This an absolutely lovely reply. Thank you so much for taking the time to respond. Your words gave me pause immediately.
I'm extremely fortunate. My wife and I have a strong bond and great relationship. As a couple we have dealt with quite a bit and it has made us very strong. We look around at friends and family and realize almost every day how lucky we are to be together. Not everyone gets to spend a lifetime with a soulmate.
The similarity in the past life and today struck me reading your response. What I didn't mention is that my wife and I own and operate our own small business with a few partners. We both work in it and take our entire pay from the success (or not success) from the business. We have been fortunate for the last 10 years, but things are rocky in our industry. Although we aren't necessarily going to close the doors tomorrow it is looking more and more grim through the end of the year. It is likely neither my wife nor I will be able to take any income within a matter of weeks.
Good news is my wife was just offered another job yesterday (as we have seen this coming). Bad news is it doesn't completely replace our total income. So, I've been out hustling for our business but realize my efforts will not be enough. Whether the business survives or not, I don't know, but I do know I won't be a part of it in the very near future. Strangely, I'm not that emotional about it - there is a certain peace with the whole situation -except the fear of being able to provide for my family!
Sorry for the long reply, but I did want to mention a big difference and I picked up on it in your last couple of lines. I am very close with my kids. Even though we work 7 days a week a lot of times, I wake up at 4 just to make sure I don't miss dinner or soccer games or band concerts in the evenings. Just this morning my youngest son (3 years old) and I played hooky and went grocery shopping and looking for batman costumes.
So, I think I feel good about that part. I may not be perfect, but I have a great wife and a terrific family.
Thanks for responding - it's been a tough few months, but this made me put everything in perspective. I really appreciate it.