Oh my goodness.... I am just so SORRY that all of this left you feeling fearful, and as though you were going to die..
You are very very gifted...
And given that you have these gifts , it certainly does NOT mean you will die any time soon.
You were given these gifts for a reason...
Because you are an important messanger and still have work to do here.... ( Yawn yawn.. I know !!! We don't always want more work !!!! )...
But when that "work" is to help others, and you see that you are helping others, that's where your reward comes.
Try not to worry...
You are one of the "chosen" ones...