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01-01-2017, 05:04 AM
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Suspended
Join Date: Apr 2016
Posts: 63
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Quote:
Originally Posted by naturesflow
I am glad it offered you an opportunity to open and share some more. I applaud your honesty, this really is the key to the subtle nature of owning/withholding those aspects of ourselves we do not like. Your very aware and doing your best, that in itself is a really great place of awareness.
I noticed through this stage of my own process, I had some key people in my world who triggered me. Sometimes I think we find what we need without trying. Sadly in reflection it is so easy to look back and see what losses come from that, but in reconciling in us there are always lots of opportunities to make amends, continue to be open with people and offer where we are and what we are managing.
I am a fairly open person and I understand myself through process. Anger and rage is really something the world struggles to own for others in it too, which is sad, because often for children it is such a suppressed and not accepted emotion that many parents do not know how to manage. I was one, but I learned to stay present with it and learn new ways to manage myself in it.
The avoidance is part of your own connection building, so those you avoid, if you do the work, can actually become the space in you that can change in feeling in this regard.
It is great you have found a way to channel your competitiveness. That is a good thing to be doing.
Feeling the fallout of our reactive space towards others, can be just as painful as it is to be dealing with anger and rage. In fact for me feeling the hurt of others from me was always one space I judged myself in. Compassion and forgiveness are such a beautiful aspect to find through these issues. Once you find them and bring them to those places in you, the past and issues you once had, do settle in you in peace. You do "feel" able to build through that reconciliation and peace within to make life work in ways where you do not have to be avoiding and feel you are out of control all the time.
Fear taught me about control. Anger taught me about how I felt in losing control. My triggers for that were pivotal to the reflection deeper in me gradually over time, layer by layer. SO even as you "lose it" you do reach a point in yourself where the foundation of it, begins to crack deeper and really fall away.
All the best.
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This really spoke to me, and I relate to all of it. I don't have much more to say now though, I got what I came for.
Thanks
And thanks for everyone who replied.
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01-01-2017, 05:48 AM
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Master
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: In my cocoon.
Posts: 6,653
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WuWei
This really spoke to me, and I relate to all of it. I don't have much more to say now though, I got what I came for.
Thanks
And thanks for everyone who replied.
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Take care of yourself.
__________________
“God’s one and only voice are Silence.” ~ Herman Melville
Man has learned how to challenge both Nature and art to become the incitements to vice! His very cups he has delighted to engrave with libidinous subjects, and he takes pleasure in drinking from vessels of obscene form! Pliny the Elder
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05-01-2017, 10:09 PM
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Master
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Olympia, Washington
Posts: 1,933
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Sounds like you are experiencing a lot of irritability.
If a person becomes attached to the peace and silence brought about by meditation they can become angry or irritable when someone interferes.
__________________
I log once every couple of months, sometimes a couple times a week.
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