Past lover in spirit?

[Shiriya]

Hello all.

I want to get off my chest that I've been experiencing song synchronicities, number confirmations, signs, strong TF symptoms (although I'm skeptic of this albeit receiving few confirmations), and sensing/feeling who I believe is a past lover's (possibly twin flame?) presence or energy on and off for almost 3 years. What triggered this was receiving an intimate past life memory through a dream 5 years ago that changed my life forever. Two years ago he visited me in another dream as if he was revealing himself to my current self. The familiarity of a man I've only seen glimpses of is astounding...as if my gut tells me we've known each other for many lifetimes. Words can't describe the instant connection we both felt the moment we laid eyes on each other in that dream. My current conscious barely knows much about him, yet my soul just deeply KNOWS we share a deep love and recognition for each other. I have a strong feeling that life ended tragically. Sometimes I'm overwhelmed with songs or signs he sends and often cry thinking about him whenever I miss him. Other times I believe I sense his thoughts.

I have gifts mainly in sensing guides/loved ones in spirit and with this particular presence telepathically just knowing what he feels or when he's in my room. Almost every night, he comes and makes himself known by touching my hair, left cheek, neck, shoulders, or surrounding my upper body with warmth as if he's embracing me. Sometimes I feel him at work and have the impression he watches from afar sometimes when I don't realize he's there. For the past few days I've been strongly sensing him and my guides/angels when I was in an emotional rut yearning and missing him (the longing happens all the time) in my room then, I felt warmth engulfing all over my body and a hot, physical touch on my shoulders letting me know he's there. All of a sudden I felt a finger poking slightly to the left of my chest at my heart which startled me. Just to make sure, I asked out loud, "If you are that man from that life, could you poke me again in the same area?" And funny thing is, the very next day this happened AGAIN today at work (along with feeling occasional hot flashes up my spine)!

Would anyone know or could guess or possibly channel (if it's appropriate to request) what all of this means? With the possibility he's not incarnated during this lifetime, why am I feeling all of these sensations? If anyone reading this has been through the same or share similar experiences, please send any advice or reassurance that may provide some insight.. I feel like I'm all alone experiencing these things with no one else to talk to about this.

[Flameseeker]

I would say likely it is your twin flame in spirit however it could also just be their highest self & they could also be incarnate currently just as you often when they show them self in a dream or a vision it means you’re about to meet, it could also be a soulmate in spirit.

Hi, I now and then feel that I am being touched but don't know by who or if it is severals but it is always done with respect and 99% of the time if I am meditating or if someone need me to wake up. I can sense feelings but sometimes don't know if it is coming from me or the outside or what is going on, sometimes I can pin point it coming from the outside, some energy, spirit.
I have too past life memories and have been connected to someone from past life but although I can miss a person from the past life or even this one I have moved on with my romantic life and it does not seem to me that the ones that i am connected to (that I one time was romantically engaged with) is of a romantic interest now, speaking on their behalf - when they connect to me it is not of that nature. think we have most likely had all kinds of different roles in past lives and the romantic one was just one of them (also in both cases, both men, the romantic relationship did not last in that life time).

if this other one is luring you too much with a romantic set then I am afraid it will stand in your way of perhaps meeting and getting involved with someone else alive that you could be destined to be with.

But the soul is so complicated, big...it could also be that this is just a piece of the other significant other soul and the rest is reincarnated and is who you will meet?

in my experience i have realized that someone in my current life is like someone i use to know in a past life,way back, and I received some good and some not so good memories of that person, who they were in that past life. Just today I realized that I often idolize the past life person or even a person in my own life and then something happens - can be just a small thing - that make me remember, oh, yeah - you haven't changed, and yeah, that still annoys me...I think we soulmates can have a sort of love and hate relationship, but apart we can built up this ideal view of one another and it is because the love is pure, I guess, but we are also here to push each other's buttons, or so it seams to me anyhow. I just write this because I think the way yours is carrying on is that he can't loose now can he? but he is still unattainable this way. and you have put him, subconsciously, on a pedestal, and that could prevent you to find the real deal?? You can correct me if I have analyzed this totally wrong, just trying to see it from my own perspective, so I hope I have not offended you.

[Shiriya]

Originally Posted by asearcher

Hi, I now and then feel that I am being touched but don't know by who or if it is severals but it is always done with respect and 99% of the time if I am meditating or if someone need me to wake up. I can sense feelings but sometimes don't know if it is coming from me or the outside or what is going on, sometimes I can pin point it coming from the outside, some energy, spirit.
I have too past life memories and have been connected to someone from past life but although I can miss a person from the past life or even this one I have moved on with my romantic life and it does not seem to me that the ones that i am connected to (that I one time was romantically engaged with) is of a romantic interest now, speaking on their behalf - when they connect to me it is not of that nature. think we have most likely had all kinds of different roles in past lives and the romantic one was just one of them (also in both cases, both men, the romantic relationship did not last in that life time).

if this other one is luring you too much with a romantic set then I am afraid it will stand in your way of perhaps meeting and getting involved with someone else alive that you could be destined to be with.

But the soul is so complicated, big...it could also be that this is just a piece of the other significant other soul and the rest is reincarnated and is who you will meet?

in my experience i have realized that someone in my current life is like someone i use to know in a past life,way back, and I received some good and some not so good memories of that person, who they were in that past life. Just today I realized that I often idolize the past life person or even a person in my own life and then something happens - can be just a small thing - that make me remember, oh, yeah - you haven't changed, and yeah, that still annoys me...I think we soulmates can have a sort of love and hate relationship, but apart we can built up this ideal view of one another and it is because the love is pure, I guess, but we are also here to push each other's buttons, or so it seams to me anyhow. I just write this because I think the way yours is carrying on is that he can't loose now can he? but he is still unattainable this way. and you have put him, subconsciously, on a pedestal, and that could prevent you to find the real deal?? You can correct me if I have analyzed this totally wrong, just trying to see it from my own perspective, so I hope I have not offended you.

Thank you very much for your response, I appreciate you took the time to read all of this. Don't worry, you haven't offended, in fact you've actually put some things in perspective that I've subconsciously been doing with the pedestal thing while experiencing subtle to extreme levels of yearning, heartache, love, or (if this is appropriate) even arousal at times. The reason I probably subconsciously put him on a pedestal is because that intimate PL memory that appeared to me in a dream was so vivid, I felt everything from the kiss we shared along with being stunned from the immense attraction felt. Ever since dating the wrong men around my age bracket in a few failed relationships where I've been treated poorly, it just doesn't compare to this connection I feel while experiencing his love. Sometimes it almost feels like men in this generation could never match up to him, even though it's probably not true. Guess it comes along with being old-fashioned and the heart just knowing what it wants. It's hard shaking off these strong feelings when he's the only man that ever made me feel like a real woman, despite the clear age difference he and my past self had with him being much older and the woman younger.

I also experience the same gentle touches you do as well.They range from respectful or very affectionate, though sometimes when I sense him or my guides/angels they come from behind blending with my energies with strong, warm or hot flashes or tingling. Usually I can tell a loving presence by feeling warm heat and tingling over my head and shoulders. As of late, it surprisingly seems my guides have been understanding of the rollercoaster of emotions and bliss I feel with this connection seeing so many white flashes and orbs at home and work. I haven't been yearning for him as often since my heart and gut for some reason just knows he's watching over in some way or form. I think whenever I feel waves of sadness missing him, it's a form of purging healing through shedding tears before bouncing back to working on myself, working hard on the job, and being there for friends in need.

I feel with this lover's presence in particular whether it's him coming through 5D or in spirit (if he's incarnated) almost every night, my mind's eye receives an image of his face and his body coming up from behind. He gently greets by giving me a warm embrace and looks over my shoulder while sitting in front of the computer. He never speaks or utters a word from what I noticed whenever he visits in spirit, the one dream, or in PL memories making me think he's selectively mute. Makes me wonder if that's why he may send synchronicity through love songs (80's seems to be his favorite in particular). As I type this I sense him behind me, pressure from his hand on my left cheekbone like a droning strong pinch or numbing tingling, and hot tingling on the lips (this is new!). Speaking of--strange thing is as of late, I've been feeling my lips being lightly pulled a few times. I just saw 11:11 while feeling a hot pressure on my upper right arm, though it isn't painful at all, just a strong warmth. It's so strange. Ever since opening my heart and soul to him I've been seeing mirror numbers non-stop.

Originally Posted by Flameseeker

I would say likely it is your twin flame in spirit however it could also just be their highest self & they could also be incarnate currently just as you often when they show them self in a dream or a vision it means you’re about to meet, it could also be a soulmate in spirit.

It's possible it can be. My curious ego and mind just can't help but wonder what it all means from receiving so many signs from spirit about it.

Hi Shiriya, I'm glad you did not take offense. I recognize too what you write about feeling it hot, it can be to me too almost as if I am being burned but I'm not and it can stay for a while. Too the other tingling feeling you described.

From my understanding there is telepathic communication going on the other side so this is why he can seem mute to you.

I must say though because he chose to touch your lips - there is no mistaking that unless you two came from a culture where this was normal among family and friends etc that he views you in a romantic way.

Are you sure it is only one spirit that visit you?

I tend to think that if one can find you so can others.

It sounds as if you are like me - you can't see them unless in dream state or when coming out of it?

It was like I suspected then, he has you heart and because you have had poor experiences in the love department here in this life you yearn for him naturally. But I feel for you because there is naturally frustration too as you describe because you can't be together in this life.

Is there some chance he is trapped in some way, you think? I'm guessing something is up with him because to me he is trespassing when he is kissing you. Make me think he is trapped in his old identity he had towards you in the past life and if it was long ago and he is still that guy and is around you like that maybe he has not moved on?

I have currently one "problem" or how I now should put it: someone I have met I think I knew in a past life and I think he has someone from our past life with him in spirit. Very often if we meet, just talk, something electronic or something else non electronic, but still ghostly like activity is happening. Both of us act as if it is nothing, really. He never seems frighten.

It makes me think he is either, like me, used to ghostly activities and most likely he knows who it is so this is why he is not frighten.

I have had dreams of feeling the energy of this person before and also who ever is making the ghostly activities, breaking through the surface and make me feel things, but right about now I am not sure what it wants with us.

It seems more attached to him, than to me although in that life I loved the person too.

In the past life they both died in the same home, but this was a really long time ago, but I did not die there with them, I died later, so I'm not sure that could make a difference.

Thank you very much for sharing your story :)

[Shiriya]

Originally Posted by asearcher

Hi Shiriya, I'm glad you did not take offense. I recognize too what you write about feeling it hot, it can be to me too almost as if I am being burned but I'm not and it can stay for a while. Too the other tingling feeling you described.

From my understanding there is telepathic communication going on the other side so this is why he can seem mute to you.

I must say though because he chose to touch your lips - there is no mistaking that unless you two came from a culture where this was normal among family and friends etc that he views you in a romantic way.

Are you sure it is only one spirit that visit you?

I tend to think that if one can find you so can others.

It sounds as if you are like me - you can't see them unless in dream state or when coming out of it?

It was like I suspected then, he has you heart and because you have had poor experiences in the love department here in this life you yearn for him naturally. But I feel for you because there is naturally frustration too as you describe because you can't be together in this life.

Is there some chance he is trapped in some way, you think? I'm guessing something is up with him because to me he is trespassing when he is kissing you. Make me think he is trapped in his old identity he had towards you in the past life and if it was long ago and he is still that guy and is around you like that maybe he has not moved on?

I have currently one "problem" or how I now should put it: someone I have met I think I knew in a past life and I think he has someone from our past life with him in spirit. Very often if we meet, just talk, something electronic or something else non electronic, but still ghostly like activity is happening. Both of us act as if it is nothing, really. He never seems frighten.

It makes me think he is either, like me, used to ghostly activities and most likely he knows who it is so this is why he is not frighten.

I have had dreams of feeling the energy of this person before and also who ever is making the ghostly activities, breaking through the surface and make me feel things, but right about now I am not sure what it wants with us.

It seems more attached to him, than to me although in that life I loved the person too.

In the past life they both died in the same home, but this was a really long time ago, but I did not die there with them, I died later, so I'm not sure that could make a difference.

Thank you very much for sharing your story :)

Thank you so much for your response AGAIN! And for relating very much to how touch-starved/yearning I do feel in the present. Reading your words made my nose sting and almost tear up. I feel we both can relate so much to each other's experiences...I swear we're twins with clairsentience and receiving information. It's the same how I've experienced visually and physically interacting with him through dreams! The first and most recent time he ever visited was 2 years ago with guides that took form as older guests visiting my family. We met up by the entrance of my house and the moment he and I laid eyes on each other we both stood absolutely stunned by the instant familiar connection and strong sense of home. Oddly enough our eyes look the same, despite his having a world weary look to them visible crows feet and heavy lids. I was too starstruck and flustered to "properly address him" and to my embarrassment stuttered, "..I-It's you!.." Then one old man scolded me in korean, "Aigoo, you shouldn't address your elders that way." It was mildly humiliating how the man treated me like a little girl in front of the man of my dreams. I believe he was a guide teasing and rubbing in the age difference in my face, lol.

What do you mean or sense by him trespassing? To be quite honest, I do feel something strange is up with him as if some higher power could be in control regulating his visits for a limited time. As I type this I feel constant tingling chills on my upper spine/neck. Just felt tingling on the left side of my bottom lip, my left cheek, and sometimes pressure on my head accompanied by warm flashes all over my body. Geez, he really enjoys making me tense up. lol
Edit: While editing this post in the morning I sensed him touching my chest area for lack of a better words in an intimate way. He does this too sometimes.
Something else is occasionally hearing a very high pitched brief ringing in my left ear, since the last time I requested him to visit me in a dream again out loud. It happened again last night when I just broke down telling him how much I missed and thanked him for showering me with love and nurturing me being touch-starved then felt strong tingling on my left ear from someone. Sometimes he doesn't visit me at night alone and if he appears to come alone there are other presences are there watching over us, or is in my room with him showing themselves and watching while he visits. The other presences don't feel malicious but radiate love and a sense of protection. My mind's eye gets images of beings in white or tennin beings/celestial korean maidens acting as guides or escorting him to the physical perhaps.. However I get the sense somethings or someone monitors over his visits every time which to be honest, frustrates both him and I. I think something's blocking me from regressing further into uncovering memories of that past life we shared together and preventing him being able to visit me in dreams. Since as of late every time I ask him to come in my dreams, I can tell he feels guilty and "stuck" as you channeled. He's holding back things he knows that I don't know from the amnesia that comes with reincarnating in the 3D. I get the feeling he's waited a very long time to show himself and have first contact with me in my first visitation dream. Most likely having waited for centuries perhaps over 600+ years. There's a heavy, somber air about him only he recalls from that life that I don't remember. But I do know we had a child, a son that I think accompanies him sometimes when he visits. From past regressions, I've seen prophecy our child's supposed to incarnate in this life through me though I'm not sure if it's true, but my gut feels it is. Whenever he leaves his heavy heart feels a pang of sorrow not wanting to go, other times he feels a reluctant to leave but knows I'll always be here and he can see me again.

Telepathic communication would make alot of sense. He seems to be a very visual person, prone to sending memories or visual glimpses/images of what he's conveying or the lights in my room/bathroom flickering alerting a presence near. Even though he was mute in that past life that I think may have been in the physical 3D, the strange thing was even without words my past self knew what went on in his mind, especially when looking in his eyes. His eyes shares so much emotion even without words. I think part of it has to do with us being from different cultures in that life he possibly chose not to speak from a language barrier.

You know it's so strange and...oddly fitting you mention "culture". I swear your skills in channeling and sensing is very accurate and powerfully moving! I get the sense based off his attire from that intimate memory he was korean and the woman japanese. PDA/platonic and even romantic gestures were rarely seen or initiated unless in private and if it ever was, it'd be considered a very STRONG taboo display of attraction and affection. In this life, I'm born as a South Korean-American where PDA's still a slight taboo in our native culture. My god, I was VERY stunned and caught off guard he even kissed that strongly feeling like my bottom lip was tingling sore. If it helps, appearance-wise in that PL memory he had long below shoulder-length, black hair half tied up in a tail and the other half let down with a silk headband around his forehead with some kind of clan crest (sadly don't remember what it looks like). As for his attire I can only guess he must've stolen blue samurai armor while on the run with her if he wasn't wearing traditional Goryeo-based clothing. Judging by the woman's appearance, she looked like a young noble with very strong Heian influences with how she kept her long hair down and parted in the middle, along with her pink kimono having floral patterns with layers underneath I think. What stuck out was the fact she had blue or light blue eyes. Since I keep seeing the number 12:44 on the clock, I wonder if those numbers hold some meaning during that year in Japan since the kamakura era is set right after the heian era. In that PL memory the two sat across each other in this japanese-styled room or abandoned shack dimly lit by a paper lamp. His back against the wall while she traditionally sat on folded knees with her hands clasped on her lap. She had to tear her gaze away from him a few times flustered since she couldn't handle how his hungry eyes burned into her. Then the most vivid part of the memory that literally shook me to the core was physically feeling his thumb cupping and turning her face to his crashing his lips against hers and frenched. Her eyes widened and I could feel her holding her breath going limp while his beard tickled around her mouth. Then the memory shifted into short glimpses of her robes partially undone while she basically lost her virginity to him. The magical feeling of his warm, strong fingers on her face and his ravishing kiss woke something within me ever since this memory was shown to me. It's truly changed my life because nothing else can ever compare to the magnetic passion, attraction, and touches he gave her. Sometimes even though things are going great in life, the longing always makes me contemplate suicide just to be with him again.

Sorry for the very long post. Your responses and channeling seriously resonates so much I'm filled with such passion and relief finally meeting someone to get all of this off my chest of questions bottled up over the years.

Is the man you speak to physically incarnated here or in spirit as well? I kind of feel that spirit's trying to get both your attention with flickering the lights to alert it's presence or perhaps send a warning it may feel jealous of you both reconnecting and speaking with each other.

Hi Shiriya!
the pleasure is all mine. I find everything you write very interesting. Thank you for your compliment, I feel the same :)

In one past life memory someone in that life was mute because he had made some kind of vow and because of it we seemed to have learn different kind of communication and somehow the silence was very powerful and someone made us closer. I had to search to finally understand because of his clothes etc what occupation he had had in that life and that could include taking a vow of silence. The culture you describe sound fascinating.

I have experience being some kind of ghost in the after life and when I was only in a conscious mode then I could just watch things and they did not touch me emotionally, but when I came too close to someone I had loved in that life I became my old personality and it got to be heartbreaking for me, especially as I saw my child from that life in tears.

So what I am guessing could be going on with him is that he gets too close to you and so he remembers and because of the nature of your past relationship he then do what he does.

I mean trespassing as he is moving you on the lips, on the chest area, the neck - I have never been touched in those areas. But I guess he understands that you are OK with this, or more than OK, so that makes it OK?

As I remember being a ghost I don't remember touching people and I am not sure if it was because I did not think I could do it or because it would have frighten them. I did try to communicate to my past life ex husband who had sensitive eyes but tough skin (typical businessman) and it was, well, useless, or so it felt at the time. I would be by his bedside as he was asleep with his lady beside him, also sleeping, as I was trying to give him a message in the dream, I guess. We had divorced in that life and had been involved with some kind of pre-modern co-parenting together which worked well for us and the kids, but I fear it was misunderstood by someone, we were friends too, but I was single upon my death and did not want to be in any relationship as I was working on recovering from a very bad relationship.

It is so strange because in this life I was taken back to where we use to live and then the memories kicked in and I sort of lived with flashbacks for a lot of years until accepting that this could be past life related as I did not know anything about past life and did not know what to think about it.

Also what happened after I had found out my memories were true, my past life had really existed and died how I had remembered it, too soon and in a really bizarre way that had brought me childhood nightmare terrors, was that my past life ex husband - still alive - and one of our children began to circulate around me in real life as well as me around them, regarding business as I was a young adult, now working.

I was contacted first by the child, who could very well have been my dad if I would think of his age, and then through someone working for his dad.

I was so nervous that we would end up meeting together in real life, not just over the phone or through the computer correspondence, because I knew with all those memories and me remember how much I had loved them (even if my love for the ex husband had not been the in-love-kind and we would have terrible fights, thus the divorce which he always blamed me for) would make me start to cry, and too I was afraid they would accuse me of being some sick person who had copied my past life self or something. At the time I felt like a freak, there was no Internet like it is today and I thought if I came clean with having past life memories that the next step would be that I would be seen as insane and become a patient at a mental hospital. Already having an older sibling who was insane it was more than real to me that I too could be seen as insane.

I had a dream one time of me visiting the past life ex husband somewhere in the astral existence and simply just knowing he had just died, the expression in his eyes, and he was a stickler, and were he was everything was in order, and it was as if he knew that I was dreaming, and dreaming as my current self. He was busy trying to tell me something but I have no idea what as I can't remember it, as strange as that may sound. Then I woke up with the knowing he had just died. Some time later this was confirmed to me - he had gotten ill and he had died, but before this I did not know.

On rare times I "hear" his voice in my dreams before waking up, but I can never remember his words, I can only on the surface feel him flickering by.
In that life he had several roles to play. One as a kind of big brother (who was dating my sister before jumping over to me, not something I was proud of), then as my husband and ex husband, enemy and then the role of a supporter and friend. He would circulate me with our old friends and family members and he would visit me in the hospital where I would end up after a rough beating or being mentally distraught from the abusive relationship that came after our divorce.

Perhaps he comes through in spirit because our connection is not broken, because I remember too much really too, and because he wish to protect me or something, because this is what he was up to at the late part of my life. There is no romantic setting in the way we communicate, but I would say there is love there. I have felt his hands on my arms and this was a typical gesture he did in life when we were talking, married.

It was too in his culture that even if we were divorced and did not date or so, that he would greet my past life self with his hands on my arms and a quick kiss on my cheek or my hair or forehead. I remember he would say "You're still family".

I guess those who has touched me as spirits has done in a way that would let me know it is them, when I think about it.

My mom who is dead would touch me a particular way and this too has happened. An ex boyfriend would tickle me on my feet to wake me up in the mornings because I was a sleepy head and he needed to get me on time to work, and that too began to happen after his death.

So I guess the way yours are touching you is simply how it was between you and to make you now it is him. so even if that would be trespassing to me, it would be because I'm not single and would not approve of it, as it would feel like trespassing for me, in my situation. But I can totally relate that it is not trespassing for you, in your situation.

The other man I described with the ghostly activity around is - is, and here it goes (spooky really) a child. He has the energy of a child, around him and this use to be our child. Just like what happen to you! I guess the only difference is that we don't share a romantic connection but because of everything else I would say he is someone from my soul group. I feel I have made (finally) a breakthrough with myself; figuring out why I have had such a stormy love life in my past life, why I use to end up with the same or similar type.

The most happy marriage I remember was further back, not my most recent past life, and it was not without problems, but I was so in love and treated so well, our energies just match even if we were different and we were simply alive and good together. He fit me in so many ways. This person I have come to believe has been reincarnated with me, but not in a romantic way, but it does not matter. I have been so thrilled and feel so blessed to know that this spirit is with me in this life and we are just as close and laugh just as much and are as emotionally attached to one another as we were then, and still also in complete peace with one another. We get one another without words. As this spirit has been reincarnated as a child it use to have past life memories of us and would tell me things, would dream things and draw things. There have been things this child has remembered that I don't and when I do the research finding out it was how the child describes during those times, in that exact city we then lived in. The child was able to describe my past life self's looks and other things in details, that astonished me and frighten me at the same time, and the child would do it in a matter-of-a-fact way. It would be as if it suddenly remembered and then suddenly it was over and then the child was just the child again and had no interest to say anything else about it. In those days I thought it was a mistake to remember past life, that none of us should, an error, and so when the child began to talk this way I thought I should not ask or say anything to trigger it more, so because of that I did not influence or push the child either. When we lost each other in that life it was traumatic, but there were other things in that husband's life that were traumatic too and some of it has been brought on in this one, but the child is still a happy kid and I think by now the child has forgotten much of what it has once told me and others and we don't remind either.

There were something you wrote about the orbs that really too catch my attention and that was you wrote it being in the bathroom. Most orbs are in my bathroom as well and I have always thought it was strange it should show up there of all places the most. Could it be because of the water? I have never before lived in a home where there has been so many paranormal activities and when I searched on the land it kept repeating that it was much water hereabouts. That is my only guess, at the moment, if you know why orbs seem to be more in bathrooms, please let me know :)

Hi, sorry - me again, ha ha.

I just thought of adding something you wrote about him feeling grief that he can't give you memories because you now live with amnesia from that life.

I use to recognize something about my own past life memories during regression and this is how it seems to work for me. The people I am allowed to see the faces of is people that I can handle, if we have any shared history of pain together, that these people are safe, I am ready for them. The other people, without faces I am not.

If one does a professional regression then one can be helped through it better if one tries to do it by one self.

Twice it has happen now that I am being visited by someone while dreaming and this someone is then showing me - but it goes too fast and it is too emotional - images, like video play or something, cut off scenes from one and the same past life and I wake up from it and am drain out and can only remember a fragment and only few details from the vision perspective.

From what I have studied they say that things goes faster there on the other side, their way of communication, so who it is that is trying to put on play perhaps is really putting on fast forward for me ;)

On a positive note I then know a lot more (this because for me I have felt that there is information in the feelings), but emotionally it take time for me to get up from that place.

Overall I think he lavish you with love now so you will know how special you are, that you are loved.

My only concern if the spirit of the child that you feel are with him wants you as it's mother then you have to be able to have some distance to his spirit-father and be able to fall in love with a real human being, and that could be difficult if you are in love with him.

You have planted the idea in me that perhaps the spirit-child that is around my co-worker is meant to be reborn again, but then it is most likely to occur to his partner in this life than to me.

[Shiriya]

Originally Posted by asearcher

In one past life memory someone in that life was mute because he had made some kind of vow and because of it we seemed to have learn different kind of communication and somehow the silence was very powerful and someone made us closer. I had to search to finally understand because of his clothes etc what occupation he had had in that life and that could include taking a vow of silence. The culture you describe sound fascinating.

You described it all just so perfectly! Silence is a powerful way of communicating and so sensual if it's in a romantic sense. You learn so much more through your other senses and it certainly does bring people closer. Judging from his attire he certainly worked in the military under one of the few kingdoms in traditional Korea when there were most likely divided warring states. His attire resembles something similar to a royal general. In that intimate PL memory while he was sitting against the wooden walls of the room, he had his sheathed sword resting beside him to his right. Though I sadly don't know much about his history in that life and what may be his reason to take a vow of silence. It sure seems he did knowing he had his tongue intact and doesn't verbally communicate by choice. He's a very good listener and so patient, as I have a feeling my past self must've talked his ears off trying to get to know or understand him better, lol.

This is the closest visual representation I could find of how he looks like:

Originally Posted by asearcher

So what I am guessing could be going on with him is that he gets too close to you and so he remembers and because of the nature of your past relationship he then do what he does.

I mean trespassing as he is moving you on the lips, on the chest area, the neck - I have never been touched in those areas. But I guess he understands that you are OK with this, or more than OK, so that makes it OK?

So I guess the way yours are touching you is simply how it was between you and to make you now it is him. so even if that would be trespassing to me, it would be because I'm not single and would not approve of it, as it would feel like trespassing for me, in my situation. But I can totally relate that it is not trespassing for you, in your situation.

Yes you're right. It does catch me off-guard all the time but in a pleasant way feeling the warmth of his presence and love knowing it's him. Actually there's an incident that happened this morning which I wasn't totally expecting. Waking up around 5:51 AM I checked my phone a few minutes after getting an urge from my guides and saw the time was 5:55. A bit later while browsing on the phone saw 5555 in mere seconds and tried to fall asleep as I felt extremely tired waking up at dawn. After letting a video regarding twin flames play on youtube from my phone and dozed off, I noticed the more I let myself open up to him since I sensed he laid beside me I could feel his touches growing more sexual in nature and gradually fell into REM sleep. I felt I sensed his energy on my bed yet I couldn't turn my head from the side of my pillow to see him (must've been because during REM your body's
naturally paralyzed) and I felt overall safe but a little nervous not being able to move. I sensed tingling going down my thighs and legs that calmed them from jerking me awake, or perhaps I felt so relaxed and felt these sensations while tense being paralyzed. To put it briefly l received a sexual visitation involving some tantric influences I believe. The experience felt very loving, passionate, and safe yet the strange thing was I felt another male/androgynous presence in my room watching as if it was warning him "times up". I grew scared and tried to speak but could only utter a nervous sound while he did what he did and as a way of reassuring me I felt a very strong tingling pressure on my right cheek, assuming he was giving a strong kiss.
Now that I'm writing all of this out it makes me worried wondering if that was really him or some other being trying to feed off my yearning for him. If only I could tell if it's really him that did come to me and I'm not crazy being fooled by something else...though it seemed like it was him based off how familiar his imprint felt. Though after I woke up sensing him I cried talking out loud letting him know how thankful I am how he always shares his love for me and is always respectful and so nurturing with his affection. While doing so I noticed a peach-colored orb and another orb in..I think a light teal color hovering by.
While speaking what's on my mind to him about our relationship or whenever I occasionally sense him, I always feel a slight or obvious burning sensation on the left side of my neck/shoulder area and cobwebs on my face or left cheek. After this sexual encounter I've been feeling light-headed most of the day, assuming because it takes alot out of you and someone on the other side to make a visitation work, let alone in intimate ways.

Though I feel a bit suspicious and worried about it, my guides and angels seem to send me numbers that I'm "on the right path" about it. Still feel unsure but it could be me overthinking and worrying I'm going crazy when most of their answers were there in plain sight.

Originally Posted by asearcher

I was so nervous that we would end up meeting together in real life, not just over the phone or through the computer correspondence, because I knew with all those memories and me remember how much I had loved them (even if my love for the ex husband had not been the in-love-kind and we would have terrible fights, thus the divorce which he always blamed me for) would make me start to cry, and too I was afraid they would accuse me of being some sick person who had copied my past life self or something. At the time I felt like a freak, there was no Internet like it is today and I thought if I came clean with having past life memories that the next step would be that I would be seen as insane and become a patient at a mental hospital. Already having an older sibling who was insane it was more than real to me that I too could be seen as insane.

On rare times I "hear" his voice in my dreams before waking up, but I can never remember his words, I can only on the surface feel him flickering by.
In that life he had several roles to play. One as a kind of big brother (who was dating my sister before jumping over to me, not something I was proud of), then as my husband and ex husband, enemy and then the role of a supporter and friend. He would circulate me with our old friends and family members and he would visit me in the hospital where I would end up after a rough beating or being mentally distraught from the abusive relationship that came after our divorce.

Goodness can you and I relate so much. Even with the internet available to give some pointers about these kinds of experiences, there's still scant information about what we both experience with spirits that visit since as you said, they communicate very differently and time goes faster on the other side of the veil. I also share similar experiences with guides or glimpses of that lover visiting but forgetting about what they say or did.

I believe your PL ex husband may guide and watch over you since despite all the fights and even if there wasn't much love in the romantic sense, he feels sorry and still cares for you being one of the very few people that was by his side that dealt with his flaws and imperfections. I feel I get the sense he thinks he should've been a better husband despite his reserved nature in that life and then feels he could help you in ways he didn't or wasn't able to in the physical now in spirit.

Originally Posted by asearcher

There were something you wrote about the orbs that really too catch my attention and that was you wrote it being in the bathroom. Most orbs are in my bathroom as well and I have always thought it was strange it should show up there of all places the most. Could it be because of the water? I have never before lived in a home where there has been so many paranormal activities and when I searched on the land it kept repeating that it was much water hereabouts. That is my only guess, at the moment, if you know why orbs seem to be more in bathrooms, please let me know :)

I apologize to say that I'm not too sure. My guess is as good as yours it could be the water, or perhaps bathrooms seem to have a very "clean" or refreshing energy since showers/running water is a form of cleansing negative energies on your physical and mental bodies.

[Shiriya]

Originally Posted by asearcher

Hi, sorry - me again, ha ha.

I just thought of adding something you wrote about him feeling grief that he can't give you memories because you now live with amnesia from that life.

I use to recognize something about my own past life memories during regression and this is how it seems to work for me. The people I am allowed to see the faces of is people that I can handle, if we have any shared history of pain together, that these people are safe, I am ready for them. The other people, without faces I am not.

Haha, no worries! I love hearing what you have to say and the pleasure's mine as well.
That's exactly how it went with his face being "blurred out" in that memory and then finally once he showed himself with my guides in the visitation dream I saw him, entire face-and-all standing in front of me "in the flesh." It seems like a common occurrence during regressions what we hear or see being blurred/muffled out if we aren't ready for certain information. Perhaps it happened since I was too young to understand or intuitively grasp the nature of my relationship with him until he came to me.

Originally Posted by asearcher

Overall I think he lavish you with love now so you will know how special you are, that you are loved.

My only concern if the spirit of the child that you feel are with him wants you as it's mother then you have to be able to have some distance to his spirit-father and be able to fall in love with a real human being, and that could be difficult if you are in love with him.

You have planted the idea in me that perhaps the spirit-child that is around my co-worker is meant to be reborn again, but then it is most likely to occur to his partner in this life than to me.

Aww, thank you so much. I get the impression that's what he's been doing with his affections as well as trying to hint at it with the songs he'd send my way. I noticed a pattern with most of the lyrics to love songs involving him communicating that he's sorry, feeling guilty about something he's done in the past hurting me and beating himself up for it believing he was a fool. Most have to do with missing me on the other side and doing his best dealing with the pain of separation feeling I was the one that "got away" or shouldn't have went alone, asking for forgiveness. Others about how much he never expected to be greatly given a nurturing love hinting about that intimate memory or waiting a long time for me til I pass in this life. One that stuck out in particular was "Save All Your Love" by Great White, "Is this Love" by Whitesnake, and lyrics to "Wait for You" by Bonham here:

Come tomorrow, one day closer to your heart
Lost around me, is time in itself when you're near
Take the time, I'll show you the lover for you
You're too young, to know what it is that I feel

All that I can do is wait for you just wait for you
All that I can do is wait for you just wait for you

Full of sorrow, your eyes are too wide and too new
Though I know these feelings I get when you're near
Even I, I can't give you love without fear
You're too young, I don't know what's keeping me here

All that I can do is wait for you just wait for you
All that I can do is wait for you just wait for you

Receiving all these signs are very hard to decode and cryptic with the amnesia that makes these experiences all the more confusing without a skilled medium/channeler, but think the above is pretty much one of the main messages he's been trying to send. Him visiting with the child happened several times during the year whenever I'm at work, though rarely happens. I've had one dream where I must've visited the child in spirit while he slept in his room as that past self who must've been his birth mother, reacting as if she hasn't seen him in such a long time and touching his face to see if her eyes deceive her he's real. I heard someone sliding one of the shoji doors open and peer in thinking they must've heard me and beginning to panick, I woke up.

It's like you can read my mind. I miss his father dearly and do I so badly want to be with him. Having some bad relationships in the past in this life the times I've opened up to other guys, he's the only one that treats me with respect, knows how to reassure me, and always showers me with nurturing love from above. Not to mention very physically and spiritually attractive on all levels--practically the absolute man of my dreams. Something about men during those times carrying such discipline and how they physically looked rugged with long hair and facial hair always seemed attractive to me, perhaps due to having several lives in the east or based from the east in higher realms.

There's a sense of bitter-sweetness taking in the reality of being incarnated here knowing this as I never really found any man that's attractive in the slightest or makes me feel the way he does moving my soul...no words can describe how blissful he is. It could be my pessimism speaking not meeting the right man from my past earthly relationships in this life, but as a mature or old soul, guys in this generation/present era just don't do it for me with how alot of them tend to be absorbed in certain ideals women should be as well as the overflow of technology and instant gratification younger men get from pornographic material distorting their views of women. Thats one of the reasons why I tend to find older men attractive that are genuine atleast. I admit I don't go out much aside from work and how it could be the case with divine timing not meeting whoever may be destined being the spirit baby's father, yet just find this hard to swallow when missing the warrior lover and desiring to have a real family with him. Deep down I understand I'm supposed to learn being flexible and adapt to the new in this life with a tendency being very selective with the kinds of people I let in to get to know me, but can't help yearn for the past that had more real, authentic connections filled with such integrity and loyalty with love.