Hi Deuce26,

Apart from sleep paralysis and seeing ghosts,you sound very much like me.

IF you haven't already done so,look up traits of Aspergers.

It may help?Though i see it as just another human label.

Apart from that,all i suggest is keep on beating life to the tune of your own drum.

And get out of your comfort zone and be open to new experiences.

As to being 35 and unsure where life is going,at the age of 35,i turned my life around 360.

All i suggest,is to have some goal in front of you eg:strive to eek out some existence in a job you
don't mind doing and save towards an existence eg:a house in the country.

Somewhere you feel safe,at peace and a place where you can be you and a place where you can freely express.

Something along those lines.

And that's on the presumption that the current system doesn't change after the pandemic.


Perhaps do a journal in the members section and just open up,like speak in third person as your speaking and relaying to your inner child.

Writing is cathartic and therapeutic,especially when one has been holding a lot within.

As for this woman,let her in and it will pay to just say to her politely and honestly,could you please back off a bit,as i'm feeling quite over whelmed at this point and i need some space.

Needing space and some time to process things.

Nothing ventured,nothing gained.


Find a niche in this world,where you can walk with your head high,
And where you,can be you.


Life is only as hard as you make it.
And or limited by ones own self defeating thoughts.


'You are the master of your own ship, pal. There are lots of people who fall into troubled waters and don't have the guts or the knowledge or the ability to make it to shore. They have nobody to blame but themselves.'

~Evel Knievel.

Keep the faith and have faith,blind faith in the unknown.