Relationships and empaths

So I very recently discovered I'm an empath. I knew I've been suffering from anxiety, panic attacks, the works most my life, but I just came to the discovery after breaking up with someone.

Pretty much all of my relationships in the past followed the same pattern, fall deep and fast for each other and after a short period of time I'd get overwhelmed and frustrated that I couldn't deal with it anymore and walk away. There were even times that I couldn't date someone because I'd feel so overwhelmed to begin with before anything started.

Now I understand to a big extent what being an empath means and entails, but still not 100%. The way I see it, is having a huge inward flow of receptivity, you can't put a filter on. and everyones energy get's to you, affects you, becomes you. As an exampleI, Sometimes even passing by a stranger on the street could cause my heart to skip a beat and get my emotions all whirled up. When I first meet someone and decide to date them because there's something I like in them, it feels great. And I spend more time with them until, what now I understand actually is, being intertwined with their thoughts, feelings, emotions, ideas and frustrations on top of my very own. Before realizing I'm an empath I had no idea what that emotion/feelings conglomerate was. It sure was very painful tho.

I tried to treat the symptoms of anxiety in the past with CBT... the work I'd have to do always seemed gargantuan to me. Anxiety medication does help but I feel it's interesting as it masks my symptoms of being an empath and it allows me to function but something is slightly off about it. Even in my last relationship I was open about being an anxiety sufferer for the first time. That was very helpful at first, however the fact the other person was a fellow empath, caused a lot of turbulence. Neither one knew, so that drove to it's demise.

Now that I know the cause, I'm open to finding ways to coping. However at this point, I don't believe having a romantic relationship for an empath is possible. Any fellow empaths could share their experiences, opinions would be very welcome

[FallingLeaves]

I always wondered why I couldn't date... now I know

[Captain]

If you can, don't move in together, don't always fall asleep in the same bed, get up at midnight and go sleep on the sofa if need be. Awareness is key, now you know you are an empath you can adjust your lifestyle accordingly.

Only date very loving kind people, that makes a huge difference, so if things don't work out you can both take out the time to de-tangle your feelings and emotions gently. Remember it take time to tangle and it takes time to de-tangle.

Most important is keeping your own home or space for at least a few years, after that you should be able to set your own parameters. You need space, don't be together all the time. You need lots of time to integrate and retain what is yours.

When I sleep with a new partner in the same bed I will often dream and process his stuff. Too confusing. It takes years before I can do that. Good luck!

[Heaven]

Hi!! I'm an empath too and I'm marry so don't lose hope, you can still be in a relationship, its not easy thou! sometimes I feel like running away and never coming back. But I have to be able to learn how to deal with it. I wrote a thread on my husband's draining my energy and how to heal myself from it (in the Healing section) I recommend you to read it cause some ladies came me good insight on empath and relationship. One good thing of being an empath is knowing ahead if a person is a friend or a foe. The anxiety you been getting can be from a friend, a family member or a neighbor, you have to be able to tell the difference when you are getting that anxiety and ask yourself "its is me or someone's else". To me it was a huge advantage to know that I'm an empath cause I now know why I am the way I am, it has been much easier for me to understand myself. A lot of fellow empaths are in anxiety meds and probably have no idea that its not their anxiety that its a gift that they have to be able to read someone else's energy, but you have to learn how to block it and clean yourself and not take it in as your anxiety, so that you won't feel drained and overwhelm. Please don't lose hope you still can have a normal relationship with someone you just have to be able to clean yourself from that energy and be able to block it too. :) Take salt or lavender baths that cleans your energy and make you feel like new, go to the park for nature walk, or meditate. My favorite place to clear my energy is going to the beach but I cant do it too often is not that close to me.

[OnAPath]

I totally agree. The beach feels like a washing machine to me. The wooshing water and the gritty sand works wonders.

My husband is not nearly as spiritual as I am. I can not tell if he is an empath, because he goes not communicate his anger. He loves to talk about anything controversial, which I find odd.

Anyways, I have noticed that my development let me to the "not mine" training. When an emotion hits, I make a decision if it's mine, or not mine. If it's not mine, it just washes over me, but does not become part of me. It's like I'm aware there is sadness around me, but I do not start crying. I also cleans in that way. If anything from the day sticks to me, I wash it away with the "not mine" mantra, and a lot of junk comes. What's left is all mine, and I deal with that accordingly. The decisions come automatically now. I don't stop and think about every emotion that passes by.

I have, however, noticed that when I get emotional, then those things don't work, and if I am in an argument, I will pick up the other person and react with twice the emotion a normal person would.

I hope this helps!

Thanks for your kind messages guys. I feel reaching out here and realizing I'm an empath was a great first step. I think I took it too hard with that last relationship. But I had to see it for what it was, a sign to make me come closer with my true self. Understand who I truly am. It was painful at the time. But after a lot of meditation and guidance from my angels and doing a lot of writing and reading, I can see clear now!

I now believe being an empath is a HUGE blessing and that's the only thing that's true about it. We all have been given this gift to help the world understand love and compassion. We're special and mandatory to the function of this world. I'm an artist, all artists are empaths that's why we're so sensitive. You need to explore your creativity and embrace it. Until now I had the hardest time accepting my Gift. I was scared. Whenever in doubt, I have to remind myself it's my birthright and I deserve it! It's the tool to assist us with our soul purpose, to bring connectedness to each other. I realized accepting my sensitivity functions as a compass. You can shut down your creative energy with your sensitivity altogether, in order to protect yourself. But that's not the point. Living a life like that is sad and unfulfilling.

As far as relationships go, I do believe boundaries are necessary. In respecting and embracing who you are, you should also do the same with the people who you let enter in your life. I feel when you connect with your true self through your sensitive nature, the right people enter your life to help you in your soul purpose. That's when a true companion enters freely and easily.

I hope these words help,
Angel blessings of love and abundance!

Having EMP can be difficult, especially if you want to pursue a relationship etc...

Most people find another partner so I don't doubt you will too, and even if you don't there are more things to life than love and finding a partner if you can break your biological disposition.

[Captain]

Originally Posted by jckprtr

Thanks for your kind messages guys. I feel reaching out here and realizing I'm an empath was a great first step. I think I took it too hard with that last relationship. But I had to see it for what it was, a sign to make me come closer with my true self. Understand who I truly am. It was painful at the time. But after a lot of meditation and guidance from my angels and doing a lot of writing and reading, I can see clear now!

I now believe being an empath is a HUGE blessing and that's the only thing that's true about it. We all have been given this gift to help the world understand love and compassion. We're special and mandatory to the function of this world. I'm an artist, all artists are empaths that's why we're so sensitive. You need to explore your creativity and embrace it. Until now I had the hardest time accepting my Gift. I was scared. Whenever in doubt, I have to remind myself it's my birthright and I deserve it! It's the tool to assist us with our soul purpose, to bring connectedness to each other. I realized accepting my sensitivity functions as a compass. You can shut down your creative energy with your sensitivity altogether, in order to protect yourself. But that's not the point. Living a life like that is sad and unfulfilling.

As far as relationships go, I do believe boundaries are necessary. In respecting and embracing who you are, you should also do the same with the people who you let enter in your life. I feel when you connect with your true self through your sensitive nature, the right people enter your life to help you in your soul purpose. That's when a true companion enters freely and easily.

I hope these words help,
Angel blessings of love and abundance!

You got it!

[sarek]

What might help, not only with relationships, but with all of life, is to try out mindfulness. That may give you a better idea where thoughts and feelings are coming from and might be helpful allowing you to separate you from the other.

I can resonate so much with this post. Although admittedly, I don't experience the feelings that you describe to quite the same extent, I can relate to the relationship side of things - the sense of being so overwhelmed with strong feelings that I have to either walk away or I end up destroying the relationship completely. I've also been told by some clairvoyants that I possess some psychic and intuitive skills myself - so it's great to know that this isn't rare amongst this community.