You're welcome =)

It is the first I have read that narcissists can recover, and I got curious and began searching on it online and found sources to back you up on this. However, I personally have a difficulty believing it, at least not if someone is so high up on the level of narcissism. I think they have to have narcissism and something else combined in order to get them to get therapy, and if they do, chances are they will interrupt it too soon, sad to say. The narcissist I know (who is way up there on the narcissistic ladder) do not change in any way no matter the long conversations from family etc to have a breakthrough. It just don't happen. It is just seen as yet another way to gain attention, to still stay in power. The ones who tries are only fooling themselves. It is like you are dealing with this child in this grown up body. it is so shallow, superficial, one can see nothing of real value, depht is going on on the inside. They just don't care. Instead, if anything, I would say the narcissist I know go worse by age.

From things I read sometimes I can tell they mix up narcissists and psychopaths, but they are different. Maybe that is too why the mixed bag then informs of it being trauma with psychopaths too when they are in fact born with it, as you write. I did find it strange that it's siblings, in my case, were normal in ways the psychopath was not, so that to me, personally, will make more sense - that the psychopath I was involved with - was simply born that way. I just remember feeling the energies of this individual and knowing nothing can be done.

I would return to my first opinion of him as we were moving towards the end, and in that type of situation, when you know the truth, and it hurts and make you feel very much afraid, when you are dealing with grief at the same time that what you had was just fake, even if a part of me knew it. I would say it was like being faced with evil. I could live without our relationship working, but I think I was traumatised too because of the knowing that a person like that could exist, could be that smart and get away with this and have this yes-audiance, to create these illusions. Naturally those who could see through him were out of his life. How he truly treated other people.

I do remember what you write about the incapability of those qualities. He would use words but his face would not show what his words said. I thought maybe to give him the benefit of the doubt that he was an introvert and not so sensitive, but it was that he could not feel them. There were moments I recall that I just froze. Froze from the inside out looking at him and just knowing he was different. I believe he knew he was different, as if he was an alien on this planet, walking around us, watching us. He did not have rages like a sociopath or the narcissist I know. I don't know if he controlled himself so well not to show that around me, though. He would ask me what that face meant (that I made) which surprised me as I thought naturally he like any other normal person could read my facial expressions, knowing too I was sensitive - it was all there. He would ask me (in bed, sorry to be so personal) and that surprised me too because I thought you are so connected you don't need to, but I think it was his way of not wanting to do me wrong in that situation, to frighten me, his true taste could have been different. I believe he had pre planned what role I was suppose to play, just as he had decided for others what was theirs. That was why I suddenly ended up with his ex-mistress (that he said had only been a sexual relationship and nothing more, his terms and the way he was honest and callous with me at times when explaining things - I had to really ground myself and not let my inside emotions come out, and this was very hard. This was his true face) having said to me "He gave you everything!". She had tried to get more out of him, as she had bought the product, even if he had kept treating her like a slave, she had given away her power. As I was more difficult to control he set in a more planned strategy to remove my self esteem. I remember his suprise and him then changing tactique when understanding (after the break up) that I had taken back my own power, and that never changed with me. Once I took it back - it was mine to keep. I left nothing open. I cut out not only him but the people with him. And then I worked up my self esteem. The sad part was I thought I was done with (in therapy) but I was not, and so this is why I have to do the work now, all this time later, better late than never, doing good.