[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by Starman

Dear One, I try to have as little expectations from others as possible, given how attached I may be at any given moment to what
others may say about me. keeping in mind that no matter what anyone says, whether it be positive or negative, they are talking
about themselves and what they stand under or understand, even if they are saying it about someone else.

There gets to be a point in spiritual development where things just pass right through you and you realize that nothing is personal.
We tend to think and feel that our lives are personal, but while life is highly subjective it is not personal. What others say about you
says more about them than it does you.

There is really no "right" or "wrong," there is only various stages of development, various stages of open-ness and close-ness.
What we give to each other is the work or lack of work that we have done on ourselves. How I receive what is given to me is also
about the work or lack of work I have done on myself. Giving and receiving may be garnets cut from the same clothe but
rejection is ill-received.

It is okay if others disagree with me, I do not feel the need to defend my truth. Since life is so highly subjective, the only thing
I really have to do is prove it to myself. This is one of the great mysteries of life; once a person has discovered the deeper
truths they can't accurately tell anyone about it, because it transcends words and thoughts.

Still, If I lift you up I lift myself up and if I put you down I do the same to me. Although it is important to learn how to surf the
waves and not get caught in them. This comes with trial and error. In my opinion human life is a training ground and if nothing
more, maybe this type of behavior is and opportunity for further learning. I have to protect my own inner peace and not allow
others to take that away from me. This too takes practice.

The closer I am to my center the more serenity I feel and the less people throwing hurt at me will have any effect on me.
All of the meditation I do is as and umbrella that keeps me dry in a thunderous rainstorm. In my opinion it is all like and obstacle
course testing our resolve to get, and stay, at our center.

Hang-in There My Sister

Thank you my dear.

Upon introspective analysis, I am aware that it isn't really the case of myself expecting others to either agree or disagree with me..I feel that I am beyond approval-seeking, or courting favour.

I would just like to be able to have a logical, mature discussion as a matter of impartiality, like we both are sharing now and I can also share with quite a few others as well. I also like to understand and learn things...maybe adopt a different perspective myself, so when another says "you are wrong and I cannot be bothered telling you all the reasons why" all I can say is "why not?" I am open-minded if others would like to take the time to engage me in logical, adult discussion without harsh, unsubstantiated judgmental bias..but you are right, a lot of people may be totally incapable of doing so , which says more about them.

Of course I don't take it personally, there is no point when others are free to simply hate me for whatever reasons they may have..which, of course, is none of my business...however, I also observe that such detractors take delight in openly displaying it eg: "I could have just simply NOT wasted my time by merely refusing to post here at ALL, but I just did so to tell you why it is that I feel fully justified in placing you on my ignore list"..I mean not that I really care about that, but my rational mind does when it tries to reconcile this apparent and incongruous irrationality which does my head in every time.

Sort of like "of course I love you, but that does not mean that I have to like you"....and meanwhile, Shivani's brain implodes with an endless "what the f...?"

THIS is my problem.