Another family's karma?

I've become part of a family where I first of all thought later that maybe I was introduced too early to, but at the time my husband (then my boyfriend) insisted on it.

I was told very little and because they had their lives and we had our lives and I was young and dumb I did not request more information. Not sure I would have gotten it back then either, because that actually meant you had to be aware. I was used to dealing with normal people or somewhat and did not think I was going to have an issue.

I have not felt that I have been given a fair deal over time.

I have come to understand that I have symbolized a sort of rebellion or the I-don't-care-attitude, not from me but from my husband.

I am close to everyone except one family member on his side who use to rule the show with all the manipulating tools thinkable and where everyone else over and over would clean up the mess this person made. There were never no consequences for this person to pay. They have also sadly been victims of it and in my opinion their boundaries were not where they ought to have been.

I don't feel I have done anything to provoke this. It was like this from the very beginning. The only thing I used to think is that the family still missed someone else that use to be in the role I had now entered and I was this symbol that this person was out, but I can't be sure about that.

The vulnerability I had coming into this family was that I was once very much in love with my boyfriend, later husband, loved him very much, and wanted to be approved off, at least that. My fear was that he would start to view me the same way his bully-family-member did and that I would loose him. He on the other hand made no communication, revealed nothing to me about his "perfect" family. They had to be perfect. He had been groomed since birth. He was not aware. Sometimes to me it seemed as if he stood with one foot in and the other one out but that he thought he had both feet out.

To me this is now a thing of the past and I am no longer hurt or sad about it and do not let under any circumstance the person who use to get to me - to do just that.

Has anyone else experienced they have not been given a fair deal when it comes to other people's family or families? Why is their karma (which I think it is about) splashing all over to me or us for?

[CosmicWonder]

Old souls sometimes take on karma from others.

Much kindness,

CW

[lostsoul13]

I’ve had my fair share of foster family’s and abuse still being present, adopted- abuse still present.. I was in sandwich theory with children when this occurred.. and I took on the karma- it happens all the time over the world , some one bigger,wiser,more able taking the slack.. I think it’s Devine intervention..

Reincarnation is the hardest.. being in a avarta that you can’t relate too and still feeling pain {their pain} happens all the time.. your probably not alone..

Furthermore; we live in chaos theory and butterfly affect- one small act can have unmentioned repercussions in the future… imo

Cosmicwonder, I never heard that before but it sounds both beautiful and tragic all at once, not sure it applies to me though (I wish!), LOL.

Lostsoul13, so sad everything you've been through and survived and still today you never come across as someone who is mean to other people and so on, it's impressive.

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I think what it has taught me (among other things) is to truly listen to myself and trust my inner voice, and not like before to be taking too much consideration to others and their situations and feelings, and not expressing my own. I know I once asked my husband "Have you ever thought what it is like to be in my shoes, to come into a family like that?". He hadn't. He was part of the disease before and not part of the cure. Now he is different and there is no struggle or confusion or any vulnerability anymore.

I am happy that the other family members were not to be fooled, and further more that their families that some of them come from have always treated me well. They would warn me time and time again that this family member was talking behind my back and would make up stuff. There were other figures of true authority from the other families who saw through what this was really about. One mistake I made is that I would not give other people enough credit for figuring this out on their own. I thought they would not care or they would be manipulated to think things about me that were not true, but they all came through. In time someone like that will be making a mistake and it's true face will then be exposed. Then again I try to think that that person has it most difficult with itself, and not with me or nobody else.