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Thank you for your replies. ❤️
The dilemma for me is that I do not want to spend my afterlife with him as a part of the lodge I would have to share with him, as we are family. I do not wish him ill but I do wish to remain separate from him.
One of the Lakota elders, as to say a more gifted and learned Shaman than I, is attempting to heal me from what he says are wounds and scars to my astral body, and intervene in some way.
There may be some intermediate realm where my father can reside until he works off his own karma, without me gifting him the karmic merit that another may need in order to reach the hunting grounds. There are those on earth and of my relatives that may badly need this gift that I have spent many lifetimes accruing.
I can forgive him, and I offered him this before the hour of his death as it is no strong feeling for me either way. I am not ok with bestowing such a thing (karmic merit) on someone who did not seek a means to better themselves or humanity in life... but instead seeks to force my hand as they are left with no alternative after death.
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❤️
A free bird leaps
on the back of the wind
and floats downstream
till the current ends
and dips his wing
in the orange sun rays
and dares to claim the sky.
The caged bird sings
with a fearful trill
of things unknown
but longed for still
and his tune is heard
on the distant hill
for the caged bird
sings of freedom.
~Maya Angelou
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