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Nothing wrong with talking about an ex if it is relevant to the moment. Like something in the now triggering something you experienced with an ex.
Whether it should be reason for alarm depends on how you still feel about said ex and how often it happens, the subject material etc. etc.
I can talk about an ex with ease because there aren't any feelings in the mix anymore. That also means that in general there's no reason to talk about him though, and unless it is relevant to the moment I won't do so either.
I guess there's a fine line between it being okay and being too much?
How do you know you're over an ex?
They're not on your mind anymore and there are no feelings for that person anymore. As such you don't often think nor talk about them either.
You don't long to be with them still/again.
You can have good memories, sure, but that's different from still / again wanting to be with them.
Not feeling anything in particular when you happen to see them somewhere. (not feeling anything romantically)
Your heart doesn't skip a beat when you see them.
You just know in your heart you've healed and are over them. And you know you wouldn't want or take them back (without feeling anger, resentment, regret and so on).
Not feeling anything includes anger and/or holding a grudge, bad-mouthing them etc. It's all gone to rather neutral. Something from the past that at some point was part of your life with good and less good memories. But all rather neutral nonetheless.
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