Learning to love thy self

[lostsoul13]

I’m stumped: I can’t seem to grasp to love my self than the inner projection of loving someone else; that buzz I feel at the centre of my body or heart reign ( is probably the only sentimental love I feel for the self, maybe I have to love other people to feel it[maybe why I have so many soulmates and a twin flame])

I know in the longing, those feelings are beaches of sentiments of what I feel or fear for the self..

I know I’m : strong, caring, attentive, strong willed ,charismatic and happy go lucky..

I’m not entirely lazy but I lounge a lot~ I swim, karate, walks alone promenade and beach often: eat healthy- I spend my time blogging five blogs ranging from subjects; listen to music, do arts and crafts try my hand at live drawing classes, pottery and upholstering a chair I’m working on.. for my hostel room..

I mean to say I keep fit And healthy..

I’ve met my children (which gives me great joy ) I learnt to love and acceptance and to open my heart.

I met my twin flame[it opened my eyes and freed my mind]

But I can’t stop narcissistic, aloof temperament with the self ; I’ve tried talking nice to the self baby, sweetie ect

I feel a deep empowerment within and stern and strong mind as far as education goes and culture—- I’ve done a lot of things in my time the last 23 years traveled planning to travel again the next three years I’ve even got to teleport.

I understand my future; when, how I am going to die—- I feel calm and at ease but still trying to be one with pain as I discus this pain is discussing me[there’s a small affinity with it and what I can learn ; mastering the art of meditation at least so I’m not complaining about being to comfortable until I’m dead leg or dead feeling- meditation until I’m further than relaxed in a beta state—- hopefully master ZEN one day 6500 reincarnation I worked out in 500,000 years

That’s a life expectancy of 30 more if I’m lucky.

I’m nervous but aspiring to achieve oneness with pain as I feel this is the pinnacle of all that has to offer at the moment in my awareness- and I’m very aware of it and it’s natures and forms it takes: revenge is sweet and I believe even pain has a image—-

I spoofed this conspiracy theory together that pain is ‘spooky action at a distance’ Einstein relativity for entanglement—-

It’s just a entanglement that can’t surpass the boundaries I have already : a noice to be listened too ( it must want to be listening too, it begs enough) it asking us to feel it’s awareness: other than pain in the real body: I feel I’m just reincarnating into bodies the exhibits the sandwich theory and my true body hasn’t manifested yet..

I’m a different image every time I reincarnate :bi choose which avartas from my avarta list and my avarta list has a couple of hundred even thousand of avartas images I can choose from—- some times I look like celebrities- or other mundane people—-(but that’s normal in our symmetry)

There’s groups of people that have similar‘stereotypes’ like blond or brown or black hair..

I’m a double [triple or further infact]photon I embrace black and white and mixed.. and I have avartas for further broad images..

Each avarta teaches me about the culture I never know what country I’ll end up in but I believe we all have a avarta that extends to wider community’s- just we need to unlock it..

I find some people only have one image where some of us have more than one image [I find it’s like shadows the self is so finite in facial features and expressions that light and dark cast shadows allowing me to split up images in to avartas]

I have a real body I call it** that exhibits the facial expressions but it’s so high up it’s stuck with the higher self at the moment I haven’t even began finding out the meanings of the words never mind what else can be expressed than sadness, anger, joy, happy, confusion and contentment… love even..

I am happy with this because those times I reincarnate into the same body I feel cheated and out done[that reincarnation hurts so much the whole process that you get caught up] forgiveness and times the best healer I mentioned a few times to the self…

But all the years I have to the future I find it hard to bond with the self- I have a rather sour relationship with the self.. it’s study and work out and live day to day; week to month ect and it works being alone and not having to answer to no one (is this loving my self, when it works and I feel contentment)

Or

I did a good swimming lesson or karate lesson and I feel like I achieved and learnt new skills or challenges I won and I feel satisfied

[ happy I’m alone again; and feeling a bond that like a pat on the back]

I try to embrace my self I’ve even kiss my hand [ soppy I know] but I missed the point? I’m not perfect to the self in that way I try to convince my self but the thought of being sexual at all is a turn of with the self - it’s like someone else’s in the room…

So I’m celibate.

It seems to work.

I get a gratitude from it that my esteem is higher and I’ll be fulfilled emotionally empathise with the self.. at least I feel empathy for the self with what seems like a mini hell from the turn out of my reincarnations..

I more than pat self on the back.. I give my self a hug…

Affection and emotion displays are much of my thing .. but I feel a real tug when I’m concerning about my reincarnations!!!

I’m wondering how to love the self,

I’ve done art, been rich; been poor the life experience seems to have been enlightening…

I’m not stuck for things to do I volunteer and get out in the community so my feelings of helping and making a difference seem to be content with how much I’m doing.. my kindness and caring about things make me please I am who I Am…

I’m not so hard on the self, but being a guy I could be hard on the self—-
Really the world is my oyster and I’m that pearl[ I could be anything but a pearler definitely at oddity with the self] I mean I could be anything but the whole worlds out there..

I enjoy my lone time and arnt to fussed about making friends; I’ve made life long ones and I know in my life the time will come along where I’ll meet soulmates that are friends.

I feel content with groups I’m going too yoga twice a week and karate and swimming with a friend. I’m not as isolated as I think !

And I know I’ve got lots to look forward to in the future!!!

My main concern is being able to find strength with pain and have gain- where I can build up resistance and durability within the self greater stamina [ the reincarnation have definitely incorporated that in me]


I pamper the self and have massages and relax in the bath although I’m a shower kinda guy - I love that type of intimacy and feel a longing for the self- I want to further those feelings ~ because it feels like coming home like I can reunite with the self —-

Do feel you reunite with the self or will?
What do you do to love your self?

[Justin Passing]

Honestly it sounds to me like your self-esteem (self love) is fine. You're confident, comfortable, active, positive. I don't hear you mentally beating yourself up very often. I think all that points to a fairly healthy self image.

As for the aloofness you feel, I think a lot of us do that. It's fairly typical for cerebral types like us. We live in our heads and watch the turmoil all around us. That's not great, but it is fairly typical, and helps us keep an even keel. What I would suggest would be to immerse yourself in what your body is feeling when you exercise. That should help you to start building a habit of "being you" instead of "watching you" all the time. That doesn't need to be painful by the way. Just the feeling of your body moving and doing things is enough. The point is to focus on the body and stop "living" in your head all the time.

Self love isn't about courtship by the way. You're not entertaining a lover with gifts and praise. Self love is about being comfortable with yourself in a accepting, non-judgmental way. And if you get into pride territory you've gone too far. Humble is the way to be. Humble, earnest, compassionate, accepting, forgiving.

Hope this help, but like I said, from where I sit your self image seems quite healthy to me. Surprisingly healthy given your circumstances.