Spiritual crush

As children, sometimes we can grow up with crushes on others. Our first love, loves first glance our way. An intensity that hits us in ways we have never felt before. It can be a swirling giddy ride of emotional connection in that moment of recognition. I was thinking back on those early crushes I had growing up. I had one particular crush on a teacher, who made my heart race, made me feel all kinds of emotional highs and lows, and who I honestly kept tucked in my private space for a long period of my early life as my biggest crush. As I was a very fearful child during those times, much of my fear space was triggered in the face of that crush.

As I got older the nature of that type of crush ended when with real love experiences came into my awareness. I began dating, meeting men engaging in various connections. Most of those connections ended up teaching me much about myself, much about relationships. Those reflections as crucial as my early ones.


I was thinking further on, later on in life when I was awakening deeper in myself, when I came face to face with this crush again. Only this time, it was much more intense, much more connected, it sent me on that same roller coaster ride as my first physical crush did in my early years. I call this one my spiritual crush..This spiritual crush opened up things in myself long held in, it triggered me a thousand times over in many places in me of pain, love and joy and every emotion related through the whole unfolding.


I created all kinds of ideas about this kind of spiritual crush. I named it many things before I arrived at the realization it was in fact my spiritual crush, the crushing blow of spirits call back to self. The intensity of recognition at a level we cannot often see in self, the silent call of love in reflection of spirit in another.

As I *used* this person as my spiritual crush, I realized that in many ways I was using their whole being to open to my own whole self. I used their reflection of spirit and self to bring myself home into me. I was seeing my own source in them and their presence allowed for me to soar deeply into my own self.

Today as I reflect on spiritual crushes/twin flames/soul connections, I realize that when we are drawn so closely to another, it can feel like we have found someone who feels as close to source as we will ever get, they can feel like home to us. It can be a sub conscious/conscious knowing/unknowing awakening in self, a stirring of our core connection as I learned. But even in spiritual recognition, reality hits home on every level of this kind of connection. So we learn to deepen in the face of the whole self one with the pull or force of spirits call in the other..:)

And of course on from there, I have come to realize my own source through the many faces of those crushes, early reflections, I realize my own spirit, my own love and my own connection.

But for each one I am grateful for their presence of being to know and feel this today..

[Finallyhomewithin]

Originally Posted by silent whisper

As I *used* this person as my spiritual crush, I realized that in many ways I was using their whole being to open to my own whole self. I used their reflection of spirit and self to bring myself home into me. I was seeing my own source in them and their presence allowed for me to soar deeply into my own self.

Today as I reflect on spiritual crushes/twin flames/soul connections, I realize that when we are drawn so closely to another, it can feel like we have found someone who feels as close to source as we will ever get, they can feel like home to us. It can be a sub conscious/conscious knowing/unknowing awakening in self, a stirring of our core connection as I learned. But even in spiritual recognition, reality hits home on every level of this kind of connection. So we learn to deepen in the face of the whole self one with the pull or force of spirits call in the other..:)

And of course on from there, I have come to realize my own source through the many faces of those crushes, early reflections, I realize my own spirit, my own love and my own connection.

But for each one I am grateful for their presence of being to know and feel this today..

This was very well said. I think you hit home for me personally with this post and particular statement below. Thank you. :) I find it difficult to the words to express my thoughts quite often. lol! This was perfect.

" I used their reflection of spirit and self to bring myself home into me. I was seeing my own source in them and their presence allowed for me to soar deeply into my own self."

Originally Posted by Finallyhomewithin

This was very well said. I think you hit home for me personally with this post and particular statement below. Thank you. :) I find it difficult to the words to express my thoughts quite often. lol! This was perfect.

" I used their reflection of spirit and self to bring myself home into me. I was seeing my own source in them and their presence allowed for me to soar deeply into my own self."

Thankyou I am glad you found a home hit in my sharing.
Articulation of feeling and knowing can be difficult, but experience is a good teacher to bring it home in many ways..

[Clover]

Beautifully written, Silent. Nice read.

[Ciona]

I thought this was beautiful :)