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Originally Posted by BigJohn
Good for you when "I gave them a right telling off in front of everyone".
One night, I was out walking. The background noise from cars blocked out the quietness of the night. As I was crossing one street to my left, a car turned and went behind me. The car came very close and scared me. The driver just could not wait which is what they are suppose to do. I immediately ripped off a bunch of nasty words which most people have never heard in those combinations.
Can you believe it, a few minutes later, the same person came back and asked if everything was okay.
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Driving is a good metaphor for ordinary human interactions. I drive a lot in my work, and I see all kinds. I keep in mind, however, that sometimes people are just in a bigger hurry than I am. I accommodate them and don't worry about it. The reason I get in a car is because I have places to go, obviously, but the goal is to get there, not to be the king of the road. I drive accordingly - and yes, a couple times I've pulled over to let people pass only to see them pulled over by the cops up the road. Oops.
One incident that relates to your story BJ was many years ago as I came out of a market. I looked to the right and a big car with a very elderly couple in it were driving slowly towards me. It was a parking lot, where pedestrians always have the right of way, and I was in a bit of a hurry. I judged they had plenty of time to stop as I stepped out. I made it almost all the way across before I realized they weren't stopping! I leaped out of the way just in time to clear the right fender. I looked at the old couple - she was driving - and neither one was looking at me. They just kept driving, very slowly, squinting intently straight ahead, and I realized they weren't moving slowly because they were such good drivers, nor were they being rude or thoughtless - they were moving slowly because they were practically blind. I stared after them, not sure what to do next, as they reached the edge of the parking lot and pulled out into traffic. I prayed they made it home safe, and didn't cause any accidents - and that someone soon relieved them of their driving privileges.
We tend to make a lot of assumptions about other people and their motivations. We tend to be very defensive of our own space and self-perceived priority, and interpret many innocuous actions as threatening or impertinent when actually there is an entire universe out there that has nothing to do with what we think. People do things for reasons, and we are rarely interested in what those reasons are, and even less interested if it means we should take a back seat.
Of course sometimes people actually do need a good shaming, as Native Spirit pointed out. I just wonder it it's as often as people seem to think.