What chance do I have?

[Sarahpro]

I don’t think it’s diet.... ughhh I don’t know what to do cuz it took me like ten months to get out of this the last time. THIS time , it has been five months, but I have been retraumatized several times over in those five months, every day. So time can’t really heal this unfortunately .

[lomax]

Originally Posted by Sarahpro

I don’t think it’s diet.... ughhh I don’t know what to do cuz it took me like ten months to get out of this the last time. THIS time , it has been five months, but I have been retraumatized several times over in those five months, every day. So time can’t really heal this unfortunately .

Propably the root of all this are traumas.The diet can help your immune system to stabilize your energies.Unless you know how to fix traumatic experiences you have to work with what you can do.

I know that your mind rejects things righ now.Even if someone provide you a solution,propably it'll pass unoticed.(It's one of the side effects).And it happens to me as well.

[lomax]

Try this one for some days.

No salt,no oil,no fats,no sugar,no processed foods,(chemicals,preservatives).
And no chemicals to your skin either.

This will raise your vibrations,and it'll help with the detox process.I'm sure you'll feel the difference.

[Unseeking Seeker]

In my view the ‘repair’ of any trauma, essentially arising from misalignment wherein the flow of energy is blocked by temporary negativity should be tackled either by ourselves if we are able or otherwise why not allow a competent ‘healer’ to act as a conduit facilitating the alignment?

Once we get into a mental vortex, unless we can stop all thought with one hand and trustingly allow the a Universe to restore balance within ... (best option) ... if we cannot or find ourselves unable, get a proficient medium to help out.

Surrender is the key. However, our conscious mind (identity doer) does not let go so easily.

Here is a video link on how kundalini trauma may be alleviated https://youtu.be/-7rz2sLkNiU

[MidasCloud]

You can find a societal need and fill it. Sometimes, it's just what you do that matters, not how you feel at any given moment.

[Sarahpro]

I worry I won’t ever be able to surrender.... see even my breathing is being controlled manually now... I don’t have much control over surrender ��

[Unseeking Seeker]

Originally Posted by Sarahpro

I worry I won’t ever be able to surrender.... see even my breathing is being controlled manually now... I don’t have much control over surrender

How do you breathe when asleep? How does the heart beat? Even limited thought can figure this one out easily.

We attach unnecessary self importance to our transient identity. Then we expect identity to let go of itself by effort. Kind of like sitting on a chair, feet not on ground and trying to lift ourself along with the chair up.

If you really insist on being a doer then try this visualisation ... you are formless presence eternal. You choose to occupy your mind body as an instrument for earth life experience. Renew this thought moment to moment to moment in renewal.

The body responds to us, not the other way around. Unless we choose to be in stupor.

Help yourself my dear. Or get help. Do not stagnate in self inflicted contraction.

Apologies for being direct.

***

[Sarahpro]

I don’t know, maybe I temporarily “die” in sleep and when I wake up I breathe consciously. So what even is deAth besides the body’s failure to breathe in air?
Oh I have help, thanks. I just can’t help myself.

[Sarahpro]

So yaaaaa basically I have been obsessing this whole time about having a big heart opening experience- as I had one in 2018. But I failed to remember the TEN MONTHS of healing that preceded it. Now, since I failed to take meds early enough, they are not working, and I am just retraumatized every day. I do not know how gradual healing can occur this way. And thus I don’t know how the big magical moment of love can happen this way either.
I just really stupidly wanted a quick fix back in April and May despite wise people telling me to just be patient. And I’m really worried I did damage in the process. Basically can’t feel anything in my heart anymore, when I look at my eyes they look dead, and my mind is totally split into craving and aversion.

If I may say so, Sarahpro, you seem a victim of the trick forced on society by psychologists and psychiatrists: the medicalisation of daily life. Therapists and the shrinks unfortunately reinforce 'patient's' bad feelings about themselves simply because they're "there to help." By help, they mean to get people away from conditions people have been programmed to think of as undesirable or, put simply, unacceptable.

But we're all just people with our quirks, difficulties, many of which have been pronounced "diseases" when they don't fit with social norms - but they're not diseases at all, just us.

Don't believe for a moment that you killed off your ego. A few writers on the web would love you to believe that's possible with all kind of wonderful "spiritual" benefits. Many couldn't even define what they mean by ego. Do they mean in the Freudian sense? The Jungian? Or the colloquial sense. Whatever it is, it's the "youness" that makes you unique, your sense of "I am". Lose it completely and you're indistinguishable from anything else. At the least you'd be seriously disoriented, unable to make distinctions, to interpret the myriad signs that make up our/your reality and so on.
What probably happened is you believed enough you could dispense with your ego enough that you believed your way into that disorientation.

I have to say that these people who encourage the attempted annihilation of one's ego have a lot to answer for.

Ok, now, it's difficult to get back to how things were - some sort of checkpoint that you could pick up from, but you should try. Take advantage of familiar things, reflect on what they once meant to you. Gradually rebuild.

But...these are just my opinions. I'm probably known here for thinking that psychology is an outright swindle - the medicalisation of ordinary life... Sure, it makes sure the shrinks keep their jobs...but does it help, claiming that someone's oddities are diseases or aberrations?

But for that matter, so is much of latter day spirituality a swindle.
.