Forgiveness

[Molearner]

Originally Posted by FallingLeaves

why is THAT necessary? Isn't it enough just to love each other? Rather than impose yet another idea of what each other has to do to be accepted?

Somehow you think love is the easiest thing to do ? Does your love have form ?
Is it verbal ? Is it simply good thoughts ?

I just wanted to up the OP https://www.spiritualforums.com/vb/s...79&postcount=1

Heh, server space and all that. FallingLeaves, Molearner, you both see the same thing in a different perspective.

It is enough to love each other. Until it's not anymore. At some points, events start creepin' up on you, and eventually it always comes down to that :

You can't believe you lived through that. You can't believe you let that happen to you.

But then again, before you realize all that, love is all you can do. Because love is blind and despite being understanding, it is unconditionnal !

Take it from a dude whose morphine addict mother was beating the "cramp" outta him, and alcoholic father once tried to rape him, and forgave 'em both. It's like Inavalan said : "You just don’t allow these people to continue to hurt you or make any difference in your life."

Forgiveness is a gift to yourself first !

[FallingLeaves]

Originally Posted by Molearner

Somehow you think love is the easiest thing to do ? Does your love have form ?
Is it verbal ? Is it simply good thoughts ?

love is not the easy thing to do... it is very difficult. Too often we want we want, and wanting what we want never includes room for others to want what they want as well... we feel threatened that we won't get what we want so we won't let others have what they want. For example.

[FallingLeaves]

Originally Posted by Just Tim

It's like Inavalan said : "You just don’t allow these people to continue to hurt you or make any difference in your life."

sometimes the best thing you can do for someone, is to let them hurt you. And contrary to popular opinion, there are also silver linings going along with such behavior.

Hmm. I don't quite understand what you mean but you seem to know what you're talking about. No one ever said there's only one way to go !

Originally Posted by FallingLeaves

sometimes the best thing you can do for someone, is to let them hurt you. And contrary to popular opinion, there are also silver linings going along with such behavior.

[Molearner]

Originally Posted by FallingLeaves

sometimes the best thing you can do for someone, is to let them hurt you. And contrary to popular opinion, there are also silver linings going along with such behavior.

FallingLeaves,

That is an insightful observation IMO. You did not articulate your reasoning for stating that and it might seem counterintuitive to many. The wisdom that I perceive is that it has the potential of Leading to a chain of events. First, in regards to the guilty party, it can possibly awaken their conscience and lead to metanoia....transformation of their mind....the first big step to spiritual progress.

For the aggrieved party it can lead to an attempt to encourage deeper understanding and experience a lesson in forgiveness. In short it is a call to put love in motion and bring it alive. In truth not only do we learn from our mistakes(sin) but we learn from the mistakes of others. And it can compel us to offer intercessory prayer. Thanks for your posting......:)

some think it is all about forgiving what you want to forgive about what you yourself feel you did wrong, and not about what the "opponent" said you did: That is where I feel it is only a half forgivning procedure. think it is only when you can completely see it from the opponents perspective and ask forgiveness, genuinly so, that it is complete.

To me safety, trust, being understood and forgiveness belong together.

I think the way I forgave an ex was to in my head only make him into a friend, that is with less demand on him but what he did wrong to me (during break up) was not working well for him when he wanted me back on some terms? or as before?, not just friends. Karma, I guess? But he was troubled too and trapped too so I would feel sorry for him but I would not let him know I did, he would not want me to feel sorry for him either, but I guess I understood because of his problem (that he and others were still then in denial about) I knew he had a tough time within himself. I think on a spiritual level I always loved him even if me writing that now seem very strange to me as he could irritate me alot after the break up but most of the time I was cool with him. I could not fall back in love again.

He could never say he was sorry and apologize for what happened the evening of the break up and after and to trust my version of it. I know my version sucked and I wish it had never been like that it still was. To me that is what one have to do - one has to buy the other person's version, acknoledge it, say you're sorry. This ex was the only one who puzzled me with this, and we got stuck. I never for a second doubted my experience on the evening of the break up. Perhaps maybe because a part of me was prepared for it as in told in the past that he did not have a drinking problem when I said he did, family, friends, everyone scattered like leaves in the wind, not ready to back me up. But I had my mom in my corner and she too cared about him. She believed me.

Think too that if we don't forgive and think we shield ourselves and only put it out there, throw it at our enemy/enemies we forget that it's very core, the source is existing, growing inside of us, within the walls of the shield, hurting ourselves with the "fire". So yes I would say to forgive someone else is to making yourself a favor. There is a saying I like "See you when you get there", have saved me a lot of frustration when/if someone don't get me, a situation.