I just don't want to live, anymore!

[Miss Hepburn]

Originally Posted by iamthat

... you also said in a previous post that you are not happy. What is the value of living unconventionally if you are not happy?

My question to anyone is: Why be unhappy?
What I mean is, your thoughts, (ok... MY thoughts) are what make me unhappy -sooooo..
the resolution is control the stupid, nonsense thoughts...dah.
We have the remote control in our hands!
Practice Thought Control. Change the channel on awful thoughts...
Let's see - a thought -
-Some past regret.
-Some future fear.
-Some awful memory.
-Some wishful thinking then ending it in a negative
-repeating some put down from childhood
-what someone said as they're breaking up with you

The list is endless, I refuse to be party to that insanity.
And have not been since around 2007.
(The first time I heard there was
even something like Thought Control! I had never considered it!)

[ayar415]

Originally Posted by Miss Hepburn

My question to anyone is: Why be unhappy?

Why? When peeing out the dust from the kidney stone is like peeing glass shards, it's a reason to be unhappy. Even the thought of that made you unhappy, did it not? It made me unhappy. And it was the same thought that made Siddharta unhappy when he was awakened to our vulnerability to suffering.

[Miss Hepburn]

Originally Posted by ayar415

Why? When peeing out the dust from the kidney stone is like peeing glass shards, it's a reason to be unhappy.
Even the thought of that made you unhappy, did it not? It made me unhappy. And it was the same thought that
made Siddharta unhappy when he was awakened to our vulnerability to suffering.

Did you just see the 2.5 hr PBS on Buddha, also? I just did.
The pain of stones is a situational distress (unhappiness) having glass-like chards (excellent description) scraping a tiny soft tube!!

But you must know I was speaking of an overall-general unhappiness of
just being here, ayar....that many people have.
I say, ''why'', because there are SO many many ways to lift that unhappiness...
starting with counseling and getting some Life Coping Tools, anti-depressants, Cognitive Behavioral Techniques, thought control and more.
My gosh the resources in the Self-help area alone are enormous now with Lectures on youtube available.

I offered the book The Game of Life and How To Play It - did you, a self proclaimed unhappy person, even check it out
or have any intention to?
(That's none of my business, ayar ---that was rhetorical.)
Some people are professional unhappy, cynical, negative, pessimistic people.
When they have had enough suffering - they will finally do something...and boy will the ripples that go out from
them change for the people near them!

There are methods, techniques, life styles galore one can follow or apply for a few months till they find one that works.
A person does not have to be unhappy.
I am saying this as a person that was not always 'this way' -
clear, happy, confident consistently...ha, ask my friends of decades!
They love being around me NOW!
Because I did something about it.

That's why I say, 'Why'...when a person can do something about it. 2000 years ago people were the same - unhappy - and Jesus came
to change that for us to have an abundant life in all ways, not just financially.
There were techniques - even way back then, that he advised us to do to be happy.
And I can tell you, after counseling Christians --not many ever do them ...not even for 2 days to experiment with them...just to SEE if they work!

[ayar415]

Originally Posted by iamthat

You imply that you are living an unconventional life, but you also said in a previous post that you are not happy. What is the value of living unconventionally if you are not happy?
Peace

Your post was a comment in two parts: 1 - about how you live; and 2 - about how I live. Let's deal with me first.

You’ve got me right, I do live an unconventional life. Unlike you, I don’t have an inner life where I can do my thing divorced from the outside world but at the same time, outwardly, be part of the common herd.

I don’t fit in because I can’t. Therein, lies my lack of convention. Even foxes have holes and birds have their nests. My questioning of convention has rendered me “homeless”. This estrangement is my unhappiness.

I guess, inadvertently, my above reply has dealt with part 1 of your post as well.

[ayar415]

Originally Posted by Miss Hepburn

Did you just see the 2.5 hr PBS on Buddha, also? I just did.
The pain of stones is a situational distress (unhappiness) having glass-like chards (excellent description) scraping a tiny soft tube!!

I didn't see the PBS show on Buddha but I did check out the book "The Game of Life and How To Play It". It's a Christian self-help book on positive thinking. It reminded me of Joel Osteen.

Perhaps, I need to explain the nature of my unhappiness. It has nothing to do with my daily life which is quite good compared to what others are going through. I have no health or financial issues. I live alone and am free of relationship problems.

My unhappiness comes from a lack of connectedness with reality. It's not that I feel like an island separated from other individuals. I socialize quite well, if I want to, and have fun doing that. But unlike other people who are content being who and where they are, I am not.

What do you think?

[Miss Hepburn]

Originally Posted by ayar415

Perhaps, I need to explain the nature of my unhappiness. ..daily life quite good...
-My unhappiness comes from a lack of connectedness with reality.
-But unlike other people who are content being who and where they are, I am not.

What do I think? Good you explained! And luv ur honesty!
1. you are not content with who and what you are
2. Lack of connectedness with reality.

Well, I would take #1 and #2, one by one.
I would ask myself 'how' can this be changed.
Then, do that.

I would ask you (to ask yourself, it's not my biz), Have you ever felt who and what u r.
Have you ever known Reality?

So if you have before -being disconnected would be terrible.
Knowing Reality you would know who you are ..and feel freedom...
along with great contentment.

SO, how does one feel or know who they are or connect with Reality?
And if they (you) have some clue -what keeps you from practicing that, whatever it is.

[ayar415]

Originally Posted by Miss Hepburn

I would ask you (to ask yourself, it's not my biz), Have you ever felt who and what u r.
Have you ever known Reality?

You could be charging five hundred bucks an hour doing this with me. I grew up in New York City and know what it is. Look at Woody Allen.

Have I ever felt who or what I am or known Reality? I was little when I started wondering how come there was a me every time I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror as I was brushing my teeth. I was around 8 when I asked my father what was life about. He said he didn't know and nobody knew. What kind of an answer was that? He wasn't a dud either and was a hot shot merchant banker with Citibank at the time.

Are you sure you want to do this? I don't want to drag you down my rabbit hole. It's a dark place that I have been checking out since. It's not anything like what I see here at Spiritual Forum.

[Aldous]

This is interesting.
Kabbalah Theory of Past Lives
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=71-cu79rQgE

[Native spirit]

I would have to Echo what miss hepburn has said



Namaste

[Native spirit]

But you are not alone in feeling like you do.
I grew up knowing i was different, felt not wanted by my family because i am different.
I Remeber asking why i was with the family i was with because it did'nt feel right, i used to ask why i was in the country i am in because i should be living somewhere else.
i felt alone even though i has siblings,


Namaste