What brings you to spirituality?

I always wanted to share this, one aspect of myself. I am mostly straying and most of you know here on this forum. I wrote too much on sexual topics and that defaced my real self. I have to speak confessedly sinned in life by many standards and indulged in various activities and remain fallen in the eyes of the sacred.

Yet I have another self. The true self of myself and I was, incredibly, unlike the rest of other kids never stopped wondering at the miracles of God, nature, or something I cannot word and phrase it. The mystery of this universe. I was always skeptical and am still whenever I argue. Mostly when I argue I side with atheistic standpoints. I have read quantum physics and all the books including the Grand Design by Stephen Hawking. Quantum mechanics appealed to me greatly and I agree on so many subjects and theoretical propositions with him and with the rest of other physicists. Yet I never can live without questioning. I do not believe nature is chaotic. There are laws, systems, programs or consciousness in nature or something rules nature. All these questions brought me to spirituality. Not that I am a strong believer in God yet spirituality is a domain that can answer most of my questions and it is the realm I find myself with similar minded people.