It's all starting to make sense and I don't know how to feel

[eyesopen2020]

*Editing because I tend to get carried away and my original post was mumbled (I really am trying to get better). I also want to state that my "spiritual journey" all started only about two and a half months ago when I casually went to a psychic and was blown away by the insight I was given. After that it seemed like things started falling into place.

To sum up: I think my Grandmother who passed on years ago is my guardian angel and I see her signs everywhere. I have had a very difficult life and honestly thought I was being punished by God. For the last several years I have gone through quite an awakening to my reality and a lot of it has to do with a person I have become very close and recently discovered that he is possibly my twin flame. Both of our lives have been upended, mine for the better and his for the worse. There are really specific signs pointing directly to him from what I consider my angel number and other readings (details below) and I feel like I unknowingly manifested him into my life.

On one hand, I feel really honored that my grandmother is there as my angel along with others to protect me and that I am in this great space (most of the time) but on the other hand, feel really guilty that I may have meddled in someone else's life and hurt them just because my life was messed up. I am really upset about this because I have genuine love and care deeply for the well-being of this person and know he is in a great deal of pain. Even though he originally approached me, I can't help but blame myself for this and am trying to figure out why this situation would present itself the way it has.

Just looking for any insight from anyone =).

Further details below about my angel number 23 and crazy specific Twin Flame coincidences:

I see the number 23 EVERYWHERE and the frequency has increased. I looked it up and the angel number is to follow your heart and do something you love:

- The day my friend messaged me his profile pic was of a basketball player wearing a jersey with the number 23.

- I was watching a general pick a card reading on YouTube and the energy they were describing was definitely of my soon to be ex. He is a narcissitic, emotionally abusive, cheating liar that bankrupted us. The card she picked up was one of a person getting attacked by bees. She goes on to say that she sees the bees as the Egyptian Sun God Ra and my ancestors sent him specifically to attack this person for depleting my abundance and to protect me. That is literally who my friend is named after - Ra. In fact when we started talking, I remembered thinking how perfect I thought he was and that he was my husband's worst nightmare.

- Most importantly, with or without anything that I have learned from a spiritual sense: I have been with my h for 16 years and although I saw the red flags, I ignored them. I would have never actually caught what he was doing had it not been for my friend and I certainly would have never had the strength and courage (at least at the time) to do something about it if it weren't for him. I literally owe it to him for saving me from my awful marriage.

Other interesting and important number 23s for me:

- My youngest son is a double rainbow baby and was born on his due date, 1/23/13, none of my other three were even close to their due date (I prayed to my Gram about him too)

- I found my Grandmother when I went to pick her up on Christmas day but I know she died on 12/23 and that was the last day I saw her (It had snowed that night and there weren't any footprints, she would have gone out). My Gram was very special to me and I asked her to be my guardian angel before she died. She used to have religious dreams and was such a wonderfully genuine person with the kindest eyes. Her life was very tough too and people used to make fun of her and think she was crazy. I would pray to her and ask her to help me with this situation and that it would end the way it was supposed to. When I recently went to that psychic reading, he told me that my Grandmother was reminding me that I was just like her and to have faith. I am trying but feel like all of this is too crazy and I have only told one person because I feel like I am making this up.

Sorry this is so long and I have so many questions...

[one-light]

Warm welcome here eyesopen2020 - you have a good edit time on here if you want to space the block of text out a little using edit button... seems like you've done a lot of learning there on life's journey - I'll have a read later, off on my bike in the fog for a bit - you'll get some replies I'm sure...

[one-light]

I had a read - confusion everywhere there... ohh we all know about that here - puzzles to solve eh, we all know about that issue and fitting the pieces in - some people here will have advise for you...

[eyesopen2020]

Originally Posted by one-light

I had a read - confusion everywhere there... ohh we all know about that here - puzzles to solve eh, we all know about that issue and fitting the pieces in - some people here will have advise for you...

Sorry! I tend to get carried away. I just feel like there is so much lol. I tried to break it up and put a summary at the top

[one-light]

Its ok, you'll get used to it - I totally understand when someone has so much on their mind, just want to get it all written down... if you don't get more replies on here, you'll get answers on here on other posts... I remember one of my early posts on here 'so I have 3 questions' not a single reply lol - suggestions and answers will come, you're on here to get help and answers, which is a good start...

[BookieBook]

Agree with one-light. And if there's so much going on in our minds, it's better to let it out, share it with someone you trust or here in our forum because we got a lot of willing listeners to help you feel better.

[eyesopen2020]

lol - ok neither of you are making me feel better. Did I somehow manifest this person and just make my life better and bring him pain? I feel guilty - Are these just coincidences or do these seem very much purposeful? Is it my fault?

[ThatMan]

Originally Posted by eyesopen2020

*Editing because I tend to get carried away and my original post was mumbled (I really am trying to get better). I also want to state that my "spiritual journey" all started only about two and a half months ago when I casually went to a psychic and was blown away by the insight I was given. After that it seemed like things started falling into place.

To sum up: I think my Grandmother who passed on years ago is my guardian angel and I see her signs everywhere. I have had a very difficult life and honestly thought I was being punished by God. For the last several years I have gone through quite an awakening to my reality and a lot of it has to do with a person I have become very close and recently discovered that he is possibly my twin flame. Both of our lives have been upended, mine for the better and his for the worse. There are really specific signs pointing directly to him from what I consider my angel number and other readings (details below) and I feel like I unknowingly manifested him into my life.

On one hand, I feel really honored that my grandmother is there as my angel along with others to protect me and that I am in this great space (most of the time) but on the other hand, feel really guilty that I may have meddled in someone else's life and hurt them just because my life was messed up. I am really upset about this because I have genuine love and care deeply for the well-being of this person and know he is in a great deal of pain. Even though he originally approached me, I can't help but blame myself for this and am trying to figure out why this situation would present itself the way it has.

Just looking for any insight from anyone =).

Further details below about my angel number 23 and crazy specific Twin Flame coincidences:

I see the number 23 EVERYWHERE and the frequency has increased. I looked it up and the angel number is to follow your heart and do something you love:

- The day my friend messaged me his profile pic was of a basketball player wearing a jersey with the number 23.

- I was watching a general pick a card reading on YouTube and the energy they were describing was definitely of my soon to be ex. He is a narcissitic, emotionally abusive, cheating liar that bankrupted us. The card she picked up was one of a person getting attacked by bees. She goes on to say that she sees the bees as the Egyptian Sun God Ra and my ancestors sent him specifically to attack this person for depleting my abundance and to protect me. That is literally who my friend is named after - Ra. In fact when we started talking, I remembered thinking how perfect I thought he was and that he was my husband's worst nightmare.

- Most importantly, with or without anything that I have learned from a spiritual sense: I have been with my h for 16 years and although I saw the red flags, I ignored them. I would have never actually caught what he was doing had it not been for my friend and I certainly would have never had the strength and courage (at least at the time) to do something about it if it weren't for him. I literally owe it to him for saving me from my awful marriage.

Other interesting and important number 23s for me:

- My youngest son is a double rainbow baby and was born on his due date, 1/23/13, none of my other three were even close to their due date (I prayed to my Gram about him too)

- I found my Grandmother when I went to pick her up on Christmas day but I know she died on 12/23 and that was the last day I saw her (It had snowed that night and there weren't any footprints, she would have gone out). My Gram was very special to me and I asked her to be my guardian angel before she died. She used to have religious dreams and was such a wonderfully genuine person with the kindest eyes. Her life was very tough too and people used to make fun of her and think she was crazy. I would pray to her and ask her to help me with this situation and that it would end the way it was supposed to. When I recently went to that psychic reading, he told me that my Grandmother was reminding me that I was just like her and to have faith. I am trying but feel like all of this is too crazy and I have only told one person because I feel like I am making this up.

Sorry this is so long and I have so many questions...

You can try ask for your grandma to come in your dreams. My grandma died too. I loved her and she came to me first, I was the first who had a dream with her and then my sister, I met her in this golden white light, anyway, the thing is that if you ask her to come, she is going to come. It may take some time but when you expect the least, she will be there. I met my grandma many times and everytime I knew it was her, she was full of love and joy, just be careful, not all dreams with your grandma are really with your grandma. You will know when she will come.

You see 23, I've been seeing 33 for two years? Ha ha ha Almost everyday. I just stopped trying to understand its meaning but when I see it more than usual, I have a feeling that I am about to have some crazy experiences.

You are not making things up, you may also try to meditate for more insights into the spiritual world, into your inner world.

[eyesopen2020]

Originally Posted by asearcher

Did you hurt him because of what went on in your marriage? That you wanted to be with him but couldn't? I don't quite follow... if you have not hurt him enough you can heal him by just being kind and loving and too explaining your situation back then and how you feel now? You have romantic feelings for him, no? And now he's life is in a jam and you are finally happy getting out of your marriage? I am just trying to understand your situation and your relation with him, as to me it is somewhat fuzzy. You should not feel guilt because you are happy and he is unhappy. It is not as if when you are unhappy he will then automatically become happy.

It seem for one reason or another that people with some kind of gift out of the ordinary has family members prior to them to have been like that too, I can't say if it is that they will try to make the road smoother for the next generation or if it is something in the brain that one inherit that make some channel more easier to access. I can only say I have seen this take motion from one generation to the next.

You having a number that keeps poping up is too something many can relate to. Signs are just signs. You have free will and are more powerful than you realize. Sure it is wonderful to be given signs but they don't tell you what to do or what the right choice is, they are just there to support you and give you the notion you are not alone. For me both the good forces and low energy forces tend to like to give signs, and I would be extremely confused if I would start to analyze everything and let it dominate my choices. I would not go "What should I do?" and then give up your free will and not trust yourself, your own instinct of what to do. But that's me, maybe.

If this guy you want to not have hurt, but have is your twin flame or not - who am I to say - I just believe we are paired up with members of our soul group for one purpose or another, could be a period in our lives, could be for the rest of our lives.

I would say feel - and go with the flow - try not to think too much, if possible. Just live. All you can do now is make a mence from your position now in life, then it is up to him if he will accept or not. There is nothing else you can do.

Lots of people with some medium-gift has had remarkable pain in their lives, it is as if it either pushes something to happen or it is that they are that strong that they wish for that stronger obsticle to grow spiritually. I've read somewhere that before we come here and when one plans one's life we have advisers around us so we won't do too much pain in one life time as we then risk maybe commiting suicide, but I don't know, of course, if that is true.

Thank you - I guess to be quite frank, he was a big fat cheater and was perfectly happy being that. I was married to a big fat cheater and was not a cheater myself. Whatever title I want to say is the relationship is really irrelevant in the grand scheme of things because I do believe like you said, you get into your own head and start looking for things. I will say that the number 23, in general, is about following your dreams and ironically enough I have been thinking about a new career change that aligns with what I really want to do, and the fact the #23 corresponds with my friend? I don't know, I just try to look at certain things as coincidences but there seem to be so many.

This was a back and forth communication thing over the last several years, we never met mostly because I wouldn't and then when I was "ready", he wouldn't. But our line of communication was always open as we have private social media account for just the two of us and even though we haven't talked in weeks, he still checks it everyday (and obviously I do too). He is waiting for me to reach back out but I will not.

I just didn't know if this was like a one sided thing or if I was part of his "destiny" too. I do have faith and believe in the concept of these things but to consider myself to be even remotely special to that extent is hard for me to do so therefore I must be making it up that I am some part of a cosmic universal plan. I would feel terrible if somehow because I prayed for an outcome, I took someone else off of their path and made their life painful.

Does any of that make sense? I don't know how any of this works and wonder if I am trying to find extraordinary reasons for very ordinary circumstances.

Thanks!

[eyesopen2020]

Originally Posted by ThatMan

You can try ask for your grandma to come in your dreams. My grandma died too. I loved her and she came to me first, I was the first who had a dream with her and then my sister, I met her in this golden white light, anyway, the thing is that if you ask her to come, she is going to come. It may take some time but when you expect the least, she will be there. I met my grandma many times and everytime I knew it was her, she was full of love and joy, just be careful, not all dreams with your grandma are really with your grandma. You will know when she will come.

You see 23, I've been seeing 33 for two years? Ha ha ha Almost everyday. I just stopped trying to understand its meaning but when I see it more than usual, I have a feeling that I am about to have some crazy experiences.

You are not making things up, you may also try to meditate for more insights into the spiritual world, into your inner world.

Yes! So I moved to a different part of the country after my Gram passed away and I wasn't able to really "feel" her around much. My mother was in the hospital after an overdose many years ago and as I was getting onto the elevator leaving the ICU, I got an overwhelming scent of my grandmother. Logic tried to tell me that someone else must have just been there but one else around. The next morning when I was visiting my mom, she told me that Mrs. B came to see her. I said Mrs. B? And she said Yeah, you know, Your Grandma? I said oh yeah? How is she? She said Don't know - didn't ask.