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25-05-2024, 05:20 PM
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Master
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 2,570
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![blackraven's Avatar](image.php?u=2061&dateline=1286755552) |
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ReturningMoon - I have seen friends come and go, mostly go, in my life. But the one constant, as dysfunctional, frustrating and stressful as they are, is my family. My best friend outside of my spouse is my little sister. I'm grateful to have someone that comes from the same family to talk to because she understands all the people in this odd group of folks.
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28-05-2024, 02:48 PM
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Master
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 1,872
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I feel something somewhat similar. One of the few constants in my life has been my family. I think that if worst came to worst, then I could depend upon them for a few things, at least, if I was in dire straits or completely alone. So despite the fact that I can't be myself with them, and I don't relate to them, in many ways, I try to do what I can not to step on their toes too much and to maintain that connection.
I even harbor the hope of one day rekindling some kind of warmer, more human connection with them. Especially with the one or two who used to seem different, more relatable. Maybe they'd become more like their old self who used to understand me better. Or maybe I could discover whole new ways, to relate to them, and then others. Family would probably be less quick to completely ignore me because I'm unusual. My gestures of attempted kindness might be less likely to be brushed off.
They'd never completely reject and abandon me, unlike "the world". I could've burnt my bridges, but now I wouldn't anymore. How much this forced kindness and passive-aggressive connection is worth is questionable. But, for me, I have an impossible time making any lasting friends at all, and I really need some kind of social interaction beyond what I find elsewhere. I keep in touch, because they're my last resort, or, maybe even a untapped source of kindness and love, in some as-yet undiscovered way.
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28-05-2024, 06:11 PM
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Master
Join Date: May 2016
Location: U.S. Southwest
Posts: 2,867
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I was a social worker in New York and in Denver, Colorado, working in child protection, so I saw the seedy side of dysfunctional families, which may have skewed my perspective on families. I saw more unhealthy families than I did healthy families, but my job as a licensed social worker was not about working with healthy families.
I had kids in my custody who had been sexually abused, emotionally abused, and physically abused, some were going through all of those while others were abandoned and living on the streets. I worked with kids as young as five years old. The one thing I found was that most of these kids still loved their parents even though they were abused by their parents.
Today, we have our family of origin, but we also have extended families, step-families, blended-families, adopted family, etc. Some kids live with their grandparents or an uncle and aunt instead of their birth parents. In my opinion family is a feeling, a connection which we have with people. A person grows up and creates their own family, which usually involves marriage and them having children.
The family unit is the basic unit of any society; the African saying “it takes a village to raise a child” involved more than just a tight family unit. As a former social worker we had two umbrella concepts for raising children who were in our care, one was to nurture that child and the other was to set limits. We had a saying, “children do not have to behave to be loved but they must be loved in order for them to behave.”
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29-05-2024, 12:49 AM
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Master
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 2,635
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![lostsoul13's Avatar](image.php?u=24279&dateline=1668359391) |
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I met the majority of my family when I first manifested, including my tf-
Without meeting them I wouldn’t have no hope, no structure, no purpose, no guidance for the future:
Living to die and reincarnate is a great tribulation—- you need more than sense to get you through… I always said life is perfect because I was given my wish[ even my sense of identity it’s given me had given me great confidence and self control ]
Although I always have my earth family and they have given me structure also an inclining to the depth of fate that’s at play…
I wouldn’t be without both!
What’s the hardest thing leaving me wanting more is the personal power of the self~ healing, teleportation, traversing… things that live in dreams.. I know it’s possible as with magic but I’ve learned most things we desire aren’t magic but evolution!
I’m mad at the self because I know there are people out there that have evolved and are living their best lives maybe through reincarnation or just they were turned on at birth.
I know I’ve got a long road ahead of me.. sigh
__________________
Vampire speed..
Arabic first language (English)—- bear with me and please be patient)
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02-06-2024, 02:22 PM
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Master
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 7,151
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![FairyCrystal's Avatar](image.php?u=31081&dateline=1605871709) |
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Of course family isn't enough. Our lives would be eerily limited and almost confining if family was all we had.
When very young family (parents or the ones fulfilling that role) should provide the basic needs a baby and young child requires to survive and preferably thrive.
Even in the time of the hunter - gatherers people had more than blood relatives in their lives to rely on and live together with.
Aside from that, immediate family (parents and siblings) often don't meet the needs at all. Not talking food & shelter & clothes etc. In my country that is quite normal for everyone to receive.
But when it comes to psychological, emotional, social etc needs the family we're born into very often doesn't meet the needs of the baby/child at all.
There are all kinds of reasons why this is the way it is, but also from a spiritual perspective there's a reason: we choose a family to incarnate in that can offer us the setting for the lessons we wish to learn.
We make agreements with the other Souls of the family before we incarnate.
Many of my emotional & psychological needs weren't met when I was a child and it remained that way until I left home.
That's not to say my parents were bad or bad parents, not at all.
But even when parents/caretakers love their child they can "fail" to meet its needs.
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Yesterday, 05:38 PM
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Newbie ;)
Join Date: May 2024
Posts: 8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ReturningMoon
Hi everyone. I think that as children our needs could be met by family alone. It isn't until adulthood that we realize the needs our family didn't meet. At this point we realize we need more in our life than just family. At least that's my experience. At one time all my family met my needs; now only some I remained close with.
So do you think just family really is enough or do we need more than just that?
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Without me, my parents would just sit alone, I think
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