simply don't think that's true.

The only thing one can do is to state your case when someone says, do a bad thing towards you and if it is worth throwing the friendship aboard. In some cases it is and in others it isn't, that's all up to you, don't loose touch with yourself and what you find is accepted behavior and not in a friend.

I have for instance a soft side to me and a "rebel" side to me, my soft side attract good people but it too attracts people who think they can have their way with me - that is until I show my rebel side or my strong side, when I put up boundaries, than usually when they get that they skip right out of there. Had I let these bad people dominate the show and think it is only them I attract - that's when they would have won, for sure. But the others good ones are there too...:)

[girlsearching]

27-12-2021, 07:30 AM

Guillaume*

Experiencer

Join Date: May 2021

Location: Europe

Posts: 465

*

Hi Red, and welcome!

To answer your question directly: yes.
The way you think, what you think about, your energy, your mood, all of that attracts and repulses people and situations. And to a huge extent, probably way beyond what you can imagine.

So if you study criminology, you will end up seeing a world of crimes.
If you believe sex is important, you will see the world in a sexualized way.
If you think people make jokes on you, you will attract these situations.

It's about fear. If you meet a wandering dog and start running away, the dog will chase you.

I agree with your post, it is really about the energy a person gives off.