Talking about thoughts

[ThatMan]

Last night I had some very interesting experiences.

I found myself talking with my cousin from the near by city, where he was born, now he lives in another country but this is how things appeared to be.

He looked at me, we were face to face at some distance one from another. He said something like this:

In my right hand, to your left side, I have the thoughts of depression, anxiety, hopelessness, lack of self confidence, fear.
In my left hand, to your right side, I have the thoughts of self confidence, bravery, creativity, energy, positivity ( so much more but I can't remember ).

He looked at me and said: Choose one of them.

So I chose his right hand, the one from my left side, I did this because I felt that I am unworthy to pick the other one who had all that good stuff.

Instantly, I felt all those feelings and thoughts eating me alive, I felt down, low, alone, depressed, no self confidence, I felt with 0 energy, so so tired and apathetic. I became and empty shell, there was not even drop of hope in me.

He looked again at me and said: Thoughts come and go, you are the one who chooses to which one to listen to.

It totally made sense what he said, suddenly, I was not anymore my thoughts and my feelings and now I looked to his left hand, from my right side, and I picked that one.

I felt a rush of energy throughout my entire body, I felt as if I just drink the cleanest and fresh water that could ever be. I felt that I was given knowledge of higher things, knowledge of science, I felt the energy surging in my body.

Then he showed me a piece of paper, he said something like: This piece of paper shows how the cold affects my daughter. ( my cousin has a daughter in real life and she really has problems with her heart )

I could see details about every single organ from her body, I saw that her heart was 62% damaged, I saw that her brain was 12% damaged and the rest I can't remember.

Just right before waking up, I felt that I totally became this number: 888; I could see it, feel it, know it, be it. It was as big as the universe. While seeing it I said to myself, this must be the infinite.